TGIS!!

Yes, Thank God It’s Sunday.

I sort of have the day off, if you don’t include spending the entire day either working on Sandra’s bio/resume, and/or working with her, later, over the phone…

At least I don’t have to drive 50 miles, and put on my happy/helpful face, and find the energy to genuinely be nice to people for 7-9 hours, while being utterly exhausted and thoroughly preoccupied, and trying really hard to convince myself to just hang on…

When, when, when, right? When is that full disclosure coming? When will the big shift finally, well, shift?

It gets so hard to even get out of bed in the morning. The overwhelming fatigue from 3 years of it. Even though I don’t report on very much of it on the blog anymore, I haven’t left the movement; I still stay on top of the channels, the podcasts, the updates. The waiting is almost as exhausting as all the reporting was. (Almost.)

Not having to get out of bed and do anything but feed the cats at least helps me actually get out of bed.

So, yay for Sunday…

This morning, “Nancy Drew” posted this and I am definitely one of those people she is talking about. So, in the event that you are, too — here is what she said. It might help:

As far as “the job” goes, I really don’t have any complaints. It’s just the physical need to be present there, when there is so much other stuff that could use my attention, my creativity, my energy — that, plus all the driving– that’s what exhausts me.

One nice thing that has developed, strangely enough: quite a few of the customers from the health food store have discovered that I’m now working at the train station. (Different towns, but right next to each other.)

So not only do I make cocktails for people, I answer their questions about somewhat obscure health supplements or about which naturopaths or holistic doctors in the area are getting the best results for people and why, etc. And I’m still trying to help people (women, especially) reclaim their bodies & their minds after having gotten the MRNAs.

It is incredibly satisfying, when they come back to tell me, “Oh my god, Marilyn, that stuff is actually working.”

Obviously, I don’t mind doing that. All the information is still right there in my head. But I’d always rather be at home, working on 2 particular novels-in-progress — both books extremely transgressive — that, with any luck, will long outlive me and act as a further warning to humanity to never, ever, ever let this happen again.

And when I think of the enormity of what “this” has been , I just want to lay down and die. The evil that humanity is capable of, over and over and over– most of all, nowadays, to its children — and the amount of people, the world over, who are oblivious to it and who just think it’s normal now to doubt the existence of a higher creative force (often called “God”), without having a clue that this was done to them systematically…

Talk about opening that Nietzschean door to let evil just walk on in. (Jettison morality; kill God, and you get to allow everything with a shrug and just go about your business.)

Anyway. On an oddly similar note…

This was very interesting yesterday. If you study the history of the Bible and not just the theology of it, there are all sorts of other horrors to consider that come under the banner of “God.” (When people say that they follow the Bible, live their lives by it, I right away wonder: Wow. Have you ever actually read it??)

Anyway. Worth one hour of your time.

Ross K. Nichols – Sacrifice: A Dogma of Death (1 hr):

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Okay.

The laundry is done and I’m going to get back to work on sorting out Sandra’s incredible bio.

Enjoy your Sunday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Another great one from my Top 23+3 Entire Albums list of Nick Cave’s best!

“Train Long Suffering,” 1985. From the Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds album, The First Born is Dead. Enjoy!

“Train-Long Suffering”

Woo-wooooooo Woo!
In the name of pain!
(In the name of pain and suffering)
In the name of pain!
(In the name of pain and suffering)
There comes a train!
(There comes a train)
Yeah!
A long black train
(There comes a train)
Lord, a long black train

Woo-woo! Woo-woo!

Punched from the tunnel
(The tunnel of love is long and lonely)
Engines steaming like a fist
(A fistful of memories)
Into the jolly jaw of morning
(Yeah! O yeah!)
O baby it gets smashed!
(You know that it gets smashed)
O baby it gets smashed!
(You know that it gets smashed)

I kick every goddamn splinter
Into all the looking eyes in the world
Into all the laughing eyes
Of all the girls in the world
Oooooo-woooooh
She ain’t never comin back
She ain’t never comin back
She ain’t never comin back
She ain’t never comin back
And the name of the pain is…
And the name of the pain is…
And the name of the pain is…
And the name of the pain is…
The name of the pain is
A train long-suffering

On rails of pain
(On rails of pain and suffering)
There comes a train
(There comes a train long-suffering)
On rails of pain
(On rails of pain and suffering)
O baby blow its whistle in the rain

Woo-oo Woo! Woo-oo Woo!

Who’s the engine driver?
(The engine drivers over yonder)
His name is Memory
(His name is Memory)
O Memory is his name
(Woooooo-wo!)
Destination: Misery
(Pain and misery)
O pain and misery
(Pain and misery)
O pain and misery
Hey! Hey!
(Pain and misery)
Hey! That’s a sad lookin sack!
Oooh that’s a sad lookin sack!
And the name of the pain is…
And the name of the pain is…
Ooh the name of the pain is
A train long-suffering

There is a train!
(It’s got a name)
Yeah! It’s a train long-suffering
O Lord a train!
(A long black train)
Lord! Of pain and suffering
Each night so black
(O yeah! So black)
And in the darkness of my sack
I’m missing you baby
(I’m missing you)
And I just dunno what to do
(dunno what to do)
(Train long-suffering)
(Train long-suffering)
(Train long-suffering)
(Train long-suffering)
O she ain’t never comin back
O she ain’t never comin back
O she ain’t never comin back
O she ain’t never comin back
And the name of the pain is…
And the name of the pain is…
The name of the train is…
The name of the train is
Pain and suffering