We can dream, can’t we??

May 14, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Methinks the day is not gonna look quite as relaxing as this, but I’ll settle for a feeling of “ease & peace” by the end of the day, and maybe even be sporting a smile…

We shall see.

For some reason, I’m feeling distracted today. But I’m just going to let the flow take me wherever it takes me. And not fight it.

And just a head’s up!

I have next Tuesday off, which means 2 days off in a row, which means I’ve decided to do the spring cleaning! Get out the Bissel steam cleaner and get the carpeting in the whole house really clean before I head out to NYC in June (when Rasha’s mom and her little baby will be staying here with a multitude of cats…).

So, this is in my very near future and, actually, I can’t wait:

Well, just add carpeting everywhere… and cats.

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And a week from today, my best friend Valerie in Brooklyn and I will be taping our first mini-podcast for “Marilyn’s Room”. So we will see how that goes!!

It’s just a trial run, I doubt I will actually post the first one. I guess we’ll see. My main concern is learning how to use the editing tools. The rest of the “recording studio” on Substack looks simple enough.

But then we’ll be off & running (or running away), as we leap into the very serious world of painting & writing at a “certain age” after your entire young adulthood was spent getting into nothing but, well, I don’t know — trouble? Life, itself? I don’t know what to call it. But we got into it. And we’re still here! And that, in itself, is newsworthy!!

And FYI — While doing research for the podcast the other day, I came across this postcard online and wow, did it bring back a truckload of memories!! From 1981 — the important part is the description, which I guess is hard to read. I guess you’ll have to listen to the podcast to find out why it’s so important!! (It involves a bunch of us dropping acid one night and going to the Wienerwald at W.48th and Broadway…)

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Okay! Onward.

Last night, while re-listening to an audiobook of Kerouac’s Big Sur, I recalled that Henry Miller had also written something about living in Big Sur and so I went in search of a free online reading of that — and found one on YouTube.

It is so interesting. This isn’t the novel, itself. It’s more like a long excerpt from it. But I am quietly astounded by it.

Written in 1957, it’s Miller’s take on Big Sur and about artists and writers in the USA, in general, back in the late 1940s.

Personally, I relate to it because Henry Miller was a writer whose books were constantly getting banned for their erotic content. But what he also had to say about writers trying to, I don’t know, be true to their craft while surviving in America — and how they needed to find the solitude of living in the middle of nowhere in order to exist…

Well, it rang a few unexpected bells for me at this stage of my life.

I’m halfway through it (excerpt is one hour):

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And yesterday, gang…

Yes! One of the other caregivers did do all the grocery shopping!

So I did get to go with my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man to have sashimi & sake and we accidentally each got 2 fortune cookies at the end of our meal!!

His were oddly boring, but both of mine were great!!! Wow!

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And here’s this!

Keith and Ronnie clowning around in a closet! It is maybe in 1979:

And back in July of 1975, George Harrison visits backstage in LA, during the Stones’ 1975 tour. (Billy Preston played keyboards for the Stones during that tour.)

And Keith with James Mitchell, in the Royal Recording Studios in Memphis, in 1988:

AND —

I know I’ve posted this one before, but it is one of my all-time favorite shots of Keith (I have it, in 2 different sizes, stuck on my wall). And it was the first photo that popped up in my Instagram feed today!!

Keith, in LA, in 1969!!

Not smoking, but otherwise, so totally Keith!

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Yesterday, Nick Cave sent out a really cool Red Hand File. It was so candid and, just, I don’t know. I just loved it. Mostly, he talked about his sleeping habits — and dreaming habits or lack thereof. He wrote it while in a cab, heading to a recording studio, to perhaps begin a new record with some of the Bad Seeds. (Yay!) He said, in part:

“…I am going to Islington to mess around in the studio with Marty (he’s well now), Thomas (him too), Jim (always robust), and Warren (still lovely and deranged) with the vague idea of perhaps making a new record. …”

However, he also stated that women are generally attracted to men (and women) who wear suits….while I love Nick Cave in anything he chooses to wear, I am totally not in the “attracted to suits” category!! I’m blue-collar all the way!!

But whichever way you lean, you can read the Red Hand File, in full, HERE!!

And meanwhile —

Here’s this!!

A couple of shots of Nick Cave wearing an interesting expression!!

*****

And that is it for today.

I’m hoping this will be a good day, gang. We shall soon find out.

Have a great Thursday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Let’s close with this.

Bonnie Tyler is going through some very difficult health problems. As of right now, she’s in a medically-induced coma, but her condition is stable. But it sounds very serious.

So here’s this. Her fantastic, international mega hit from 1978. “It’s A Heartache.” Thanks, Bonnie. Enjoy, gang.

“It’s A Heartache”

It’s a heartache
Nothing but a heartache
Hits you when it’s too late
Hits you when you’re down

It’s a fool’s game
Nothing but a fool’s game
Standing in the cold rain
Feeling like a clown

It’s a heartache
Nothing but a heartache
Love him ’til your arms break
Then he lets you down

It ain’t right with love to share
When you find he doesn’t care for you
It ain’t wise to need someone
As much as I depended on you

It’s a heartache
Nothing but a heartache
Hits you when it’s too late
Hits you when you’re down

It’s a fool’s game
Nothing but a fool’s game
Standing in the cold rain
Feeling like a clown

It ain’t right with love to share
When you find he doesn’t care for you
It ain’t wise to need someone
As much as I depended on you

Oh, it’s a heartache
Nothing but a heartache
Love him ’til your arms break
Then he lets you down

It’s a fool’s game
Standing in the cold rain
Feeling like a clown

It’s a heartache
Love him ’til your arms break
Then he lets you down

It’s a fool’s game
Standing in the cold rain

c – 1977 – Ronnie Scott, Victor William Batty

A wonder-filled Wednesday in the Hinterlands! Please join us!

May 13, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 2 Comments

Well, I have to say that, now that Annie has left us, I have no idea what to expect on Wednesdays at the home of my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man!

He has been with 2 other caregivers since I saw him 4 days ago.

It is a gorgeous day and I really want to take him out for sashimi & sake because we haven’t been to the Peony Bistro in, like, 2 weeks. But I have no clue what will await me when I walk in that door — mainly, did anybody do any grocery shopping since I was last there??

We can only hope. But we will find out.

I’m hoping someone did, so that our day can be filled with this instead!!

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Meanwhile!

Wayne and some of his family will soon land in Australia!! And yesterday, I got his first official Vacation Text!

Here’s Wayne and his younger brother smoking outside JFK early yesterday, wherein Wayne assured me that from now on, he would be WhatsApp-ing me nothing but fantastic photos from Australia and Vietnam!!

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Wow!

Did my heart leap for joy yesterday, when I fetched the mail and discovered that THIS book had arrived!!

Obviously, I haven’t had time to actually read it yet, but just skimming through it — it’s incredible! So many photos of handwritten notes from Tom Petty to the author (a long-time record promoter & friend of Tom’s). And candid photos from 1976 up to when Tom passed away in 2017.

Tom Petty was never very gregarious with the Press. He stuck to whatever tour or album he was promoting at the time. So when you get a chance to get some access to the real Tom Petty — what a thrill. He was so funny. So smart.

Anyway. I cannot wait to read it. I have, you know, sort of a TON of stuff to do in the meantime, but I’ll somehow slip it in.

(PS: No, my cool Tom Petty Zippo lighter has still not arrived… It takes FOREVER to get anything from the Tom Petty Store. Perhaps he ships stuff out personally from the afterlife…)

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All righty!

Here’s a few great ones from Phyllis Stein!!

Richard Hell in Paris this past December! (I’m pretty sure he was there to discuss lofty French concepts, like “le grenier, le toit, et le plafond” but I’m not 100% certaine…)

And Johnny Thunders at Max’s Kansas City in NYC, 1979!

And The New York Dolls in Los Angeles in 1973!!

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You know, here’s something that reminds me of how incredibly grateful I am to Gram Parsons. Without him, I never would have had Emmylou Harris in my life and her music has meant SO MUCH to me, gang. (Her music career really took off when she became a singer in his band in 1972.)

And here’s this gem, while we’re at it!! From 1975, “Amarillo,” from her wonderful (and first #1) album, Elite Hotel. Give it a listen if you are unfamiliar with her records:

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Something else I’m incredibly grateful for!!

Photographer Peter Milne’s decision to take this fantastic photo and share it with the world! One of my all-time favorites of Nick Cave…

And here’s a couple more of Nick Cave while we’re at it!

Nick with Rowland S. Howard (and the Birthday Party) in Greece in 1982!!

And remember, if you missed the gig in Greece in 1982!! —

While, sadly, you can no longer see Rowland S. Howard or the Birthday Party, you can still see Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds in Greece this summer!! Tickets are still available for the show in Athens on June 24th! Buy Tickets HERE!!

And here’s Nick Cave a handful of decades later…

Photo by Tricia Yourkevich/BBC:

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Okay!

Here’s this!!

Keith!! Smiling! Smoking! Drinking! And in no way needing sleep in the early 1990s!!

And Keith backstage, not smoking but needing something, not sure what, in either the USA in late 1981 or in Europe in early 1982…

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And late yesterday afternoon, Phil had some really devastating news to share about his personal life. I was really just stunned. He is divorcing his wife, Keri. He went into the very unsettling details about why.

This is the link if you missed it.

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And I guess that is it.

Things here are kind of okay, gang. I am sort of “forcing” myself to keep my mind in some sort of balance between caregiving and my overall life as a writer.

It is working, but I literally have to take it moment by moment.

And with that, I gotta scoot and head to town.

Have a wonder-filled Wednesday, whether you’re in the Hinterlands or somewhere else in the far-flung, beautiful world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Let’s close with this!!!

From the CD in the retro boombox next to my bed this morning!! (Well, the retro boombox is always next to my bed, but this is from the CD that was in it this morning!!)

George, Tom, Bob, Roy, and Jeff!!!

“…I’m so tired of being lonely, I still have some love to give…“

Yes, the Traveling Wilburys‘ first monster hit, from 1988!! “Handle With Care”. I just love these guys and this song!! Enjoy, gang!!

So exciting!!

May 12, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 2 Comments

Yes!

Just when I needed it most yesterday!!!

The printer died!!

As in: Sayonara, baby!! Kiss the printer goodbye!!

After about an hour of trying everything imaginable to fix it, I got onto the Best Buy app and just bought a new one. It will be ready for me to pick up on Friday.

AND– it was actually cheaper than I could have ever imagined!! (When did printers get so affordable??)

I’m just not gonna stress over any more shit right now, you know? Just get a new printer! But it did totally wreck the creative flow I was having with Caiaphas…

Meanwhile, I’m hoping that the backup ink cartridges I have will fit the new printer. I tried to buy the closest model I could find to the old one. We shall see.

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In other good news!!

The guy in NYC finished reading the review copy of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder!! He really liked it. He said, among other things, that he had gotten “emotionally invested in what happened to Jem” (the protagonist).

He ultimately said: “Bravo! It reads like a true fairy tale — in the best sense of that categorization.”

As soon as the book becomes available for sale, he’ll review it on Amazon for me.

Meanwhile, if you want to pre-order it, you can do that HERE. Thank you!!

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You know, I keep forgetting to mention here that I don’t think “Wild Thing” works at the Rural King anymore.

The last 5 times I’ve been there — different days, different times — he hasn’t been at the checkout counter. Well, maybe they moved him to a different department (the guns & ammo section??), I don’t know. I usually only buy cat food and then pay and go.

Well, wherever he is — Paris, perhaps?? Brushing up on his French?? — I hope he’s having the best life!!

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Okay. I kinda gotta get moving here and head to town soon. It is a really lovely day today, though. I hope my clients want me to go out and run a bunch of errands!!

I don’t have many “here’s this’s” today but–

Here’s this!!

Keith and Mick in California, in 1969! Photo by the legendary rock photographer, Ethan Russell:

And Keith, smoking while going somewhere and looking happy, while also wearing a grey suit and some shades!!

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I loved this!!

Eric Burdon turned 85 yesterday!!

Posted by his grandchild:

And here’s this, while we’re at it! “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood,” by Eric Burdon and the Animals, 1965!

(BTW — I quoted the chorus to this song as my comment accompanying my Graduation photo in my Senior High School Yearbook, 1978.)

“Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood”

Baby, do you understand me now
Sometimes I feel a little mad
But don’t you know that no one alive
Can always be an angel
When things go wrong I seem to be bad

But I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood

Baby, sometimes I’m so carefree
With a joy that’s hard to hide
And sometimes it seems that all I have to do is worry
And then you’re bound to see my other side

I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood

If I seem edgy I want you to know
That I never mean to take it out on you
Life has its problems and I get my share
And that’s one thing I never meant to do
Because I love you
Oh, Oh baby don’t you know I’m human
Have thoughts like any other one
Sometimes I find myself long regretting
Some foolish thing some little simple thing I’ve done

I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood
Yes, I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood
Yes, I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood
Yes, I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood …

c – 1965 – Sol Marcus, Bennie Benjamin, Gloria Caldwell

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And from Nick Cave Official yesterday:

And here’s this!!

Nick Cave in London, in 2022!

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And that is it.

I really gotta scoot!

Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

**********

Okay, we’ll close with this!!

One of those songs I recognized from the very first piano note–

As it came out of the Oldies FM Radio Station on my retro boombox, when I was getting ready for bed last night. I could not help but sing along!

“Tiny Dancer,” Elton John. From his classic, Madman Across the Water, 1971. Enjoy, gang.

WARNING: This site in no way idealizes smoking…ever.

May 11, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 3 Comments

Okay, so.

Day 2 in absolute mental overload — but the brain is still working just fine.

I am of course referring to the commitment I made to write an entire play about Caiaphas in the month of June (wherein I will also be in NYC for 4 days). (See yesterday’s post if you missed it.)

I have to say, gang, just going over the piles of notes — alone — will take an entire month, but I’m still moving forward. And I feel really good about it.

This bit of monologue floored me. (First, let me just point out that Caiaphas’ entire reputation for being the man behind killing Jesus is based on basically one line in the New Testament and it basically only states that the “trial” went on in his home. It was more the doings of his father-in-law and brothers-in law (also High Priests), but after 70 AD, Pharisaic Christians wanted to re-frame that. Hence, my desire to write a play about how a man’s horrific reputation, which, throughout eternity has basically been false, is seen from that man’s POV in the afterlife.)

Anyway. I digress.

I came across this scribbled bit of monologue in my notes from 2014 and I loved it:

(Caiaphas speaking): “The bounty I gave to the world because I gave it a picture of the crucifixion of God’s son.”

FUCK, right??!! Think of everything that has come from it: Religions, wars, art.

Anyway.

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Okay.

So I’m in a good place. I’m not losing my mind or living in overdrive. My only –albeit small — regret, is that I didn’t write the whole play back in 2016, when all the notes were fresh. (Most of the notes are historical and archeological, and now it’s looking like I gotta read all that stuff again.)

But I’m okay.

And yesterday, since it was Mother’s Day, I had a nice phone chat with my birth mom, finally.

Yes! I called her on the phone and she actually answered it.

But it appears that on Friday and Saturday, the other daughters, granddaughters and great-granddaughter, celebrated Mother’s Day with her in various lovely ways.

And my brother was going to be stopping by later in the afternoon yesterday, so she was sitting alone in her living room with nothing to do and so when the phone rang, she answered it.

She sounded in good spirits and that always makes me feel great.

Regarding all the caregiving stuff in my world, though, it is still a bit overwhelming and I have to make a dedicated effort to draw some sort of inner emotional lines for myself. We’ll see how that goes. But meanwhile.

Oh! I finally finished watching the Netflix film, “Je m’appelle Anjeta” last night, and I really just loved it, all the way through. It was so fun!

And, speaking — sort of — of France (the movie is in Swedish and French and takes place in Provence), I’m still studying my French every evening and, after studying French for something like 57 years now–

This past week, I learned 3 new words. Well, I’m always learning new words, but these 3 are for common, ordinary things, but I am JUST NOW learning them. I find that so weird.

The words are:

Plafond (ceiling)
Grenier (attic)
Toit (roof)

I guess, you know, I’ve always needed to learn about stuff that didn’t involve looking up in any way. But I just find that so weird. After all these years. And I did not even realize that I did not know these words.

ME (all over Paris): “Excusez-moi, où est le toit ?” [“Excuse me, where is the roof?”]

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Okay!

Yesterday was not only Mother’s Day (here in the USA) — it was also this guy’s heavenly birthday!

Happy Heavenly Birthday to Sid Vicious!

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And here’s this!

Keith, doing something he’s really good at besides smoking– being HAPPY!

And here’s this!

Keith and Mick, not smoking at a soundcheck in Malmo, Sweden, in August 1970. (I think they are singing that classic Beatles’ song, “Help,” but I’m not 100% sure.)

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I loved these!!

Nick Cave not smoking in a brownish suit!

And Nick Cave not smoking onstage in Hamburg in June, 1982!

And don’t forget!!

If you missed the Hamburg gig in 1982, Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds will be all over Germany this summer and tickets are still available! Buy them HERE!!!

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And I think that is it, gang!

It is, of course, my illustrious day off.

Laundry is already done!

No vacuuming is needed today!! (I will give you a moment to pick yourself up off the floor after that shocking remark!)

And all that I gotta do now is take a deep breath and, I guess, dive into a truckload of notes I made 10–12 years ago, sort them all out, and create a play!

Enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world, gang.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you witih this!

Morning-listening music!!

I had it on “repeat” through most of breakfast.

I love this song so much. (It reminds me of most of my family, on my birth dad’s side, going back 150 years…)

Recording the song caused Tom Petty a lot of problems:

Story of Tom Petty punching a wall in 1984 breaking his hand (2 mins):

Originally from the album, Southern Accents, Tom Petty & the Heartbreaker’s “Rebels”, 1985. (This is an alternate take, from his posthumous collection, An American Treasure.) Enjoy, gang!

“Rebels”

Honey, don’t walk out, I’m too drunk to follow
You know you won’t feel this way tomorrow
Well, maybe a little rough around the edges
Or inside a little hollow
I get faced with some things sometimes
That are so hard to swallow, hey!

I was born a rebel, down in Dixie
On a Sunday mornin’
Yeah with one foot in the grave
And one foot on the pedal
I was born a rebel, born a rebel

She picked me up in the mornin’
And she paid all my tickets
Then she screamed in the car
Left me out in the thicket
Well I never would’ve dreamed
That her heart was so wicked
Yeah but I keep coming back
‘Cause it’s so hard to kick it, hey, hey, hey

I was born a rebel, down in Dixie
On a Sunday mornin’
Yeah with one foot in the grave
And one foot on the pedal
I was born a rebel, born a rebel

Even before my father’s father
They called us all rebels
As they burned our cornfields
And left our cities leveled
I can still feel the eyes of those blue-bellied devils
Yeah, when I’m walking ’round tonight
Through the concrete and metal, hey, hey, hey

I was born a rebel, down in Dixie
On a Sunday mornin’
Yeah with one foot in the grave
And one foot on the pedal
I was born a rebel, born a rebel

Hey hey hey

c – 1984 Tom Petty

“You’d think she’d be used to it by now.”

May 10, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 4 Comments

I am, of course, referring to how dumbfounding it is to be ME.

I just don’t get it sometimes (most of the time).

Since I have all sorts of free time these days (!!), when the Dramatists Guild sent out an alert yesterday that it was almost time for this year’s End of Play program to begin, wherein you get one month (June) to write an entire play, while “posting weekly updates to the community tracking the progress”, I decided I’d better sign up!

You know, write an entire play in the month of June, while being tracked by an entire community the whole time.

WTF???

So I signed up!

WTF??

Not only am I always scrambling for quality time to focus and write around here, I am also going to be in NYC from June 11th thru June 14th…

However.

My thought process was that, after having stumbled across my 12-year-old notes (see some previous blog post from a few days ago) for my play-in-progress about Caiaphas, and being kind of blown away by the quality of the notes, as well as how fucking long ago I made those notes —

It seemed like: well, it doesn’t have to be a perfect, final draft of a play. It just needs to be a finished first draft…

And I thought it would be a good way to not lose track of the play entirely and at least write one version of it before I die.

And I knew that, not only did I have those notes really handy now, but I also knew there was a version of the play that I had indeed begun writing, in a Dropbox file marked “Caiaphas” on my desktop.

So, last evening, to refresh my memory, I began re-reading Tom Stoppard’s 1967 play “Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead” to see the various mechanisms that had originally inspired my approach to writing my play.

I got 20 pages in, and then I thought: I need to stop reading, and in the morning, just get out those first few pages of the draft I already wrote, and read it, and begin from there.

And I went to sleep feeling sort of guilty about committing myself to such an intense writing task right now — but it is only for one month, and I do sort of/kind of have some wiggle room in the month of June, project-wise…

There are still 4 months before the new novel comes out. I won’t need to focus on “The Guide to being Fabulous” until summer. If Sandra and I do get the okay to work on the TV pilot, that won’t be underway until July. And the upcoming launch of the mini-podcast with Valerie will get under way later in May… So June is, yeah, well, sort of “open”…

I don’t know, gang. I went to sleep feeling like I’m sort of/kind of losing my mind.

However.

This morning, after all the breakfast shenanigans were over, and I was on cup of coffee #2, I found the “Caiaphas” folder in the Dropbox (and found DOZENS of notes, notes, and more notes — and photos of ancient tombs and ossuaries in there, as well!!)

And I opened the document for the play (that I had written in late 2016 (!!) for fuck’s sake!! Crikey!!!! I’ve lived in 3 houses since I started writing that fucking play!!!).

The play is almost 3 pages so far. And I am not exaggerating, gang, when I say that I was blown away by this fucking play.

It is SO FUN!!

Here are just a couple of samplings from page 2:

Down in the burial cave, STAGE RIGHT, by one of the niches, CAIAPHAS leans against the wall, listening to the conversation above. He is dressed in a black tee shirt, black blazer, black tight-fitting jeans, and he wears Spanish-heeled boots of black leather. 

For our purposes, the cave is not cramped. Caiaphas is tall and lean —in his prime. He is clean-shaven, with thick, curly dark hair —not too short, not too long.

Caiaphas also wears black Ray Ban wayfarer sunglasses, circa 1960s, and smokes a cigarette(...)

CAIAPHAS (to audience):  Did you catch that part, Yeshua bar Yehosef? Or ‘Joshua son of Joseph’ – for those of you who haven’t kept up on your Biblical Aramaic. Yeshua. Joshua – Josh. If you prefer Greek, then Iesous – or Jesus. Yes, that one. ‘Jesus son of Joseph.’ (Caiaphas tosses his cigarette to the ground and stamps it out with his boot heel.) Filthy habit. But it’s not what killed me. (He smiles broadly; a genuine smile, filled with warmth and good humor. He removes his sunglasses, sliding them into a pocket.) (...)

(...)And I am Yehosef bar Caiaphas – Joseph son of Caiaphas. You can call me Joe. (Walking DOWN CENTER) Look at me. I look good for 60, don’t I? Where I come from … 60 is the new 35! But seriously (...)

(...) Anyway. I was born here in Jerusalem; back in that murky era referred to now as ‘B.C.’ – ‘Before Christ’ – and I died here, too, but God knows, it was in the ‘A.D.’ (He chuckles) Get it? A.D. – After Death? Of Christ?  (Pause) Look me up on the Internet if you don’t understand why that’s funny. (...)

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BTW–

If you don’t know who Caiaphas was:

“Caiaphas, the Jewish High Priest, orchestrated the arrest, interrogation, and conviction of Jesus, pushing for his execution to appease Roman authorities and protect his own power. He presided over the midnight trial of Jesus before the Sanhedrin, accusing him of blasphemy, and subsequently delivered him to Pontius Pilate to ensure his crucifixion.”

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So, you know, this morning, I read over the 3 pages of this play I started writing 10 years ago…

And I realized that my signing up to participate in the End Of Play program was a sign that I am meant to write this fucking PLAY. And not a sign that I am out of my mind.

Perhaps even a sign that there is some sort of spiritual guidance happening here, that is trying to lead me back to my writing and to stop me from feeling so overwhelmed by the caregiving all the time.

We are going to find out.

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Okay!

Let’s get to the “here’s this’s” because I have to get some stuff done (God knows) before I head out to see the retired Minister and his lovely wife and cat.

So here’s this!

I loved this!!

Lenny Kaye & friends (!!), at Kerouac’s grave!

*********

And here’s this!

A lovely photo of Brian Jones, with a bunch of bedside phones, by Terry O’Neill:

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And a couple from Phyllis Stein!

Willy Deville in New Orleans!

Richard Hell, smoking at CBGBs 1978!

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And a couple of vintage Nick Cave photos to round it all out!

Nick Cave at Mute Records in London. Photo by Phil Nicholls, for Melody Maker, August 1986:

And Nick Cave with a similar expression, photo by Bleddyn Butcher, but I don’t know what year:

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And that will be it for now.

I still need to do yoga and begin listening to a new lecture by James Tabor in the “Christianity Before Paul” class, before heading to town. (And also, you know, start sorting through all the many notes for that “Caiaphas” play I’m going to entirely write in June…)

Enjoy your Sunday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

**********

I leave you with this!!

Another winner in the making-the-bed-music-listening department!!

I literally switched on the Oldies FM Radio Station on the retro boom box to begin making my bed, and this ABSOLTUE GEM was just coming on, and I swear, the cats all came darting in again, tails up high, and started playing and racing around.

They LOVE music from the 80s!! I am not kidding!

Anyway.

Wham! “Wake Me Up before You Go-Go”!! Enjoy the fuck out of it, gang. We sure did!!

It was a success!

May 9, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 4 Comments

I don’t want to sound too “excited” about it because we were getting him ready for Annie’s funeral, but I arrived at my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man’s house at 7:15 am yesterday, and he woke up the moment I stepped into his room.

On some level, he seemed to be aware of the funeral and I was able to get him out of bed and start dressing immediately. He even remembered that his shirt needed cufflinks, although he couldn’t remember the word for it. But he remembered where the wooden jewelry box was that contained them.

I so WISH I could share the photo I took of him after he was dressed and ready to go — I texted the photo to his daughter in Seattle, so that she would be assured that everything was going well.

The photo was GREAT. He looked GREAT in his suit and tie. His daughter was so happy. But obviously, I can’t share a photo that private on the blog.

His stepson – & – stepdaughter-in- law arrived by 8am. And everything really just went so smoothly.

And the stepson texted me late last evening to say that he is taking us to lunch today! So that should really be nice.

Probably not us, but I guess we shall see!

*************

So I worked for an hour and a half yesterday, then headed over to the old train station, saw Wendy, then had an early lunch with Steve!

Gave Steve the review copy of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder. And since he worked as a social worker for about 30 years, we both feel confident that he will not find the novel too disturbing, or hard to handle.

Mainly, he was just really happy for me that the novel is finally coming out.

Remember that you can pre-order it HERE.

**********

And after my shift today, I’m stopping over at the fully restored Historic Arcade, to drop off a review copy of the novel for Kevin at his beautiful art gallery there.

I’m really looking forward to seeing what the Arcade is like when it isn’t hosting an art expo in that main hallway. I want to see if the vibe is the same. I just loved it when I visited it a couple weeks ago (for the first time). We shall soon see!

The Historic Arcade in downtown Newark — and please note, there is a really nice used bookstore there!!

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Okay.

Apparently, yesterday was Robert Johnson‘s heavenly birthday!! He was born on May 8, 1911.

From Phyllis Stein!

And here’s this again! I love this song…

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And today is Beat Poet/Buddha Gary Snyder‘s 96th birthday!

I thought this news was so cool, since I am re-listening to the audiobook of The Dharma Bums at night, and one of the main characters in the novel is based on Gary. I’m up to Chapter 27:

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The house that Patsy Cline and her husband lived in when she died is now a renovated retro-vacation home. You can rent it!! It’s not far from Nashville.

Here’s the really cool basement!!

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And here’s this!!

Sort of an odd bit of info:

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And here’s this!

Franz Kafka with his sometimes-betrothed, Felice Bauer!

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Here’s this!!

James Tabor sent this out to us on Patreon yesterday. It’s from the Israeli newspaper, Haaretz:

The Mysterious Copper Scroll and the End of Days

“One stood among the Dead Sea Scrolls: made of metal, and seemingly never meant to be read. Who made it, when and why, and how was Bar-Kokhba involved? Shimon Gibson presents a new theory”

[full article is here]

“**The Copper Scroll, never read by human eyes except the people who commissioned and made it of course”** Credit: Abraham Meir Habermann

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And here’s this!!

Keith in Kingston in 1972!

It’s funny, but during our lunch yesterday, Steve told me that he remembers me telling him, when we were about 13, that I wanted to go on the road with the Rolling Stones. You know, as a performer.

I have no recollection of this, but it sure sounds like me. I was already writing dozens of songs back then. It was my whole world.

But what I think is SO COOL — even though I wouldn’t meet her for another 20 years, right around the time I was saying that to Steve, Sandra was already off in Berlin, with Romy Haag, Bowie and Iggy, and she worked briefly as a female backup singer for the Rolling Stones during the German leg of their European tour!!

Just a reminder — Sandra, back then!! (about 10 years before her transition surgery):

And just FYI — you might want to come see our play, “The Guide to being Fabulous” all about Sandra’s life…

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And what is not to love about this??!!

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds sitting in a fountain-type thingie, lighting cigarettes!!

And what’s not to love about this, while we’re at it??

Nick Cave and Grinderman, not smoking on the stairs!! (It almost seems like they’re refusing to smoke…)

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And speaking of Nick Cave…

He sent out a Red Hand File yesterday, wherein he replied to 2 very different letters. But one of them was about the painter/teacher Philip Guston. Nick said, in part:

“…Bruce, I couldn’t let this one go! I’m stunned that you had Philip Guston as an art teacher. I didn’t know he was one! Such a brilliant artist – an extraordinary colourist and master of paint, subversive, radical, playful, tough. I’m envious! …”

You can read it in full HERE.

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And that is it for now!

I gotta scoot and head to town for what should be a very nice day.

Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*************

Let’s close with this!

Late night listening-music, after listening to a few chapters of The Dharma Bums audiobook!

My friend Steve recently took his eldest son to see Bob Dylan in concert and Steve said that Dylan was still really great.

He sang mostly songs from the 2020 album, Rough & Rowdy Ways, which I love and hadn’t listened to in a while!

So here you go! It sounds wonderful, lying alone in bed in the dark! Or, I guess, just maybe right now…

Bob Dylan, from Rough & Rowdy Ways, 2020, the song, “I’ve Made Up My Mind to Give Myself to You”. Enjoy, gang!!

No post today

May 8, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Leaving here early this morning, so no time to post.

Have a great Friday, gang, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

No reason why this shouldn’t be me today!

May 7, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

But, man, life just keeps getting so fucking weird that I never really know if I’m having a good day until it’s, like, basically over.

However.

So far, today is seeming pretty good. It’s sunny. I have the day to myself. The only thing on the “List of Things to Do” besides yoga and washing my hair, is, of course (always) this:

Oops! Excuse me. Of course, I meant this:

Oh! Shoot!! Sorry. No, I meant THIS:

************

Yesterday was, overall, sort of lovely.

My favorite 95-year-old Japanese man is now very aware that Annie has died. And he’s sad but handling it very well. We had a good day together, and early tomorrow morning, I’m heading over there to help him get into his suit and tie in order to go to the funeral.

He said about 7 times yesterday that he doesn’t want to go to the funeral. But we’ll see what happens in the morning, when his stepson comes by to get him.

Meanwhile, his daughter has requested that I be the new primary contact person for her dad, now that she’s back in Seattle.

The Agency asked me how I felt about that and, obviously, I said “okay”, since it all landed in my lap anyway, when Annie suddenly went into the coma and then died. (And then I suddenly had to find out who/where his Primary Care Doctor was and go to the office and explain what had happened and who I was; then find out where he got his prescriptions filled and go pick them up; and find out who and where his favorite barber is; and then find someone to cut his lawn this summer because the boy who did it last summer moved away; and then go to the grocery store, and then, you know, go to the grocery store, and then, yesterday, yes, go back to the grocery store….)

All the stuff Annie always did. For 8 years…

Anyway.

Of course I will do it.

But I also have a new novel coming out and I’m trying to find people who will give the book an advance review online, and trying to get my profile updated on the various social media sites. And get that weekly mini-podcast underway and launched with my best friend Valerie in Brooklyn, who desperately needs a new iPhone and who always seems to be at the dentist’s. And Sandra & I have a play that has a Staged Reading Off-Broadway in NYC in November. And we might or might not be writing a new TV pilot this summer — we don’t know yet.

While I’m also taking care of 17 love-filled, happy cats…

So I feel a little overwhelmed…

********

However!

Tomorrow, after I get my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man into his suit and tie, I’ll be heading over to the old train station to get my review copy back from Wendy and then– !!

Having lunch there with my friend Steve!! The guy I’ve been friends with since we were 11 years old, and who has texted me sort of repeatedly for the last 5 months, wanting to know when we can go out to lunch again…

So tomorrow is finally the day and that will be nice.

Having lunch with the only person left on Earth who’s known me since I was 11.

***********

And then this morning, for God only knows what reason, I found myself suddenly thinking:

ME (suddenly thinking): I should go to Columbus more often. Go to the theater and see more plays….

WTF???

You know, where did that come from??? Did it have something to do with that dream I had the other night, that I had moved back into my old house and was really happy???

I have no fucking idea.

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Okay.

Meanwhile!!

I am watching this movie on Netflix and LOVING it!! (It’s in Swedish and French, with nothing but tons of subtitles so my eyes get a little tired, but I love it!)

“Je m’appelle Agneta”:

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And here’s this!

Keith! At Redlands, in 1966:

And Keith! Not at Redlands, and not in 1966!

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And here’s this!!

“The Weeping Song” from 1990, because I love this video and because I’ve been listening to The Good Son album a lot lately (such a great album):

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And I think I’ll close this with that. (And NO! I’m not going to say: “I can ‘t believe this video is 36 fucking years old already… where is the fucking time going??”)

I’m just going to leave it. With no comment about TIME.

And get on with my day.

Maybe hop in the car and drive all the way to fucking Columbus and see a play…

Meanwhile!

Enjoy your Thursday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*************

I leave you with this!

My making-the-bed music from this morning!

From Keith’s 2015 album, Crosseyed Heart, his version of the classic, “Goodnight Irene.” Enjoy, gang.

Almost sort of back to normal

May 6, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Okay, well, today I’m heading out to see my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man and it will be the first time I’m seeing him since he found out from his daughter that Annie died.

I’m sort of expecting him to be mostly okay with it, since he has a firm belief that: a.) everyone’s spirits live on; and b.) he believes we all go to a better place when we die.

His daughter has already left for the airport to fly back home this morning. So, we will soon see how today goes.

And Friday, my shift with him has been totally turned around. I need to get to his house by 7:30AM, and help him get into his suit and tie . His stepson from Florida will be picking him up at 8:30AM to take him to the funeral.

So, yes, I’ll be driving for an hour, total, to help him for one hour. And then after that, the new normal without Annie in our lives will officially begin.

But, I will have the rest of Friday off. So that’s, you know, I guess nice.

**********

On Saturday, I’m heading back to this lovely place:

To drop off a review copy of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder for Kevin at his beautiful gallery there:

Even though we’re both kinda thinking the novel will be too extreme for his tastes, too, he wants to at least try to read it, which I appreciate!! So we shall see. But it gives me a great reason to go back to that really beautiful Historic Arcade in downtown Newark.

It is, of course, sort of mystifying to me that I’ve apparently written a novel that a lot of people can’t handle — even my best friend Valerie in Brooklyn gave up on it because she was afraid it was going to give her bad dreams. And Wendy only finished the book because she was trying to be a good friend to me.

But I think back to 1999, when my first book, Neptune & Surf, was just coming out and Barnes & Noble (at first) refused to carry it because of the novella in it, called “Gianni’s Girl”.

But then they changed their minds when The Guardian newspaper in London chose the book as one of their Top 10 Summer Reads that year.

When I had first completed writing “Gianni’s Girl,” I was so thrilled with what I had achieved, I immediately stuck the story in a manila envelope and mailed it downtown to my good friend, (the late) Holly Lane.

She read it and then called me and said, “What the fuck did I just read??? First, they’re bringing in a Great Dane, next it’s an incredible love story?? You have totally fucked with my head!” And then later, out on the street together one night, she said, “You know you’re a sociopath, right?” (Actually, I didn’t know.)

But N&S eventually came out in 6 editions — including trade paper, mass market, Book-of-the-Month hardcover, eBook, and 2 French editions. (And is now in the Internet Archive for eternity.)

And then I think about that French podcast I stumbled upon in the Archive the other day, wherein the podcaster said :

“… I would say the author possesses a gift for sweeping you away, for immersing you in the world she portrays. Yes, for she tells tales of worlds—of entire eras.”

And she was including “Gianni’s Girl,” which takes place among violent Chicago bootleggers in the 1920s.

So, you know, I guess you just gotta go with what comes out of your head and hits the page, and hope that, down the line, you’ll find that there was a reason for it, overall.

Oh, I do have to add that the guy in NYC who’s reading a review copy, is almost done reading the book and, so far, he’s still really liking the book.

So, don’t forget that you can pre-order it, in eBook or print, HERE if you’re interested in seeing if you can handle it or not…

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Okay, here’s this!!

Two guitar heroes — Steve Vai and Joe Satriani — are once again on tour together!!

From Minneapolis the other night:

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Here’s Keith and Patti (early 80s?) having what might be a pizza together?? Hard to tell, it’s tiny!

And I loved this!!

Perhaps they had Keith under constant surveillance, you know, after he’d famously woken up one night in his hotel bed in Florida, put a riff down quickly on a tape recorder, then passed right out again — and later, what he’d composed in his sleep, basically, became the Stones first huge monster mega hit, “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction”!!

Here’s this, while we’re at it!!

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And here’s this!!

Warren Ellis, ready for his close-up at the Met Gala!! (I think a day late, but I’m not positive!!)

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And a couple of beautiful shots of Nick Cave onstage. I don’t know when, where, or photos-by-whom, but I love them!!

I think this one is in Croatia, actually, but I’m not positive. And I think the photographer’s name is down in the corner.

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And that is it for now!!

I guess I’m gonna get ready to head to town and find out just what this day is gonna bring.

Have a wonder-filled Wednesday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys, See ya!

*********

Let’s close with these!

You can pre-order Foreign Tongues, the upcoming new album by the Rolling Stones, HERE!! Enjoy, gang!

“In the Stars”:

“Rough and Twisted”:

Sorry I’m Late!

May 5, 2026 marilyn jaye lewis 4 Comments

It’s Primary Election Day here in Ohio, so I had to go out and do that thing.

But I am back!

I don’t know if it’s just me, gang, but things feel so weird today.

For one thing, I had so many vivid dreams last night. Like someone was trying really, really hard to tell me something.

In one dream, I was in the house I owned about 10 years ago. I was unpacking and moving back in. And I was really happy about it, but it was as if I was returning there from having been in a sort of coma.

All the cats were there and happy I was back. And then at one point, an official sort of woman — don’t know how to describe her — brought in my Aunt Sylvia, my Great Aunt Gertrude, and my grandfather!!

All of these relatives have been dead for a really long time. But they were all really happy to be back and I was so happy to see them. (They were from my adoptive maternal side of the family.)

In another dream, I literally could not keep my eyelids open and I was going around doing important stuff (including driving on the freeway) with my eyes shut — trying really hard to lift my eyelids so that I could see.

But there was a lot more to the dreams than that, and all of it was totally lucid dreaming. Not something I’ve done in a really long time. So that, in itself, felt really strange.

But I did get the impression, when all the dreams were over, that I’ve been “asleep in the dream of life” for a few years or something and I’m trying to wake up again.

However — wasn’t it sort of like this image I posted yesterday??? About letting anxiety take a back seat for awhile?? Too weird!!

************

Okay. Anyway.

I voted. I have the day off. I’m not super happy about losing all that money for today — Tuesdays are good money days for me. But I’ve decided that I will try to just stay relaxed (that’s my new “idea” — to relax). And have a good day.

We’re gonna see how that goes.

I just feel so fucking strange.

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Okay. Did you visit the Rolling Stones web site yet??

It’s too fun. It opens with a “studio surveillance system” — you click on the various cameras and get grainy black & white footage of the Stones in the studio, making the new album. Some of the cameras “don’t work.”

Anyway. It’s fun. And then you can also enter the main web site.

Tonight, Mick Jagger is going to be on late night TV, I guess introducing the new single from the upcoming album. Methinks I will not be awake, but I feel pretty certain I will get bombarded with it all over Instagram tomorrow morning…

Meanwhile, here’s this!

From 60 years ago… the original Rolling Stones:

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NewFest Pride announced their film line-up that will launch Pride Month in NYC.

There will be big outdoor screenings, but if you no longer live anywhere near NYC — you can get a virtual pass, and watch the films online.

There are many different options for purchasing passes to the screenings and parties and Q&A’s in NYC HERE.

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And by accident, last night I re-listened to chapters 12 -17 of The Dharma Bums on YouTube! I was listening to something else and trying to skip the ad, when it suddenly took me to a totally different video that I had listened to several months ago.

But I was quietly very happy with this twist of fate! I love that book. (Chapters 12 -17):

And I think maybe it was Jack, once again helping me make peace with the ever-upcoming release of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder and how it will likely be a book that won’t sit well with people….

Jack’s spirit is really good at helping me come to terms with that.

Jack Kerouac in Greenwich Village, NYC — looks like late 1940s or early 1950s.

I did get a really wonderful text from Wendy yesterday, saying she had finished reading the novel. It was difficult for her to get through (see yesterday’s post), but she liked how everything was resolved in the end.

And she also said: “If you don’t have a book launch, how will people know the book is out?”

Which, obviously, is a very good point…

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Okay. Well, on a somewhat different note!

Here’s this! So similar to yesterday!

Keith, drinking Jack Daniels onstage!

And so here’s the follow up to what I alluded to yesterday about my dad’s parenting skills in 1972:

I was 12, and closed up in my bedroom, as usual. I was always closed up in there, listening to music or playing my guitar and writing songs.

My dad came in and told me that my grandmother (his mother) had just called to tell him that Karen and I had been drinking whiskey and smoking cigarettes.

ME: “How’d she know about that?”

HE (laughing but trying hard not to show it): “You mean it’s true?”

ME: “Yeah. But how’d she know?”

HE: “She saw you. You weren’t doing a very good job of trying to hide it. Do you even like whiskey?!”

ME: “No, but Karen does.”

And then my dad went on to tell me that I was too young to drink whiskey and smoke cigarettes, and that if I was going to keep on doing it, I better try harder to not get caught.

HE: “If you do get caught again, then I’m gonna look like I can’t control my own daughter. And then I’m gonna get angry.”

It is sufficient to say that, forever after, I tried really hard not to get caught drinking whiskey and smoking cigarettes… the rest of the stuff I got up to, not so much.