Tag Archives: Nick Cave Red Hand Files

Getting A Late Start Here!

August 11, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I am a little late posting to the blog this morning, so this will be a brief post (I think!).

The kittens had me up late — as soon as I got off my 2 and a 1/2 hour phone call with Dennis, they got an attack of the zoomies!!

And since the bedroom was closed up because the AC was on, it was sort of like the zoomies from Hell! They were zooming all over the place, including constantly pouncing on ME.

I finally had to put all of them out into the hall and sleep totally ALONE. Yay.

HOWEVER!!

I’m glad I got to the blog late because Nick Cave just now sent out a Red Hand File and it’s one of those ones that I just LOVE!! Wherein he answers 50 questions with basically “yes, no, I don’t know, go fuck yourself”!!

My favorite:

“Do you really want to tell us about a girl, still?”

“Yes”

There are a lot of good ones, though (let’s say 50!!). You can read them HERE.

And I LOVE this photo from today’s FILE (Nick and Roland):

And speaking of wanting (or not wanting) to tell us about a girl… Here’s this (again) — “From Her To Eternity” in Wim Wenders’ “Wings of Desire”:

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Okay!

After I posted to the blog yesterday, I realized it was Marlon Richards’ birthday!! Again! (Keith Richards’ son.)

He has one every year, like clockwork, and the years are fucking FLYING, gang!! He used to be about 3, and now he’s FIFTY-FOUR!!!

Here’s the photo his wife posted to Instagram yesterday:

And here are the photos Keith posted yesterday:

And here’s one of my personal favorites of Keith and Marlon from my wee bonny girlhood!

And here’s this!

From Instagram yesterday! Wherein Keith was a lot younger than Marlon is NOW!

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Okay!!

Is this what il donaldo trumpo was posting about yesterday?? Or at least PART of what he was posting about?? (“We’re gonna need more popcorn this week”?) (FYI — typos matter; it’s a Q thing)

DEPLOYING THE NATIONAL GUARD IN OUT NATION’S CAPITAL!!!😎🇺🇸⚡️⚡️⚡️ —TIME TO DRAIN THE SWAMP!!!

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Okay, yesterday was intense. I can’t say why because I can’t talk about the private medical stuff of my clients. But it was intense.

However, we DID watch some great TV, including the movie “Superman 2”. (From June 1981)

Not that it was a great movie, really, but I instantly remembered seeing that movie in a theater in Times Square, not too far from our apartment in the Camelot Building (on W.45th Street and 8th Ave), when I was newly married to Chong Foun Kee.

I can’t remember if he went to that movie with me, or if I was with one of my friends. But yesterday, I found it so interesting that I remembered so vividly being in the theater, and that it was in Times Square, even while I remembered next to nothing about the actual movie.

God, I loved living in NYC back then.

This song still brings tears to my eyes, even though it was about something entirely different — it still captures my world back then, when we lived in the Camelot Building — even including all the drugs, booze, insane sex, all the music clubs, all the wonderfully gifted people I knew back then, and all of us were in our 20s:

"CAMELOT"

A law was made a distant moon ago here:
July and August cannot be too hot.
And there's a legal limit to the snow here
In Camelot.
The winter is forbidden till December
And exits March the second on the dot.
By order, summer lingers through September
In Camelot.

Camelot! Camelot!
I know it sounds a bit bizarre,
But in Camelot, Camelot
That's how conditions are.
The rain may never fall till after sundown.
By eight, the morning fog must disappear.
In short, there's simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Camelot.

Camelot! Camelot!
I know it gives a person pause,
But in Camelot, Camelot
Those are the legal laws.
The snow may never slush upon the hillside.
By nine p.m. the moonlight must appear.
In short, there's simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Camelot.

*****************

Okay, I guess I better scoot or I’m gonna be late.

I have to work today because my favorite nearly-95-year-old Japanese client’s private nurse needed the day off.

Enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys! See ya!

I Know, I Know!!

July 29, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I’m late again!

This time, it wasn’t because I went back to sleep after breakfast –tempting as the idea was.

However.

MANY kittens and a couple of cats saw to it that “going back to sleep” was merely a pipe dream… (if I can sort of delightfully mix metaphors there and include opium in the heady mix!) (pipe dream — smoking opium, etc.)

Mainly, though, I took a walk over to the post office to collect a registered letter that contained belated birthday wishes AND cash money!!! Yay!!! “Happy Birthday”, indeed!

But I am here now!

And I have no more contractors coming. I am waiting on 2 remaining price quotes to be emailed to me, then I can mail the whole application off to my local USDA RD office and hope that they haven’t already run out of money for the season. We shall see, gang!!

I’m not asking for much, but the few things I do want fixed around here would really upgrade the safety of this beautiful old house.

**************

All right. Well.

YES! On the eHarmony front —

We talked for THREE hours last night. And I’m guessing we could have talked on and on, if it weren’t for the fact that I now, more than ever, need my beauty sleep!!

Because we ARE, indeed, meeting for lunch on Thursday. And I’d like to look a little bit better than in this memorable photo!

(Me, in my hotel room bed in NYC, 3 weeks ago, at 5:03 AM) (And ditching the nightgown and wearing a sundress instead will likely be a big help!) (Oh! I might comb my hair, too!)

And in case you’re wondering where we’re meeting for lunch…

YES! Why wouldn’t we meet here? I always wanna go here!

The super glamorous Tequilaville!!

Even though I like the food at Tequilaville — only because it’s better than any other Mexican restaurant I’ve tried around here (which qualifies as “damning with faint praise”) — it turns out that my new friend lived in Texas for 3 years… so. You know. No comparison to Texas Mexican food. But, well, we’re a long way from Texas. We gotta make do with what we have out here in the Hinterlands.

(I know, I know. That’s kinda like “writing about him” which I’m not supposed to do…)

**********

Okay.

New topic!

A brief excerpt from a recent interview with James Tabor.

And this is the very topic (or quest, as it were) that caused me to decide to continue studying Jesus the man, rather than pursuing a congregation of my own after I graduated from Divinity School and became an ordained minister.

How Historical Methods Get us Closer to the Real Jesus (8 mins):

****************

I’m making some little strides here with The Curse of Our Profound Disorder, but I’m at a point where a few very important storylines come to a resolution (and the novel itself comes to a close), so it takes an unbelievable amount of concentration.

Thank God, yet again, for that AC, gang. At least I can think. Slow as the process currently is. (I hope I don’t get to the final paragraph and then discover that I need another 26 years to properly finish it….)

***************

All righty.

Nick Cave sent out a Red Hand File this morning.

Apparently it is FORTY YEARS (!!) since the amazing masterpiece, “Tupelo”, was released by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds.

How I love that song, gang. I will never forget the first time I heard it, in my tiny little hellhole apartment on E. 12th Street.

In fact, I will never forget riding the PATH train from Hoboken NJ (where I had bought the album The First Born Is Dead in a small record shop) back into Manhattan, and reading the lyrics to “Tupelo” that were printed on the back of the album cover. The lyrics blew me away. I couldn’t wait to get home and play the record.

I loved the whole record (it was my first exposure to Nick Cave), but I particularly loved that song “Tupelo”. I was astounded by it. And, as I’ve posted here before, every single person who came into that apartment after that, was forced to listen to “Tupelo” on the record player in my tiny, godforsaken, hellhole bedroom!!

ME: “Have you heard this song yet??”

EVERYONE ELSE IN MY APARTMENT: “No.”

ME: “Listen to it!! It’s incredible!! It’s about Elvis!”

Well, in honor of the 40th anniversary of this song, a filmmaker friend of Nick Cave’s created a video using Artificial Intelligence, which, as you know, I am not a huge fan of. (That’s a nice way of saying “I despise AI and whoever invented it should be publicly executed in a 1984 doomsday sort of way…”)

Anyway. You can of course watch the video yourself and come to your own conclusions, as I include it here! But I did not like it at all. I found it incredibly creepy and just sort of a violation of so many images from Elvis’s career that, at this point, are practically sacred to me.

I think I’d rather be forced to watch the eye scene in Luis Buñuel’s “Un Chien Andalou” than watch that “Tupelo” video ever again.

But, alas, that is only my over-reactionary opinion and I’m guessing not many people share it.

So, here it is, for your viewing pleasure:

And here is what I much prefer — the audio, as I heard it 40 years ago:

**************

And on that lofty note!!

I suppose I better get started around here.

Have a terrific Tuesday wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys! See ya!

**************

I leave you with this gem!!

Merle Haggard and Marty Robbins do a great duet of the all-out C&W classic by George Jones, “She Thinks I Still Care”. (1970) Enjoy, gang!!

She thinks I still care

Just because I asked a friend about her
Just because I spoke her name somewhere
Just because I rang her number by mistake today
She thinks I still care

Just because I haunt the same old places
Where the memory of her lingers everywhere
Just because I'm not the happy guy I used to be
She thinks I still care

But if she's happy thinking I still need her
Then let that silly notion bring her cheer
But how could she ever be so foolish
Oh were would she get such an idea

Just because I asked a friend about her
Just because I spoke her name somewhere
Just because I saw her then went all to pieces
She thinks I still care
She thinks I still care

 c- 1962 Dickey Lee / Steve Duffy

A Perfect Morning, All Things Considered

July 14, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I slept TOTALLY alone in the guest room last night, the windows open, the door closed, a couple of fans going.

Complete peace.

No cats or kittens disturbing me. At all.

And I slept for 8 beautiful hours.

AND…

This morning — a really gentle, wonderful RAIN. For several hours, already. It’s 72 degrees Fahrenheit right now, and only expected to reach 82 today. Yay.

AND….

I have the next 2 days off (as of right now, anyway). So I get to sit at my desk and work on all the various nips & tucks we made to the play last week in NYC.

So it’s a perfect day.

Of course, losing Little Blackie so unexpectedly yesterday hangs over us, but oddly enough — I think she was here with her kittens this morning because they suddenly reached a turning point in their independence.

Even little Billie Jo! The kitten who’s missing her 2 back feet.

This morning, I went into the family room to set the food bowls down for my own cats — meaning the dwindling colony of rescued ferals who’ve been with me now for 13 years — and who did I spy in the family room???

YES.

ALL 4 of the kittens had finally come down the stairs and were leaping about, darting happily around the room.

I could not believe that even Billie Jo had made it down the stairs, all by herself. All 4 of them raced all over, exploring everything, and even had their own breakfasts downstairs in the family room, too.

The other cats were not thrilled with this development, but I am so glad this has happened. It means that, little by little, my room will be my own again and I will be able to do things like yoga, without having kittens all over me. Yay!!!

So this is a great day for all of us, and I can’t help but feel convinced that Little Blackie’s spirit was part of this sudden shift today.

*****************

Even though, yesterday, I was just a bag of frayed nerves and raw emotions, I still had to work my shift. But it went really well.

I was with the retired Minister and his wife again — I hadn’t been there in 2 weeks and it seemed like he has continued to make such great progress. He was alert, focused, and in such good spirits the whole evening.

With this particular client there’s nothing I really need to do except chat with him and provide companionship, because the wife does all the “caregiving” work. (It’s complicated medical stuff that I’m not legally allowed to do.)

So I sat there in their air-conditioned family room and chatted with them, and then watched the entire NASCAR Sonoma race. And then left.

And I got paid for that. Not only paid, but it was Sunday, so I also get paid the “Sunday” amount, which is higher than the weekday pay.

So I can’t really complain, even though, emotionally, witnessing the whole aging thing is still a lot for me to process. On top of feeling all that grief over Little Blackie, yesterday, that I couldn’t talk about.

It was still okay. But I am really, really rejoicing in this rainy Monday morning, day-off thing here today.

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I forgot to mention this, regarding my trip to NYC….

Remember those sundresses??? Wow, were they a big hit. So many compliments.

And just in general, I have to say that everyone — especially the men, regardless of age, ethnicity or religion — treated me so nice on that trip. I especially loved the men, holding doors open for me, saying hello, smiling.

This was everywhere I went. NO ONE AT ALL treated me like I was their grandmother!! Yay!! (Yes, I’m old enough to be a grandmother and yes, most of my friends from high school are grandmothers now, several times over, but I’M NOT ONE!!!!!)

Anyway.

So different from how things are around here in the Hinterlands. People are really friendly around here, but everyone basically regards me as “old”. So it was a really incredible change of pace.

I have to add that this dress, in particular, was probably the best thing I’ve purchased all year!! This dress, in real life, is just incredibly pretty. And it’s like wearing a flowing piece of air!

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On a more somber note–

Today marks ten years since Nick Cave’s son Arthur died. His Red Hand File today was devoted to his thoughts and feelings about that.

For some reason, it has not been posted on the web site yet, so I can’t link to it. But I can quote the email —

“These days, I am neither distrustful nor suspicious of the world, even though my heart breaks for it, and I am not despairing, depressed or embittered. Indeed, I see heartbreak as the most proportional response to the state of the world – to say I love you is to say my heart breaks for you, and this sentiment resonates within all things, bringing a clarity to both the world before us and the world beyond the veil. Sorrow becomes a way of life, part laughter, part tears, with very little space between. It is a way of conducting oneself in the world, of loving it, of worshipping it….”

And Wednesday, Nick Cave’s Solo Tour with Colin Greenwood on bass resumes — in Mantova, Italy. Tickets are still available for this show only. You can buy them here.

And here’s this! From Instagram.

From the Bad Seeds show in San Francisco , back in May.

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And I just wanted to give a quick “thank you” again to everyone who’s downloading my eBooks over at Smashwords, during that Summer Sale!!

I really appreciate it (Freak Parade seems to be outpacing the Muse Revisited Collection!)

Details are on my substack page, if you’re interested in the sale. All of my eBook titles with Smashwords are FREE to download for the month of July. ADULTS ONLY. Graphic erotic literature.

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Okay, gang. I’m going to get started around here.

Enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world! (It looks like the value of silver is already inching up this morning, so this could be the start of a wild summer. We shall see!!)

Thanks for visiting, gang.

I love you guys. See ya!!

****************

Me! And a New York City from long ago!! Enjoy, gang.

Try It Real Slow

Driving in the dead of night
Coasting through a traffic light
Aiming for a back road
Where we could park it for the night
Thinking we would make it sober and
Try it real slow.

There’s music on the radio
Screaming bunch of white boys
Churning out the Black soul
But turning it to white noise
Well, we could learn to make it sober by
Trying real slow.

CHORUS
Any disappointed stranger will tell you
Love is just a ball & chain
Oh but baby you’re the kind of man
That I like to talk to

You can play the wine & dine
Pick yourself a pretty wife
Gather all that you can hold
Then drag it round your whole life
Or you could learn to make it sober by
Trying real slow

REPEAT CHORUS

I turned it over, round and round
Chasing it the hard way
Until my dreams were just a white line
Sailing down the Interstate;
Well, love was gonna shake me sober
But I didn’t let it grow.

REPEAT CHORUS

Oh, but you and me will be all right
By letting every yesterday
Go fading with the taillights
Sailing down the highway
And we can learn to make it sober
By trying real slow.

Yeah, we can learn to make it sober
By trying real slow

© 1984 Marilyn Jaye Lewis
First of May Songs, BMI

Totally NOT Me Today!

July 5, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Jeepers McCreepers, gang. The kittens just won’t quit this morning.

Can you say:

“Jesus fucking Christ, do NOT tell me you just knocked over my ENTIRE cup of Coffeeee!!!!”

“Jesus fucking Christ, will you STOP chewing on my phone charging cord??!!” (times 4)

“Jesus fucking Christ, who the fuck just THREW UP??!!”

That’s a little bit of what it’s been like around here this morning — in my room. The rest of the housecats are as quiet as little mice.

I had so much extra time this morning and I was planning on really just relaxing in bed with my cup of coffee before heading out for my shift.

But I had to switch over to Plan B and I have no real clue what Plan B is…

**********

Anyway.

Yesterday turned out to be reasonably okay, regarding having to work a double on the 4th of July.

My 94-year-old Japanese man and I will go get sushi/sashimi today, because Peony Bistro was indeed closed for the holiday yesterday. But we had a nice time just hanging out in his air- conditioned living room, chatting about Hong Kong, Tokyo, NYC — and all his many memories from the past.

And, as always, my shift with the woman who has returned from Florida flew by in a nano second. I left there just as fireworks were getting ready to start all over the place. (And I even got to see some fireworks as I was pulling up into Crazeysburg — one of my neighbors was putting on a really impressive show in his backyard.)

So, I’m just trying to face forward, you know? And hope that things come together soon and I can stop having to work on holidays, and I can start just sitting at my desk again and writing everyday.

***************

Nick Cave sent out a Red Hand File yesterday about his songwriting process. It was very interesting — and very different from any songwriting process I ever experienced. He said, in part:

“The hard part for me, the most agonising and uncertain part, the part that keeps me up at night and makes me a complete pain in the arse through the day, is in the initial creation. That is, the unpredictable arrival of those first two lines….”

You can read it in full here.

And don’t forget!!

Tonight and tomorrow night in Paris!! TWO sold out shows, neither of which can you attend if you don’t already have your precious ticket!! Alas…

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Okay. I don’t have much to post about today. I’m not only focused on trying to get my suitcase packed as minimally as possible, I am also a little out of sorts mentally, since my prized morning Cup o’ Joe ended up all over my night table AND all over 3 brand new books!!!

But here’s what I’m grateful for– the coffee didn’t spill all over me in the bed, and the coffee mug didn’t break… because I only have about 17 million other coffee mugs to choose from…

I’m going to be out of here early tomorrow morning, in that Uber heading to the airport (an hour from here), but I will probably post something from my hotel tomorrow evening.

Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*****************

Not me this morning… but it’s something to aim for.

A song I have LOVED since the very first moment I heard it on my AM radio.

Enjoy, gang!

The Eagles. “Peaceful Easy Feeling”, 1972.

“You’d think she’d be better at this, right? I mean, I’m just saying…”

June 24, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Glory hallelujah, gang! As if I didn’t need more on my plate!!

“Yes, please, I’ll have some more!”

Something caught my eye this morning that alerted me to these new facts:

Bobbi Jo is, in fact, Bobby Joe.

And Betty Jo needs a new name…. Arrrgggh!

Since my beloved 2-legged Billie Jo is still indeed a female, I guess I have to give her name to Betty and now Betty will be Billy Joe. (Or I could just call them all by the same name. I don’t think they will ever know the difference.)

But there we have it! I’m going to have a summer full of expensive visits to the new veterinarian! And here I’d thought I only had one (neutered) male in the house and could take all the time I wanted…

“Why does it take so long for those 2 little things to show up?”

Oh, and another happy thing!!!

My upstairs bathtub drain is completely backed up. Nothing accents a house full of overwhelming heat and humidity like a tub full of stagnant water!!

Well, I’m planning to remove the water. But I really, really, really don’t want to call a plumber…. I ordered a Zip-It. So we’ll see, although I don’t feel too encouraged. A (hopefully really, really good-looking) plumber is likely in my immediate future, too.

***************

Good news, though! Yay!

After posting that photo I took of the poor heat-stroked kittens (see the end of yesterday’s post), I did finally open the bedroom door yesterday. I propped a box fan in the doorway, and stacked some hard cover books precariously on top of the fan, in the event that any cats wanted to try sailing over the top of the fan, in either direction.

Well, it worked! I only had one cat try to get into my room yesterday afternoon, and the books and fan tumbled noisily to the floor and it scared the bejeezus out of him — and all the other cats & kittens! And so that took care of that. No one else tried it.

Now, the kittens and the Mommy-cat stay in the room, and the other cats stay out. And we all get some air circulating in here, finally!!

Today is supposed to be the final day of the actual heatwave. And I have to say, gang — you know me and my conspiracy theorist friends!! There is something truly strange about this heatwave. 93 degrees Fahrenheit isn’t usually this unbearable.

The summer temperatures here have always gone into the 90s at some point, but it never felt like this. (And, add to that, the White Hat WWIII scenario, pushing people to the “boiling point”… hmmm.)

Anyway. It’s not just me thinking stuff like this.

Valerie in Brooklyn texted yesterday and said, “What the fuck is going on with this weather?? What are they doing to us now?? We always have heat in NYC in the summer, but it’s nothing like this. I can’t even breathe.”

Well, I digress a bit.

Today is the final day of the heatwave, although the weather won’t be really enjoyable until the middle of next week. But just getting these temperatures out of the 90s will be such a relief. (And I’m not talking about music or fashion, because, you know, the 90s were kinda cool — if I can mix metaphors all over the place.)

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Okay!

The shooting range sent out an email this morning, a reminder that a new shooting club starts there today. So I won’t be going to the range today, either. All the lanes will be filled up during the time when I usually go.

And it means I won’t be going to town to visit those clients who are in rehab until maybe Thursday.

Which means ANOTHER day to sit and work on the novel!! Yay!!

What a blessing, gang. To suddenly have all this time (unbearably hot as it’s been) to sit and work on the novel. It has been such a long time. And FYI — all the sections and songs we will be working on for the rehearsals of the play (in 2 weeks!!!) are already completed. So I get to just truly focus on the novel. It feels so great.

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Nick Cave sent out a really incredible Red Hand File this morning. At least, it moved me a whole lot. Even though he was referencing what he does spiritually to prepare to go on stage (and then blow people the fuck away!), it resonated with me so much — how it feels to go into my clients’ homes and face life, mortality, love, loss, the quality of being human — and all the people from my own past and from my clients’ pasts who “show up” in spirit and spend time with us while I’m there.

He said, in part:

“…I appeal to these individuals, and many more, much like a devout person might petition the saints for assistance. I remember all these people and I feel a deep spiritual empowerment, so that when I take to the stage, I am carried along by this unearthly fraternity and their special powers. For me, this is an immense strength – an energy that illuminates what is truly meaningful and what is not. Communing with the dead is, in that respect, as clarifying an exercise as anything can be. We are quickly reminded of what matters and what does not. …”

You can read it in full here.

[Below, a photo of an old friend of Nick’s who just passed away.]

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All righty!

Laundry got done yesterday. And the light housecleaning got done, too! And the backed-up water can sit in the tub for now (I have another shower downstairs), so this means I’m going to get back to The Curse of Our Profound Disorder.

Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

******************

Blast from the 90s past, gang!

“Pass the Dutchie”, 1995, from the album Thump’ N Reggae Jamz by Musical Youth. Stay cool and enjoy, gang!!

Everything from now on is gonna be weird!!

June 16, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

My life has just gotten so strange, gang. But not in a bad way.

It stems mostly from joy. So much beautiful stuff in my world right now, but the “weird” part is that I had to get old before any of this could happen.

Well, most of it.

This first thing has nothing to do with age — the Agency texted to say that my favorite client, the woman who is now back from Florida and who has all those Theology Degrees from Yale Divinity School, has an open shift for today and did I want it?

Yes!! Thank you!!

So, even though it’s my day off, and even though I will also be seeing her on Thursday, I was more than happy to get started seeing her again as soon as possible.

So I’m spending the afternoon with her today, for the first time in 8 months. She has physical issues, obviously, or she wouldn’t need a caregiver round-the-clock, but it’s her mind that I really, really love. So we will soon see how it goes!

***************

Okay!

It is, of course, the novel-in-progress that is primarily consuming my life right now. And after working on it yesterday (The Curse of Our Profound Disorder) I realized two important things:

I absolutely could not have written this novel if I had started it today because I wouldn’t have had any clear memories of most of the stuff that is the crux of this book.
I couldn’t have COMPLETED the novel 26 years ago — when I first began writing it. Because I needed to get this far in life to be able to stand back and discern how it needs to end.

And since I believe both of those statements to be true, it makes me wonder “who” is really behind this novel? Me? A younger me? An older me? A “me” that’s set apart from anything physical that ages at all?

It’s a really profound feeling, whatever it’s pointing to. And in a way, it almost feels like I was in a whole other realm of existence these last 26 years, and now I’ve suddenly “come back”.

Whatever is going on here, it is a really beautiful thing. It gives me a chance to look at my entire life in a different way.

And, oddly enough, there is an undercurrent to the novel that is similar to “The Guide to Being Fabulous.” Even though, that play, is the story of Sandra’s life, not mine.

I can’t really put my finger on it yet, but there is just something really beautiful going on here, creatively, with both of these intense projects, after all these years, landing on my plate again at once.

[There is a new excerpt from The Curse of Our Profound Disorder on my substack page today, if you are interested. Mature readers only.]

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Nick Cave sent out a really beautiful Red Hand File this morning. He answers a few different questions this time, but all of them address that quality of being human in some way. I really loved it. It’s hard to really quote from it without reposting the entire thing! But here’s this:

“…Certain music has the ability, at least temporarily, to fill that void, making us feel whole and less abandoned. We feel complete when we listen to music we love, while being guided towards the goodness of things…”

You can read it in full HERE.

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Okay. That’s really it for now. I want to get a few things done before heading out to my client.

I hope you enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys, See ya!

**************

After posting that video yesterday of Joan Baez singing the Steve Earle song, “Jerusalem”, it reminded me of how much I used to love Steve Earle’s music!! I used to play his CDs all the time in NYC!!

I am conflicted, though! Which one to post here??? So I will probably post a few of them this coming week.

For now — “The Devil’s Right Hand”, from the album Copperhead Road, 1988. How many times have I played this song in my wee bonny lifetime??? I have no clue!! What a great song.

Enjoy, gang!!

“The Devil’s Right Hand”

‘Bout the time my daddy left to fight the big war
I saw my first pistol in a general store
In a general store, when I was 13
Thought it was the finest thing I ever had seen

Asked if I could have one someday, when I grew up
Mama dropped a dozen eggs, she really blew up
She really blew up, I didn’t understand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”

The devil’s right hand, the devil’s right hand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”

My very first pistol was a cap and ball Colt
Shoot as fast as lightnin’, but she loads a mite slow
Loads a mite slow as I soon found out
It can get you into trouble, but it can’t get you out

So then I went and bought myself a Colt 45
Called a Peacemaker, but I never knew why
Never knew why, I didn’t understand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”

The devil’s right hand, the devil’s right hand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”
The devil’s right hand, the devil’s right hand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”

Well, I got into a card game, in a company town
Caught a miner cheating, I shot the dog down
Shot the dog down, I watched the man fall
Never touched his holster, never had a chance to draw

My trial was in the morning, and they dragged me out of bed
Asked me how I pleaded, “Not guilty, ” I said
“Not guilty, ” I said, “You’ve got the wrong man”
Nothing touched the trigger but the devil’s right hand

The devil’s right hand, the devil’s right hand
Mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”
The devil’s right hand, the devil’s right hand
Nothing touched the trigger but the devil’s right hand

My mama said, “The pistol is the devil’s right hand”

c – 1983- Stephen F. Earle

“I’ve heard that thing about a day making a difference and all, but this is like night & day…”

June 2, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Wow, gang!!

I slept great. My wee bonny peepers didn’t pop open until 5:28 AM!! The sun was coming up! It felt incredible, knowing I didn’t need to spring out of bed; didn’t need to go anywhere or do anything today unless I wanted to…

And it turns out — I want to!!

Me and Wendy and Kara are meeting up in Granville, later, to either have a late lunch or an early dinner and I am so excited!!

Not only because I get to hang out with them (yay!!), but also the weather is going to be fantastic!! Sunny. Upper-70s Fahrenheit. Which means I get to wear one of my new sun dresses. And sandals. So I’m finally going to paint my toenails!!

I usually keep them painted from May through September, but it’s been so cold and rainy this Spring, that I haven’t bothered. Until today… Yay!

************

Okay.

A Happy Heavenly Birthday to Charlie Watts!!

I know people really like Steve Jordan, and I know Keith loves playing with him a lot. I have nothing against Steve Jordan, but for me, it’s just not the Stones sound without Charlie.

**********

Another happy thing about today, gang — I’m gonna go outside for a bit and pull some weeds, and then get the pots and stands and flowerboxes out of the barn and ready for when I buy the flowers and put them all out on the porches.

One step closer, gang! It makes my heart sing.

*****************

Oh, and speaking of making my heart sing…

The other day, when I was in Rural King, there was a guy working the register that I’d never seen before, but it was clear he’d worked there a long time, just not on the register.

I was going to his lane but the customer in front of me had a lot of items, so I moved to the next lane, instead. But his lane freed up right away, so he actually called me back over.

“Come on, ” he said, waving. “I’m free.”

You don’t usually see that kind of enthusiasm in a checkout lane, least of all from a guy. So I went right over.

Let me say here that I am absolutely 100% old enough to be his grandmother… but, wow, was this guy totally my type.

The kind of long-haired, tall, dark, skinny guy that you can tell is nothing but trouble when he’s not on the clock. The kind of guy who would have driven a race car way too fast back in the old days. While smoking. You know, a wild thing.

And when he asked me what my “rewards” number was, and I told it to him, he stared right at me, while entering the numbers into the register — he never had to look down at the keyboard once and he got it completely right. “Marilyn?” he said. And then he sort of flirted with me … but not too much.

And , yes, my heart sang!

Shit! I couldn’t believe God still made guys like him!!! Wow. What a great day at the Rural King.

[Tom Petty & the Heart breakers, “Wild Thing ( You Make My Heart Sing)”, 1982]

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Nick Cave sent out a really beautiful Red Hand File this morning, affirming the value of having children, regardless of the state of the world at any given time. In part, he said:

“...I think that if we are to attribute any value to the future of the world and invest in its continuance, we must keep on populating it. Children are indicators of our faith in the world itself, they are emissaries of optimism, charging into the future with their pockets full of hope…“

You can read it in full here.

***************

And what finally happens one week from tomorrow???

That’s right!! ~~A mandatory meeting at the Agency to get new uniforms~~ NO!!! Nick Cave’s Solo Tour of Europe (with bass player) begins!! It is mostly sold out, but buy those few remaining tickets here!

And here’s another one from my desktop stash of fave photos of Nick Cave!!

And I think that’s going to be it for now.

I turned in all the revisions to Peitor yesterday afternoon and until I hear back from him, I get to sit here and work on my novel!! Yay!!

Honestly, such a great day around here. So different from yesterday.

Enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

***************

Okay!!!

Our new Daily Feature continues!

Gifts Keith Richards gave me when I was a wee bonny girl!!

Wherein I regale you with “songs Keith loved, that he would talk about in an interview in some magazine, and then I’d go out and try to find the record and then buy it with my babysitting money, and then I’d listen to it alone in my intense little room, playing it on the portable record player that my dad bought me, and the song would change my life. “

Today’s selection!!

Howlin’ Wolf, “Little Red Rooster”, 1962. Enjoy, gang!!

“Little Red Rooster”

I have a little red rooster
Too lazy to crow for day
I have a little red rooster
Too lazy to crow for day
Keep everything in the barnyard
Upset in every way

Oh the dogs begin to bark
And the hound begin to howl
Oh the dogs begin to bark
Hound begin to howl
Ooh watch out strange kind people
Cause little red rooster is on the prowl

If you see my little red rooster
Please drag him home
If you see my little red rooster
Please drag him home
There ain’t no peace in the barnyard
Since the little red rooster been gone

I have a little red rooster
Too lazy to crow for day
I have a little red rooster
Too lazy to crow for day
Keep everything in the barnyard
Upset in every way

c- 1961 – Willie Dixon

Good Morning, Good Morning!!

May 28, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Yes, I am up! I’m outta bed!!

And — NO!! — it wasn’t anywhere near 4AM.

It’s seems like 5AM is the best I can really do right now. So why fight it??

Okay, gang. Things just get better and better. Even though I had to wait 3 HOURS (!!) at the Honda dealership after my shift yesterday, so basically my entire day was a washout…

I did get a very quick update yesterday from the small press that has agreed to read my unpublished novel from 26 years ago, The Curse of Our Profound Disorder, with an eye toward perhaps publishing it — and she said that just after having read the opening sentence of the novel, she was VERY interested. [Her caps, not mine.]

This still doesn’t mean a “book deal” — she’ll have to read the whole thing. But it made me feel fantastic, gang. (When her email came through, I was up to my eyeballs, trying to find out why the nurse hadn’t come to see my client last FRIDAY to see if she had a UTI. And we needed someone to come out and see her ASAP. The last time she had a UTI, she was in rehab for over a month.) Anyway. Many phone calls. Trying to be polite. Not wanting to bite anyone’s head off because I know everyone, including the quite comely but rapidly aging moi, is so fucking busy right now…

Anyway. The mobile urgent care was on its way as I was clocking out.

So that email just made me feel so happy, gang.

And then, while sitting for an eternity in the Honda waiting room… the Agency texted me and said that the wife of my client who’s in the facility with deep cognitive impairment issues, can no longer afford us so he is no longer on my schedule, at all.

Even though it’s a difficult situation for his family, and I really like him, that news suddenly and quite wonderfully freed up FIVE HOURS of my schedule, indefinitely!!! Yay!!

Because I of course received many many WhatsApp texts from Peitor yesterday, needing me to look over many many edits on Episode 2. (And I did finally get to sit down at my desk last night, after dinner. And the edits were GREAT.)

And I’ve decided to start illegally acquiring Adderall in order to get all of this stuff — revise a novel, revise a play for Off-Broadway, write a television series — DONE! Yay!

[I am, of course, totally kidding. Who the fuck has time to be addicted to Adderall right now??]

************

Okay!!

Here’s this!!

Yesterday, I discovered a playlist of ALL my favorite songs from 2024!! So I thought, hmmm, and I hit the play button and drove off to town.

Wow, so bittersweet. So amazing. Most of the songs were the songs I’d listen to while driving back & forth to see my dad last year, during the final year of his life.

When THIS song came on, my heart hit the moon!! I immediately remembered how much I not only LOVE the sound of Johnny Depp’s voice, but this song, specifically, means so much to me. I loved Jim Carroll so much. He was such a big part of NYC for me in the 1980s.

The Hollywood Vampires’ version of “People Who Died”. (Song written by Jim Carroll, who, as fate would have it, died.)

I don’t really know what Johnny Depp is up to. The last I saw on Instagram was this (not smoking, but at least drinking…so, yay!):

*************

And here’s this!!

Just coz I’m not sure how he thinks we’re supposed to wait 14 more days before he goes on tour again for 912 months… (most shows are sold out already, but buy tickets here!!) Another personal fave photo from my desktop stash!!

And speaking of Nick Cave…

He sent out a quick Red Hand File yesterday, wherein he revealed that he and I have only ONE movie in common on the “favorites” list. He chose Living In Oblivion as the “movie that makes him laugh”.

[I love this movie, gang. I have seen it I don’t know how many times!!}

Anyway. You can read Nick’s favorite films in various categories HERE.

*************

From James Tabor — A Young Christian Believer Asks Dr Tabor Four Questions about Paul (47 mins):

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And that’s it! I gotta scoot and drive 30 miles to see my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man!! We’ll be going out for either sashimi and sake, or sushi and sake today. We’ll see what he decides.

Have a wonder-filled Wednesday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

************

Okay!

Our new Daily Feature continues!

Gifts Keith Richards gave me when I was a wee bonny girl!!

Today’s selection!!

Hank Williams, “Honky Tonk Blues”, 1952. Enjoy, gang!!

“Honky Tonk Blues”

Well I left my home down on the rural route
I told my Pa I’m going steppin out and get the
Honky tonk blues,
Yeah the honky tonk blues
Well Lord I got ’em,
I got the ho-on-ky tonk blues.

Well I went to a dance and I wore out my shoes
Woke up this mornin wishin I could lose
Them jumpin honky tonk blues,
Yeah the honky tonk blues
Well Lord I got ’em,
I got the ho-on-ky tonk blues.

Well I stopped into every place in town
This city life has really got me down
I got the honky tonk blues,
Yeah the honky tonk blues
Well Lord I got em,
got the ho-on-ky tonk blues.

I’m gonna tuck my worries underneath my arm
And scat right back to my Pappy’s farm
And leave these honky tonk blues,
Yeah the honky tonk blues
Well Lord I got ’em,
I got the ho-on-ky tonk blues.

c – 1952 – Henry B. Glover, Shep Sheppard, Bill Doggett, Billy (usa) Butler, Clifford Scott

“I wonder how that great new schedule is working out for her??”

May 24, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Yessirree, gang!!

That great new schedule I have around here — the one that’s going to give me an extra hour at my desk on those mornings (like, TODAY, for instance) when I have to drive to town and go see a client but I have WAY TOO MUCH script-writing to get to around here….

YES!! So far it’s looking a whole lot like the old schedule.

Hmmm….

I am trying really hard to get out of bed and get started around here at something that resembles being within the realm of 4AM…

However.

I’m getting there. I’m at least lying there at about 4:07AM, eyes open, telling myself, “Marilyn, you gotta get outta bed. Now. People the world over need to see some PAGES.”

But the peculiar thing about my bed, which perhaps I have never mentioned here on the blog before, is that it is REALLY REALLY comfortable. It’s super soft and cozy, with bunches of fluffy pillows, and the all-cotton Portuguese sheets are, like, a 3,924-thread count…

This morning, though, I was really tired because I’d had some incredibly cute kittens racing around all over me last night — at several different times during the night.

But eventually I got out of bed. At my usual 5:09AM.

But what are you gonna do? Right? You just keep trying…

And the texts from Sandra and Peitor keep arriving.

At least when Sandra texts me, it’s just a text. When Peitor texts me, it’s on WhatsApp and the moment I’ve read it he can see that I’ve read it…

Meaning that a response is needed. In a reasonable time-frame. The old excuses don’t work anymore–

Anyway!!

I confess. This morning is not really gonna happen. And after I see my favorite 94-year-old Japanese client today, I am meeting my girlfriend for LUNCH!! Yay!! An actual social obligation!! At Tequilaville!! One of my few remaining favorite restaurants. So the phone call I might be having with Sandra today regarding the play, at about 5PM, may or may not be super productive. But we shall see!

*************

Okay!

I saw this on Instagram yesterday. And I realized that if I could somehow maneuver myself into James Fox’s position at Keith’s dining room table there, I could probably get a whole lot of really great work done on my own memoir (which heavily features my adoration of Keith in my wee bonny girlhood)!!

Isn’t this a great photo??? Keith at work on his memoir, LIFE, from about 15 years ago.

**********

Here’s this from earlier this morning!

Kittens doing what they don’t do a whole lot of anymore!! (Sleep…)

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And here are these!!

More vintage Nick Cave. (The woman in France who posted these photos said that she will “never stop loving Nick Cave”. I’m guessing that I concur.)

And speaking of Nick Cave…

I think it was yesterday, but I am seriously losing track of the days here, but he posted a new Red Hand File, wherein he thanked everyone imaginable for such an incredible Wild God tour of North America. He said in part:

“I think of them all – The Bad Seeds, so deft, so expressive, so anarchic, so bloody awesome, and all I feel at this restless hour is a profound gratitude….”

You can read it in full here.

**************

Yesterday, I took my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man out to Peony Bistro for lunch, but you know what???

He wanted sushi!!

I guess hell froze over or something because he always, always, always wants sashimi. With sake. He still wanted sake, but he insisted, yesterday, that he wanted sushi.

And we did not have our usual waitress. We had a young Malaysian woman who tries really, really hard, but who nonetheless did not bring us exactly what we’d ordered. And I didn’t want her to feel bad so I didn’t say anything, but she brought us one order of the sushi lunch special — to split.

So. We did not get a lot of food, but at least we went out to lunch and we had a great time.

Oh! And, oddly enough, our fortune cookies had no irony whatsoever. None. Zippo. So I guess maybe hell really did freeze over yesterday. So I guess be on the lookout for random devils and demons is big puffy fur coats…

After lunch, though, when we were back at my client’s house, I showed him the trailer on YouTube for that show I’m currently watching on Netflix, “Samurai Gourmet.” I posted the trailer here the other day — it’s entirely in Japanese. Although the show itself has English subtitles.

Anyway, my client of course speaks fluent Japanese and he was actually chuckling quite a lot while watching the trailer!! It was really fun. It was clear, he really wanted to watch the show but he doesn’t have Netflix.

(Here it is again, in case you speak Japanese and missed it the first time. What a cool show! From 2017.) (2 minutes):

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Meanwhile…

James Tabor has a new (re-issued) book out that I just started reading, it is really good!! How Abraham’s faith in God underlies Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.

And, yes, I’m still studying Chinese and French every day, too… so I am really just sort of off the charts around here.

But on that happy note, I better scoot, gang!

I need to sort of pull my head together here and then drive to town. It is actually quite lovely here today, so it should be a really nice drive.

Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*********

I know I’ve posted this here before, but, wow, gang! Every time this song comes on my playlist, every single cell in my entire being RELAXES. At last.

Andrea Bocelli, “Besame Mucho”.

Enjoy, gang!

“You know how they say things can change overnight?”

May 13, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis 2 Comments

Just unbelievable, gang. (Regarding the news from yesterday.)

I still have the same pile of work to do, but now, just knowing that I am going to be able to retire at some point and (most likely) spend the twilight years of my illustrious life, sitting at my desk, writing…

Wow. It is a dream come true for me. It makes everything that’s going on in the here and now totally bearable.

***************

I don’t want to spend too much time talking about my relationship with my adopted dad on the blog, because it is going to be in my upcoming memoir (Joy: The Shortest Season) and I would, of course, prefer that you bought that!!

However, I do believe that my dad has been with me since the moment he died, and I think he was the one who “told” me to email the lawyer’s office and ask them for a copy of my dad’s Will. (This was at 4AM yesterday morning, when I’m not usually in bed on my phone, writing emails to lawyers.)

As you can imagine, it has changed my outlook on everything. I had been getting so unbelievably exhausted and depressed — that feeling that I was going to be exhausted forever. And never be able to stop working. Never be able to sit and write again… (My own stuff, I mean. Not the play or the TV show. I want to do those, but I want to do my own stuff, too.)

Anyway! Things can certainly change overnight.

Me, this morning. YES! Good news made my hair go back to being brown…

************

Okay. Here’s this! Two incredible guitar heroes in one interview!!

(No, they have nothing to do with the novel I wrote [purchase here!!], but I do absolutely love both of these guitar heroes)…

Joe Satriani and Steve Vai discuss the SatchVai Band with Guitar Player Magazine (40 mins):

*********

And on a completely different topic– More from a deep dive into the Book of Leviticus!

Ross K. Nichols – Who’s the Neighbor You’re Supposed to Love? (56 mins):

************

And here’s this!

From Seattle last night!

And you know what that means, right?

Only ONE MORE regular show left — tomorrow night in San Francisco. And then the gig at the festival in Pasadena on Saturday. And then the tour is OVER. Buy tickets here.

*************

Nick Cave sent out a Red Hand File yesterday. Another one about how people get his and Nicolas Cage’s names confused! Nick Cave said, in part:

“…Then Diego started crying again. I was about to explain that he’d made a mistake and mixed me up with the actor, Nicolas Cage, but he looked up at me with such a pitiful mixture of tragedy and wonder that I didn’t have the heart. “She just loves you, man,” he said. Then he asked me about my acting career. I said something like, “I’m just an ordinary person like you. Hollywood is not all it’s cracked up to be. It can be a cruel place. It gets lonely sometimes,” and so on…”

You can read it in full HERE.

************

On the home front —

I planted two more wonderful rose bushes yesterday!! Right underneath my kitchen window. Roses are my favorite flower (followed closely by lilacs) and I am so happy to now have 3 rosebushes.

BTW — here’s the song that the Emmylou Harris song from the other day, references! The Texas Swing classic, “San Antonio Rose”! It was originally composed by Bob Wills & his Texas Playboys, 1938. But it is sung here by another full-on favorite of mine: Merle Haggard!!! 1970. I love this version!!

And Peitor and I got some great work done on Episode 2 of the TV series proposal yesterday. So that felt great, too.

Other than that, I gotta scoot and head out to my shift now!!

Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

************

Yes! Emmylou goes on and on and on around here!

Here are some words to live by!! (And sort of my life story in my 20s, if you switch the West Coast for the East Coast!!) From1978, “Two More Bottles of Wine”. Enjoy, gang!!!!

“Two More Bottles Of Wine”

We came out west together with a common desire
The fever we had migtha set the west coast on fire
Two months later got trouble in mind
My baby moved out and left me behind
But it’s all right ’cause it’s midnight
And I got two more bottles of wine

The way he left sure turned my head around
Seemed like overnight he just up and put me down
Ain’t gonna let it bother me today
I been workin’ and I’m too tired anyway
But it’s all right ’cause it’s midnight
And I got two more bottles of wine

I’m sixteen hundred miles from the people I know
Been doin’ all I can but opportunity sure come slow
Lord I’d be in the sun all day
But I’m sweepin’ out a warehouse in west L.A.
But it’s all right ’cause it’s midnight
And I got two more bottles of wine

c – 1975 – Delbert Ross McClinton