the bliss momentarily disappears!

It’s odd, I know, that now that I’ve graduated and have a lot more time for writing, I seem to have no time whatsoever for writing here.

Partly, it’s because a couple of the projects I have in re-writes have been time consuming and difficult and once I tear my hair out over those, I just want to flee the laptop.

The other part is depression, because the building developers have once again postponed the date for taking over my house and so I am still stuck in this limbo: Living in a house I love that I can’t afford, which is going to be demolished really soon, which is heart-wrenching for me; and wanting to get back to New York already but not knowing when that will actually happen.

The house-limbo has been going on for over two years, already.  It is a really frustrating way to live.  Knowing that, at any moment, everything imaginable will totally change. But which moment?

However. Back to the writing projects… The original musical I am working on with the actress in NYC got unexpectedly difficult. It was one of those stretches where I knew what had to be achieved (cutting 20 minutes of monologue down to 2 minutes, tops), I knew what the high points were that needed to be touched on in those 2 minutes, and yet hours and hours and hours of re-writes, and of listening over and over to a 7-minute digital audio file as a guide,  led simply to madness. (My own, as it turned out!)

I eventually did manage to do it, and then sent it off to the actress, trying to make it seem like I hadn’t, in fact, torn my hair out. She loved it, for some unfathomable reason, so that’s  a relief. And, so, now we move onward to the next segment of Act One. (Yes, those 2 minutes comprise the very first 2 opening minutes of the play. So we only have 73 more minutes to revise…I am currently growing a fresh crop of hair.)

I had a similar experience while doing major revisions to the TV pilot. But finally found my “way in,” as it were, and the opening 7 pages suddenly & finally came (7 pages that comprise about 2 opening minutes, tops, of screen time). And while I have been waiting for feedback from the producer in L.A. this past week, I just this morning read that CBS has placed a pilot order for a TV series whose premise has way too many similarities to the 7 pages I just wrote…

So, back to the drawing board. And I wonder, do I simply go back to my original idea for the pilot and just try to make it better? Or totally tweak the idea off into some other direction? OR (and here’s another brave idea), do I just give up??? And focus on something else.

I’ve never really been the kind of writer who just gives up, though, so I’m not exactly sure how to do that. I am awaiting word from L.A. as I type…

On an uplifting note… last week, I found out from my school that I actually graduated summa cum laude, not magna cum laude, which is really kind of thrilling. So, I guess I really know Jesus, huh?  (But what the school doesn’t know is that I am tossing out about 85% of what they thought they taught me and am starting my own ministry, but I just wanted to know for certain what I didn’t believe and why I didn’t believe it, and for that, divinity school was a unique success!)

On that happy note, I gotta get ready for a conference call here and find out what new hair-tearing rewrites await me for the month of February.  Have a great Saturday, gang, wherever you are and whatever potential terrors you’re staring down!! Thanks for visiting, see ya!

zpanic

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s