You know, chocolate ice cream is a drug (see last night’s post). And drugs won’t solve your problems, or make them go away. Drugs only help you pretend that you’ve got it all under control. But like all good drugs, ice cream eventually wears off. Then what are you stuck with?
My whole day (and night) was just totally fucked yesterday. Jesus. I wish I could just get a grip on my brain, you know?
The chocolate ice cream worked for a little while. I was feeling pretty pleased with everything. Yeah, like, this ice cream thing was gonna work. But I got into bed feeling a little iffy, like maybe the ice cream was wearing off; like maybe I should take another hit before going to sleep…but that meant I’d have to go back down to the kitchen, maybe even have to wash my bowl and my spoon again. Then brush my teeth again, so that the sugary ice cream residue wasn’t burrowing little holes into my teeth while I slept.
Should I just stick it out? Get another happiness hit? What to do, what to do…
I give you the soundtrack from last night in bed.
Not so terrible, at first. Kinda really sweet and beautiful:
And it slowly mutated into this; still not unmanageable:
Then it wandered down a little side street into this (getting a little needy around midnight – 1am):
Oops, then it got a wee bit intense and went into some very dicey territory indeed. Clearly the ice cream was on its last legs:
Sadly, by 3:28am we were right back at square one, absolutely needing another fix…
And then I was awake for the rest of the goddamned night.
(And it all started out yesterday with this):
All righty, gang!!!!! I seriously gotta get crackin’ around here. I am so fucking behind schedule now, you have no idea. But thanks for visiting! I love you guys. See ya!