The World Comes Home to Roost for the Moment…

Well, the Governor of this lofty State, as of last evening, mandated that all gathering places such as bars and restaurants all over Ohio are to be closed down, as he attempts to force stubborn people to stay home.

This means that me and my beloved Granville Inn — my home away from home, 25 miles from here — must part company for a while.

(Yes, I confess — I was there Saturday night with tons of other people and no less than 6 flat screen TVs, with the sound off, giving moment-by-moment updates of the National Emergency and the world-wide pandemic.)(To be fair, though, I was super paranoid about not touching my face and I washed my hands a lot…)

So, anyway, now I’m home for the duration. And instead of sitting at my desk and working almost all of the time, I am now going to sit at my desk and work all the time.

After I got word of the Governor’s mandate last evening, I figured I’d better force myself to drive into the other town (19 miles away) to get the upcoming week’s groceries. Just get it over with and then force myself to stay at home. (Although tomorrow is voting day and I can’t imagine not voting…)

I was bracing myself for a catastrophe inside the market — I had heard already that all the big super market chains had empty shelves and were out of food. However, the little market I shop at — that has tons of organic produce, etc. — still had plenty of food. And none of the shoppers there appeared to be in the throes of hoarding stuff.

The store was only out of 2 things that I normally buy (and I thought it was interesting that they were out of these specific items in this pandemic of shopping mania): the specific dark chocolate I like — and so I was forced to buy a type of dark chocolate that comes from Austria, instead, and that actually tastes better than what I usually buy and is indescribably delicious (meaning, it contains more sugar and less cocoa), so I’m going to be forced to eat delicious chocolate this week. And they were out of the organic pomegranate juice that I buy. Instead, I had to buy organic pomegranate juice that is blended with organic tart cherry and red grape juices (which, of course, tastes better than the pure stuff — but I drink the pure stuff for post-menopausal hormonal reasons, not because I like it). But, clearly, a lot of suffering is underway here…

And then, on the way back into Crazeysburg, I stopped at the dollar store to buy more tea tree essential oil and 25 pounds of cat litter, both of which they had plenty of (I have tried to warn you that my life is just super glamorous, gang), and then I thought — in a sort of somewhat hoarding sort of vein — that maybe I should just buy another carton of Breyer’s all natural vanilla bean ice cream — you know, in case I need to ponder excessively during the crack down and run out of the 1 and a 1/2 cartons I already have in my freezer. And to my dismay, I discovered that apparently everyone in Crazeysburg shares my taste in ice cream because they were all out of only that flavor. (I bought Breyer’s Neapolitan as my back-up instead.)

But I found that just so funny, you know? In the midst of all this utterly insane stupefyingly crazy shopping stuff that’s going on all over America now, the only things I couldn’t obtain were organic Pomegranate juice, high-cocoa-content dark chocolate, and boring Breyer’s all natural vanilla bean ice cream.

This means that there are people out here in the Hinterlands who are exactly like me and yet I don’t know a single one of them!

Well, the update on the web work for Abstract Absurdity Productions got even more bizarre. I did hear back from one of the “Happiness Engineers” yesterday (far short of the 24-48 hour estimated time frame) and she took care of the problem that I was having at WordPress, and then I was able to go back over to GoDaddy and discover that the problem they had allegedly fixed for me there on Saturday was now even worse. So, an hour and a half on the phone with tech support took care of that problem (for real, this time). And I was able to go back to my “Happiness Engineer” at WordPress and finish up everything there.

And then she happily informed me that we were all good to go and that within 5 to 7 days, I could complete the site set up.

Oh my god. You know? In case you can’t do the math on that, that’s, like, an entire week. I mean, the whole world has shut down, so it’s not like there’s any rush or anything, but it just boggles my mind.

Plus, it’s embarrassing to have to keep giving Peitor these ridiculous updates every day because I know that he must be privately thinking that I don’t really know how to set up a web site and that it’s just my foolish pride that’s preventing me from admitting it.

Well, anyway. I have a full tank of gas in my car that only cost me $1.83 per gallon. And I have all my groceries, and all the cat food and cat litter we need around here, and plenty of ice cream to try to mend my broken heart with — and I have absolutely no place to go and no web work that I can do. So I’m guessing I’ll get a lot of my own writing done this week.

We can only hope. Although my phone informed me yesterday that I’m spending way too much time on Instagram now. I usually have about 3 hours of screen time on my phone each week, but yesterday, my phone informed me that last week, I had 19 hours of screen time!! Jesus Christ. That is just stupid. I gotta stop. It only leads to heartache anyway. (For instance, I used to love that song “Love Letter” by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds and now I never want to hear it again, ever, as long as I live, ever, and even beyond forever, because of something I scrolled my way on to on Instagram a few dawns ago. Stupid stuff like that.)






Okay. I guess I’ll get started here. Have a good Monday, wherever you are in this pandemic-filled world. Find something peaceful to contemplate. Find something to follow that leads you in the direction of joy. Thanks for visiting, gang. I leave you with my little soundtrack to have your heart broken by, as we barrel ever-onward towards Spring. I love you guys. See ya!

“Swinging Doors”

This old smoke-filled bar is something I’m not used to
But I gave up my home to see you satisfied
And I just called to let you know where I’ll be living
It’s not much but I feel welcome here inside

And I’ve got swinging doors a jukebox and a bar stool
And my new home has a flashing neon sign
Stop by and see me anytime you want to
Cause I’m always here at home till closing time

I’ve got everything I need to drive me crazy
I’ve got everything it takes to lose my mind
And in here the atmosphere’s just right for heartaches
And thanks to you I’m always here till closing time

And I’ve got swinging doors a jukebox and a bar stool
And my new home has a flashing neon sign
Stop by and see me anytime you want to
Cause I’m always here at home till closing time

Yeah, I’m always here at home till closing time

© 1966 Merle Haggard

2 thoughts on “The World Comes Home to Roost for the Moment…”

  1. Some interesting thoughts on the’ current unpleasantness’. Plenty of people in the world are going toilet-paperless at the moment. I also filled up my juice-tank up today — but at the equiv. of $7.50 a gallon!

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