Tag Archives: Half-Moon Bride by Marilyn Jaye Lewis

A Perfect Morning, All Things Considered

July 14, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I slept TOTALLY alone in the guest room last night, the windows open, the door closed, a couple of fans going.

Complete peace.

No cats or kittens disturbing me. At all.

And I slept for 8 beautiful hours.

AND…

This morning — a really gentle, wonderful RAIN. For several hours, already. It’s 72 degrees Fahrenheit right now, and only expected to reach 82 today. Yay.

AND….

I have the next 2 days off (as of right now, anyway). So I get to sit at my desk and work on all the various nips & tucks we made to the play last week in NYC.

So it’s a perfect day.

Of course, losing Little Blackie so unexpectedly yesterday hangs over us, but oddly enough — I think she was here with her kittens this morning because they suddenly reached a turning point in their independence.

Even little Billie Jo! The kitten who’s missing her 2 back feet.

This morning, I went into the family room to set the food bowls down for my own cats — meaning the dwindling colony of rescued ferals who’ve been with me now for 13 years — and who did I spy in the family room???

YES.

ALL 4 of the kittens had finally come down the stairs and were leaping about, darting happily around the room.

I could not believe that even Billie Jo had made it down the stairs, all by herself. All 4 of them raced all over, exploring everything, and even had their own breakfasts downstairs in the family room, too.

The other cats were not thrilled with this development, but I am so glad this has happened. It means that, little by little, my room will be my own again and I will be able to do things like yoga, without having kittens all over me. Yay!!!

So this is a great day for all of us, and I can’t help but feel convinced that Little Blackie’s spirit was part of this sudden shift today.

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Even though, yesterday, I was just a bag of frayed nerves and raw emotions, I still had to work my shift. But it went really well.

I was with the retired Minister and his wife again — I hadn’t been there in 2 weeks and it seemed like he has continued to make such great progress. He was alert, focused, and in such good spirits the whole evening.

With this particular client there’s nothing I really need to do except chat with him and provide companionship, because the wife does all the “caregiving” work. (It’s complicated medical stuff that I’m not legally allowed to do.)

So I sat there in their air-conditioned family room and chatted with them, and then watched the entire NASCAR Sonoma race. And then left.

And I got paid for that. Not only paid, but it was Sunday, so I also get paid the “Sunday” amount, which is higher than the weekday pay.

So I can’t really complain, even though, emotionally, witnessing the whole aging thing is still a lot for me to process. On top of feeling all that grief over Little Blackie, yesterday, that I couldn’t talk about.

It was still okay. But I am really, really rejoicing in this rainy Monday morning, day-off thing here today.

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I forgot to mention this, regarding my trip to NYC….

Remember those sundresses??? Wow, were they a big hit. So many compliments.

And just in general, I have to say that everyone — especially the men, regardless of age, ethnicity or religion — treated me so nice on that trip. I especially loved the men, holding doors open for me, saying hello, smiling.

This was everywhere I went. NO ONE AT ALL treated me like I was their grandmother!! Yay!! (Yes, I’m old enough to be a grandmother and yes, most of my friends from high school are grandmothers now, several times over, but I’M NOT ONE!!!!!)

Anyway.

So different from how things are around here in the Hinterlands. People are really friendly around here, but everyone basically regards me as “old”. So it was a really incredible change of pace.

I have to add that this dress, in particular, was probably the best thing I’ve purchased all year!! This dress, in real life, is just incredibly pretty. And it’s like wearing a flowing piece of air!

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On a more somber note–

Today marks ten years since Nick Cave’s son Arthur died. His Red Hand File today was devoted to his thoughts and feelings about that.

For some reason, it has not been posted on the web site yet, so I can’t link to it. But I can quote the email —

“These days, I am neither distrustful nor suspicious of the world, even though my heart breaks for it, and I am not despairing, depressed or embittered. Indeed, I see heartbreak as the most proportional response to the state of the world – to say I love you is to say my heart breaks for you, and this sentiment resonates within all things, bringing a clarity to both the world before us and the world beyond the veil. Sorrow becomes a way of life, part laughter, part tears, with very little space between. It is a way of conducting oneself in the world, of loving it, of worshipping it….”

And Wednesday, Nick Cave’s Solo Tour with Colin Greenwood on bass resumes — in Mantova, Italy. Tickets are still available for this show only. You can buy them here.

And here’s this! From Instagram.

From the Bad Seeds show in San Francisco , back in May.

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And I just wanted to give a quick “thank you” again to everyone who’s downloading my eBooks over at Smashwords, during that Summer Sale!!

I really appreciate it (Freak Parade seems to be outpacing the Muse Revisited Collection!)

Details are on my substack page, if you’re interested in the sale. All of my eBook titles with Smashwords are FREE to download for the month of July. ADULTS ONLY. Graphic erotic literature.

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Okay, gang. I’m going to get started around here.

Enjoy your Monday, wherever you are in the world! (It looks like the value of silver is already inching up this morning, so this could be the start of a wild summer. We shall see!!)

Thanks for visiting, gang.

I love you guys. See ya!!

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Me! And a New York City from long ago!! Enjoy, gang.

Try It Real Slow

Driving in the dead of night
Coasting through a traffic light
Aiming for a back road
Where we could park it for the night
Thinking we would make it sober and
Try it real slow.

There’s music on the radio
Screaming bunch of white boys
Churning out the Black soul
But turning it to white noise
Well, we could learn to make it sober by
Trying real slow.

CHORUS
Any disappointed stranger will tell you
Love is just a ball & chain
Oh but baby you’re the kind of man
That I like to talk to

You can play the wine & dine
Pick yourself a pretty wife
Gather all that you can hold
Then drag it round your whole life
Or you could learn to make it sober by
Trying real slow

REPEAT CHORUS

I turned it over, round and round
Chasing it the hard way
Until my dreams were just a white line
Sailing down the Interstate;
Well, love was gonna shake me sober
But I didn’t let it grow.

REPEAT CHORUS

Oh, but you and me will be all right
By letting every yesterday
Go fading with the taillights
Sailing down the highway
And we can learn to make it sober
By trying real slow.

Yeah, we can learn to make it sober
By trying real slow

© 1984 Marilyn Jaye Lewis
First of May Songs, BMI

Mixed Bag

July 13, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

We got an unexpected rainstorm yesterday, right after I got home from my shift with my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man.

It got rid of the heat but the humidity jumped through the roof and I had such a hard time sleeping last night. I am really wiped out today.

However, the weather is PERFECT today. Not humid at all. The house is really comfortable…

But, sadly, even though Little Blackie seemed better last evening, she took a bad turn during the night and now she is dying — as I type this. She is barely breathing. her body is completely shutting down. Since the weather is better, I brought her back up to the bedroom, so that she could at least be in the vicinity of her kittens as she leaves us.

It seems like it happened so fast. She was okay when I got home from the airport on Thursday evening, but she didn’t have much of an appetite. Friday, she was restless, looking for a cool spot to lie down on. By yesterday, things got a little dire so I moved her someplace a lot cooler, but by then she stopped eating and I had to give her water with a dropper. But she was responsive and was moving around.

Then, this morning, it was bad.

After all the other cats & kittens were fed, I picked her up and carried her outside, where the weather was just beautiful and the birds were singing and the sun was just coming up. I sang to her and she was responsive; she even wagged her tail, but after that — she suddenly went down hill, fast. And, literally as I type this, she is almost dead.

A stray who showed up on my porch last fall, and stayed long enough to survive the winter, then have kittens on my porch, then raise them and nurse them and then wean them up in my bedroom for 3 months, and now — almost gone.

This is what I sang to her this morning, and she seemed to really bounce back for just a few minutes–

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Meanwhile, her kittens are not only completely weaned, they are out and about, exploring the upstairs like crazy. Little furry maniacs. And hanging out on the stairway, too, but they haven’t gotten brave enough to actually explore the downstairs yet — where all the other cats are not at all happy to have them in their home.

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Anyway.

My shift with my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man yesterday was just wonderful.

He remembered that I had been away in NYC (!!) and he was really happy to have me back. We went out for Japanese food, and he was just very focused and in such good spirits. He was able to have actual conversations with me the whole day.

And judging by the notes left by my replacement caregivers while I was gone, he was a little on the stubborn side last week and was not being very cooperative.

But, I’m back. And apparently he’s happy again. So, of course that made me feel great.

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I spoke briefly with Sandra yesterday and she was just as wiped out by the heat in NYC as I had been. It took her a couple days to recover from it, too. It looks like we will likely head back to NYC in late September, but in the meantime, we will have a ton of rehearsals to do on Zoom.

And meanwhile, I have to find someone who will stay over from now on and take care of the cats. My birth mom seemed almost like she wanted to do it, but we’ll see. She does seem to be in really good health right now. So who knows.

She is the only one who I really trust with my cats and my house, but I guess we’ll just see.

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Okay!

On Wednesday, July 16th, THIS resumes! In Italy! And there are actually tickets still available!! You can buy them here.

Nick Cave and Colin Greenwood — Nick’s solo tour of Europe 2025.

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Here’s this:

James Tabor – Is Mark the Earliest Surviving JEWISH Text after the Jerusalem Temple Was Destroyed? (48 mins):

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Phil did a brief livestream last evening. A little bit about current events, and a lot about the value of silver.

All Rise – July 12th, 2025 (1 hr 17 mins):

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And Charlie Ward had an interesting item in his newsletter yesterday. This was definitely true about me!! I started smoking, drinking, experimenting with drugs when I was 12.

“A groundbreaking study tracking over 10,000 children has upended conventional wisdom about addiction, suggesting that brain differences may precede, not result from early drug use….

“Researchers found that children who began using alcohol, cannabis, or nicotine before age 15 already had notable brain differences before their first use. These included larger overall brain volumes and expanded cortical surface areas, characteristics also found in kids who had already started using substances at the study’s outset….

“The study aligns with previous research linking brain structure to traits such as curiosity, risk-taking and impulsivity factors that can raise the likelihood of experimenting with drugs….”

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Okay, I think that’s it for now. It’s such a complicated morning here, gang. And then I have an evening shift with the retired Minister.

I hope you’re having a good Sunday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya.

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Also from this morning —

“Could I Have This Dance”

I’ll always remember
The song they were playing
The first time we danced and I knew

As we swayed to the music
And held to each other
I fell in love with you

Could I have this dance
For the rest of my life
Could you be my partner
Every night
When we’re together
It feels so right
Could I have this dance
For the rest of my life

I’ll always remember
That magic moment
When I held you close to me

As we move together
I knew forever
You’re all I’ll ever need

Could I have this dance
For the rest of my life
Could you be my partner
Every night
When we’re together
It feels so right
Could I have this dance
For the rest of my life

c – Wayland D. Holyfield, Bob Lee House

Yes! I do!

July 11, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I miss NYC already.

But wow, that heat was intense. I’m guessing it’s best to go there in the late Spring and early Autumn now — just to be on the safe side.

But what a productive trip it was, gang. Those rehearsals were really just incredible. We were all really, really happy with them. We got so much done.

But, naturally, the moment I got to LaGuardia yesterday, around noon, everything in my little happiness bubble started to shift.

The plane was late taking off, so, of course, it was late landing, which meant we also had to wait on the runway for an available gate. I get really impatient when I have to sit and wait at the end of a trip.

I will try not to fly Delta Airlines to NYC again. Since it’s such a short flight, they pawn you off to a much smaller airline, that uses much smaller planes that are cramped and crowded and have even less frills than Spirit Airlines had.

But Spirit was just the best, even though they were “no frills”. The planes were comfortable and the service was great, etc., etc. Anyway, I’m sorry they went bankrupt. They have, like, one flight a year to NYC now, and it makes about 12 stops.

Anyway.

The final Uber driver for my trip was friendly but the AC in his car didn’t work so great. So my one-hour trip back home from the airport was really uncomfortable.

And then, when I finally got home — what a disaster, gang. It was so disheartening. I’m not going to be able to hire a cat sitter that only comes in once a day when I have this many cats. I definitely need a cat sitter who will sleep-in and just be on top of everything.

The house was a mess and the cats were all, basically, a little freaked out from being on their own so much.

It took me 2 hours to get the house back to normal — 2 hours, after having been in transit for a total of 8 hours. I was exhausted by the time I was finished (8 o’clock last night).

But I slept in this morning, and it hasn’t been too hot in here today, so that’s good!! I did 3 loads of laundry then drove to town and ran all the errands. So now I am just finally sitting down at my desk.

I can’t tell you how nice it was to have so many days off from the caregiving. I have to sort of psyche myself up to get back at it tomorrow. But on we go…

This is likely in my immediate future. We shall see!

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Okay.

This link was very interesting– an article in an Israeli newspaper, sent by Ross K. Nichols:

“What is the Izbet Sartah Inscription?“

“Discover the Izbet Sartah Inscription: A pottery shard allegedly from a 12th-10th century BC Israelite village (site of Eben-Ezer), etched with the proto-Canaanite alphabet—early Hebrew script! Some claim that it reveals surprising literacy among ancient Israelites during Joshua’s settlement era, supporting ideas of early biblical writing like the Torah.”

[online article is here]

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And new from James Tabor:

Is This The Face of Jesus? Getting the Facts Straight on the Turin Shroud (2 hrs):

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And two photos I loved from Instagram!

Nick Cave, piano, and Jesus–

Keith, pumping gas in the South of France, 1971–

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And here’s this!

This is a current photo of the really great school where I studied for the Ministry out here in Ohio — they sent me a flyer today and this photo was along the bottom. Naturally, the school is in the middle of farmland, for as far as the eye can see! Why wouldn’t I love it??

FYI — when I first began studying for the Ministry, it was at this building in NYC in the late 90s. Not a bad school just an incredibly different vibe!

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And I think that’s it. I better scoot while I still have any energy left at all.

I hope you’ve been having a great Friday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*************

Wishful thinking!! Enjoy, gang.

Wow, what a beautiful morning!

July 2, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Can’t help it, gang. We gotta start with this!

It was 61 degrees Fahrenheit when I woke up this morning! I even had to turn the fans off because it was “too cool”… Yay!!

The day should really just be fantastic out here in the Hinterlands. I am really looking forward to it.

I won’t say that I wish I had the day off, but I kinda wish I had the day off. I got so much done yesterday and I would love to just hang out in this beautiful weather and work on the novel.

But, alas… the caregiving work continues.

Still, Sandra and I got the finishing touches done on the play yesterday, so we are ready for NYC next week.

In case you forgot, we’ll be staying here! The Empire Hotel:

Oh, and I watched this, on Sandra’s request. I had to sign up for HBO-Max, which I did, but then promptly cancelled the subscription after watching the film because I have way too many subscriptions going on over here. but anyway– I loved it!!!!

Enigma

I thought this documentary was so well done and really just very informative about the Paris and London TS/TV scene in the late 1950s and early 1960s.

I already knew a little about Amanda Lear because she was connected to David Bowie in the 70s, but I knew nothing about any of the rest of it. Very, very interesting. And very well done.

****************

And just FYI — if you are new to the blog. Yes, I support Trump. Yes, I follow Q. Yes, I was a digital soldier for General Flynn throughout the fake Biden regime and no, I don’t regret a minute of that indescribably time-consuming, and sometimes frightening, work. And yes, I am AGAINST allowing children to make irreversible decisions about their gender identity — it is hard enough for adults to make informed decisions about that.

However —

Yes, I am part of the LGBTQ+ community and have been, since, like, FOREVER. And most of the LGBTQ+ friends I still have (the ones who are still alive, anyway, most of them died from AIDS) are old school, like me, and also tend to be pro-Trump, pro-USA, pro-US Constitution, pro-Protect the Children.

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On that note!! Back to our program!!

THANK YOU, once again, to all of you who are already downloading my eBooks over at the Smashwords Summer Sale! Which started yesterday! (Details HERE. Adults Only!! Bisexual/Fetish Erotica.)

It always makes my heart sing just a little bit when I see those downloads getting underway, since these particular eBooks are really, really OLD. They’ve been around forever! I love it that people still read them.

I still remember every story I wrote, every publisher I worked with, every editor and every underground zine — the whole sh-bang, What a great time it was, gang.

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Also, a huge thank you to readers in the UK who are downloading the Kindle edition of Neptune and Surf, which was my first book, originally published by the legendary Richard Kasak at Masquerade Books, NYC, in 1999. (The rights are now owned by Hachette UK, as part of their Modern Erotic Classics series.)

Things like this, gang, all these years later, just make me really happy. So thank you, UK readers, whoever you are!

I hate this cover, but I love this book!

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Okay! Well.

I’m still a little concerned about leaving all these cats with a cat sitter who won’t actually be staying in my house (in the past, my birth mom would stay here and take care of the cats while I was gone, but now there are too many cats and she has gotten too old). I’m worried about them being alone too much. But other than that, I am finally starting to get excited about going back to NYC.

I think this break in the weather helps, since it makes everything just feel “lighter,” you know? Now that I can think straight again, I want to just have some fun.

And I can’t stress enough what a great feeling it is — for both Sandra and me — to be undertaking this version of “The Guide to Being Fabulous” rather than the version that was ultimately produced in Toronto back in 2023.

It has been a long, long time coming. And after having watched Enigma on MAX, I now feel that, more than ever, Sandra’s story needs to be told in a way that doesn’t short change her entire life.

It’s exciting, gang.

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Other than that, there’s not much going on!

I should probably close this and get ready to go to town. It’s another afternoon with my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man.

Have a wonder-filled Wednesday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Okay. Here’s this!

I saw this on Instagram the other day, but I didn’t know it was on YouTube!! So here you go!

The Stones’ New Single | Tribute to Clifton Chenier | June 25, 2025 | The Rolling Stones

Getting better by the minute!

July 1, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Wow!

Not only an actual day off, but the bearable weather continues — which means my brain is still working! Yay!!

AND — the Summer Sale over at Smashwords starts today, gang, and continues through the month of July.

All the info and direct links are on my substack page. The sale includes free downloads of Freak Parade and The Muse Revisited: Volumes, 1,2, &3.

The sale is for my eBooks only. And these books, as always, are intended for ADULT READSERS ONLY. Thanks!!

I don’t USUALLY look like this, but just for today, I look like this…

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In other great SALE news!!

Cave Things started a summer sale today, too!

All kinds of cool things are on sale over there to help you beat the heat, or whatever it is you’re trying to beat….

Yet again, some of my favorites are on sale!! Including, but not limited to;

The Hotel Girls Notebook — $12.00 (plus tons of shipping to the USA) (Only adults can look at the image below, thank you very much for your cooperation)

The fantastic Happy Tea Set, the whole set, or separate pieces of it! The Happy Tea Pot, $68.00 (plus all sorts of overseas shipping fees!)

Up Jumped the Devil Milk Jug! $40.00 (~~no shipping~~ Oops! Tons of shipping there, too!)

That milk jug commemorates one of my absolute favorite Nick Cave songs of all time!!!

“Up Jumped the Devil”, Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, 1988, from the incredible album, Tender Prey.

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Here’s this!

Not only because I love this photo so much, but also because my great-great grandmother was a full-blood Blackfoot Indian, and judging by the date listed below, she very well might have known Chief Two Guns White Calf! I think that is so cool.

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And speaking of guns…

I am really, really thinking I will have to cancel my monthly membership at the shooting range, gang. I am only getting one day off a week these days, and it is going to continue for the rest of the summer.

I’m going to call over there today and see if maybe I can just temporarily suspend my membership until Fall. We’ll see. I hate to do it, but I have` absolutely no time. And I just keep paying and paying and paying…

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Okay, well. have I had some intense shifts the last couple of days. In a good way, but still intense.

I saw the retired Minister and his wife on Sunday evening and it was great. He is making such great progress. He was lucid the entire time I was with him, and he talked a lot about his ministry, as well as when he first decided to become a Christian when he was in his teens (he is 80 now).

It was an amazing evening, but as usual it sort of wiped me out emotionally.

Ditto, my shift with my favorite client who is back from Florida. For different reasons, although she is a retired Chaplain, so it was all in the same vein.

I still don’t understand WHY ON EARTH I decided to return to this type of work, but clearly, all of this is on my path right now for a reason.

Oh, and oddly enough!! In my novel-in-progress, The Curse of Our Profound Disorder, that I am working on after a 26-year hiatus… the father in the story is a retired Minister. And the upcoming remainder of the novel is primarily about HIM.

Hmmm…….

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On the home front —

I downloaded all the forms I need to fill out in order to apply for that USDA home-improvement loan/grant for low-income seniors living in rural areas.

We’ll see if I can get those filled out before I leave for NYC, but something tells me it would be pushing my luck. I have some stuff I need to do on the play today, and today is my only day off.

But at least I have the forms!!

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And I think that’s it for now!

I have to finish doing the laundry then get focused on “The Guide to Being Fabulous”!

Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Yes, the Annie Murray kick continues around here!

How can you NOT love this one, gang??? One of her first hits — “Snowbird.”

Anne Murray, “Snowbird”, 1969. From her album, This Way is My Way. Enjoy, gang!!

“Snowbird”

Beneath this snowy mantle cold and clean
The unborn grass lies waiting
For its coat to turn to green
The snowbird sings the song he always sings
And speaks to me of flowers
That will bloom again in spring

When I was young
My heart was young then, too
Anything that it would tell me
That’s the thing that I would do
But now I feel such emptiness within
For the thing that I want most in life’s
The thing that I can’t win

Spread your tiny wings and fly away
And take the snow back with you
Where it came from on that day
The one I love forever is untrue
And if I could you know that I would
Fly away with you

The breeze along the river seems to say
That he’ll only break my heart again
Should I decide to stay
So, little snowbird
Take me with you when you go
To that land of gentle breezes
Where the peaceful waters flow

Spread your tiny wings and fly away
And take the snow back with you
Where it came from on that day
The one I love forever is untrue
And if I could you know that I would
Fly away with you

Yeah, if I could you know that I would
Fl-y-y-y-y away with you

c – 1969 – Gene MacLellan

Finally!! Heatwave Truly Over!

June 29, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

I once again have this thing called a BRAIN. I can BREATHE. I can actually walk across the room without feeling like I’m going to faint!!

Yay!!

And it occurred to me, gang, this home improvement loan that I’m at least going to apply for — I guess I will add getting Central AC in with the things that should get done around here.

I really never wanted AC in this specific house because of all the great windows and the usually great cross-breezes. But when I first moved in, I did get all the duct work done so that Central AC can be easily installed. And after what I just went through this past week — at least having the option to turn on AC would probably be a really smart thing to do.

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Yesterday was a really good day. Not only was it FILLED with rain and thunderstorms out here in the Hinterlands, I also had a really wonderful time with my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man.

We talked a lot about his past, his incredible father, his life in Hong Kong, in Tokyo, and the years he attended a small college in Kansas for his Ministerial Degree — we talk about this stuff all the time, because his long-term memory is fantastic. However, this time, through a sort of heroic mental effort, he said to me as I was getting ready to leave: “Without you, Marilyn, I would have no reason to remember what a wonderful life I’ve had. I appreciate you so much.”

It is kind of astounding that he was able to express himself in that specific way, since his short term memory is extremely faulty, to say the least, and using his brain in the “present” is very difficult for him. To be able to help someone give the gift of his whole life back to himself, is, well — I don’t know. It overwhelms me, but in a good way.

And this evening, I’m back with the former Minister and his wife, and I’m really looking froward to that. I had such an interesting time with them last week.

And, luckily, ALL my clients have Central AC, so I at least have a brain when I’m working…

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Okay, so I am officially getting myself into “going to NYC” mode around here. Even though I have 7 shifts between today and next Sunday, when I leave for the airport, I’m trying to focus more on that feeling of freedom I get when I am in NYC.

Add to that, the feeling that Sandra and I are finally going to get the version of “The Guide to Being Fabulous” that we had always envisioned — I would really much rather dwell on that than on all the shifts I have to work this week!!

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This was really, really worth listening to, gang. If you have 22 minutes, check it out. FYI — Warren G. Harding was another President from Ohio who was allegedly and/or officially murdered. [Direct link gives you more control over the ads!]

Mike King’s “Show & Tell” — Who Killed President Warren Harding? (22 mins):

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Okay!

I saw this great photo last night. It’s from the show they did in Rochefort, France on Wednesday — Nick Cave and Colin Greenwood:

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And I think that’s it for right now! I want to actually try to do some yoga today, before heading out for my shift.

Tomorrow morning I have to leave the house around 6:30AM, so I won’t be posting to the blog.

Enjoy what’s left of your weekend, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting!!

I love you guys. See ya!!

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Okay. Bear with me!! I’m on an Annie Murray kick around here!!!

I love this song, gang. I’ve posted it here before, but I really just love it. It’s been filling my kitchen the last couple of mornings. And, truthfully, I would love to be able to sing a song like this for somebody, someday. We shall see… I’m not dead yet!

Anne Murray, “You Needed Me”, 1978, from her album Restoring The Past. Enjoy, gang.

“You Needed Me”

I cried a tear, you wiped it dry
I was confused, you cleared my mind
I sold my soul, you bought it back for me
And held me up and gave me dignity
Somehow you needed me

You gave me strength to stand alone again
To face the world out on my own again
You put me high upon a pedestal
So high that I could almost see eternity
You needed me, you needed me

And I can’t believe it’s you I can’t believe it’s true
I needed you and you were there
And I’ll never leave, why should I leave, I’d be a fool
‘Cause I finally found someone who really cares

You held my hand when it was cold
When I was lost, you took me home
You gave me hope when I was at the end
And turned my lies back into truth again
You even called me friend

You gave me strength to stand alone again
To face the world out on my own again
You put me high upon a pedestal
So high that I could almost see eternity
You needed me, you needed me
You needed me, you needed me

c – 1978 – Randy Goodrum

Just Like I Said It Would be!

June 28, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Yes, all those thunderstorms we were supposed to have yesterday, and the “cooler” temperatures and less humidity….(that I predicted were not really going to come!)

We got maybe a handful of rain, around 8PM. And of course the temperatures soared back into the mid-90s Fahrenheit. Bright sunshine EVERYWHERE. Another ungodly hot & humid day yesterday.

Somehow, I managed to get all the groceries and cat food, etc. (a total of 5 stores) yesterday after my shift. I got everything that needs to be here while I’m in NYC.

And I got everything put away, all the litter boxes cleaned, various cats got fed, I watered all the flowers outside (roses are BLOOMING!!), in time to call Sandra right at 5PM…

But my brain was fried. It was so fucking HOT.

Sandra: “Really? You’re having a heatwave there? It’s been really nice around here. Mid-70s every day.”

Just hearing that made me want to faint…

Anyway.

I don’t know how everything gets done here, because I am almost brain-dead. And even the house is clean. Like, I mean, the whole house. I look around and I barely remember doing that. On top of the heatwave, my shifts increased like crazy the past couple weeks. So I feel like I’m never even home. But apparently I am, and I am still on top of everything. (That thought is exhausting, right there.)

But guess what happened last night??!! I was already in bed, drifting to sleep in the oppressive heat when it started:

YES!

Last night was the 4th of July fireworks over at the ballpark. I missed the whole thing. I was under the impression the fireworks were going to be on Monday, June 30th, and I was really excited because I’ll have the whole evening off as well as the following day, but, alas, that was the “rain date” in case they got rained out last night (LOL).

That really disappointed me, gang. And I was too wiped out to even think of getting out of bed, getting dressed, and going out to the yard to watch them.

BTW — in all the smaller towns and villages around here, they don’t do the fireworks on the actual 4th because they can’t compete with the HUGE “Red White & BOOM!” celebration that goes on in downtown Columbus, over the river, on the actual 4th of July.

Anyway. It’s over. And I missed them.

My life feels so weird these days that it actually feels creepy. Like it isn’t even my real life.

***********

I hate to maybe jinx it, but today is SUPPOSED to be a nice day. Much lower temperatures, less humidity. So far, it is a really really perfect summer day but the day is young….

We’ll see.

*************

So I have only ONE DAY off before I have to leave for NYC next Sunday.

I do have some minor edits that I need to do on the play before I leave town. But other than that, I’m ready to go. Money, credit cards, new clothes, stocked up on all my supplements, the Ubers are reserved, the cat-sitter is triple checked!

It’s really interesting to see how my brain actually does work even when it feels “dead” from all the heat. (The heat wave is supposed to be over as of tonight.)

So now, all I really need to do is breathe and let myself get excited about the PLAY!

You know, as far as my career goes, I have zero complaints. I have done everything I ever wanted to do as a writer, and then some. And especially after I quit the music “business” and got into publishing in NYC, I had a really wonderful career — as a writer, editor, publisher, teacher. I really have no complaints.

Even considering how the traditional publishing world that I worked in completely disappeared after self-publishing and eBooks took over, I don’t at all lose sight of the fact that I had a really, really great career in traditional small-press publishing while it existed.

And I really love that I was a big part of that world while it existed. And I met and worked with such amazing people, from all over the world.

I have wonderful memories and no complaints.

That said, though — WOW! The fact that our play is finally heading to Off-Broadway, even while it was never an actual goal of mine when I first moved to NYC, it just blows me away, gang. I honestly can’t believe it. I love theater so much. And I just really, really want to have some FUN now. I can’t believe that pre-production stuff gets underway in just about a week. Wow.

So I have to remind myself to take some time to breathe and be happy.

I might actually do that today!!

**************

Okay, I think that’s it! I better scoot and get ready to head to town for my shift.

I hope you have a fun Saturday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

**************

Here’s a blast from the past!

Another one of those songs that I totally forgot about but which I used to love!!

Carly Simon, “That’s the Way I’ve Always Heard it Should Be”, 1971 (!! — okay, so why was I listening to & loving depressing songs like this when I was 11??). And at age 65 now, I have 2 marriages done and long gone. Too late now to “change my tune”!! All right. Enjoy, gang!

“That’s The Way I Always Heard It Should Be“

My father sits at night with no lights on
His cigarette glows in the dark
The living room is still
I walk by, no remark
I tiptoe past the master bedroom where
My mother reads her magazines
I hear her call sweet dreams
But I forgot how to dream

But you say it’s time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that’s the way I’ve always heard it should be
You want to marry me, we’ll marry

My friends from college they’re all married now
They have their houses and their lawns
They have their silent noons
Tearful nights, angry dawns
Their children hate them for the things they’re not
They hate themselves for what they are
And yet they drink, they laugh
Close the wound, hide the scar

But you say it’s time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that’s the way I’ve always heard it should be
You want to marry me, we’ll marry

You say we can keep our love alive
Babe, all I know is what I see
The couples cling and claw
And drown in love’s debris
You say we’ll soar like two birds through the clouds
But soon you’ll cage me on your shelf
I’ll never learn to be just me first
By myself

Well O.K., it’s time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that’s the way I’ve always heard it should be,
You want to marry me, we’ll marry
We’ll marry

Music by: Carly Simon/ Lyrics by: Jacob Brackman

Back at it!!

June 27, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Okay, it’s Friday!!

It’s not quite as hot around here since I last posted, but the increase in humidity more than compensates for that.

Luckily, thunderstorms are supposed to visit us for most of the day. I hope this is true, because they keep saying that — for the last few days — and the thunderstorms haven’t happened. Even though they are clearly visible, approaching on the horizon, they never arrive. Just some light rain. Hence the increased humidity.

I try very, very hard to think straight in high humidity but I am not always entirely successful, gang. I simply can’t breathe right, so there’s not enough oxygen getting to my wee bonny brain!

(And I still can’t help but think that all these White Hats who are pretending that China is our enemy, that Russia is our enemy, that Iran is anyone’s enemy at this point, that Netanyahu wasn’t already dealt with a long time ago…. okay. Methinks these same folks are once again fucking with the weather!)

(Call me crazy!! Whether or not it’s conspiracy-theory related, there is a good chance that I’m crazy about all sorts of things so it’s safe to call me crazy, however… there is still something wacky about this weather!)

******************

Yesterday was insane.

I was with my favorite client who has recently returned from Florida. All was well until — for privacy reasons I can’t go into the details — I had to drop everything and take her to urgent care.

From there, the entire day went kaflooey! (For some odd reason, I’m being told “kaflooey” is not a word!!) I wish I could tell you why it went kaflooey, just so you could have deep sympathy for me! But I can’t. It is sufficient to say, the urgent care “experience” made me feel like I was losing my mind.

And it had nothing to do with anyone who worked at the urgent care facility…

But it also made me have to work late — by half an hour. And I had that plumber coming!!

But long story short — I got home in time for the plumber. And it was a husband & wife plumbing team. They were really nice. And they fixed my issue in the upstairs ancient bathtub, but they told me that really all those old pipes and fixtures have to be replaced. And that I really, really need to get a water softener put in, because that’s what’s killing the pipes and fixtures. (My house is 126 years old and the upstairs bathtub was installed in the 1940s.)

Anyway! Loyal readers of this lofty blog know that I have no problem whatsoever applying for low income home improvement grants for senior citizens living in rural areas!!!

In fact, I got my home a beautiful new roof that way!! At no cost to me.

So, here’s hoping, a grant from the USDA to update my plumbing will be in my foreseeable future.

Meanwhile, the tub drain is working great for the first time since I bought this house… for now, anyway.

*******************

Apparently, yesterday was Colin Greenwood’s birthday!!

And speaking of the Nick Cave solo tour with Colin Greenwood on bass…

Here’s a photo from the show in Rochefort, France. the other night. Most of the better images were videos. Not many photos that weren’t from hopelessly far away:

And I have to say, that people keep uploading images and videos from the Hamburg shows and it really seems like those shows were kind of spectacular.

Next shows up are in Paris, July 5th & 6th, but both shows are sold out. Only 2 shows left in the entire tour that have tickets available. Buy tickets here.

*************

Well, on the kitten front…

Bobby Joe (one of 2 kittens that we recently noticed are actually males), managed to give himself a terrific black eye, from all his jumping and leaping and going generally nuts when he’s playing with the other kittens.

A couple days ago, in the really dreadful high heat, his eye began to look horrible. It rolled up in his head and other awful looking – gooey things. So I started lightly swabbing the eyelid with colloidal silver and, voila, it is getting back to normal at a wicked pace! It is almost completely fine already.

This makes 3 cats in less than a year who have had serious eye issues that were — thank God — completely fixed with colloidal silver, gang. (It works on humans, too, of course! Ears, eyes, sinuses, or taken internally. But only twice a day, no more than 10 days in a row.) (I’m not a doctor. I’m not giving you health advice. just sayin’ what works over in our neck of the woods…)

*************

Today, I’m back with my favorite 94-year-old Japanese man, and I believe it is sushi-sashimi day!! Assuming he feels up to it! It will be nice to just hang out with him — assuming no medical emergencies. We shall see!! (I can’t stress enough how much fun we have whenever we are together, gang.)

*************

Okay. I guess I better scoot.

Enjoy your Friday wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!!

*************

I rediscovered this song the other day!! I’d forgotten all about it.

Holy shit, do I love it. It is not only prime Rodney Crowell songwriting, but also Emmylou Harris at the peak of her career.

I definitely used to include this in my sets when I was a singer-songwriter in NYC.

“Leaving Louisiana in the Broad Daylight”, 1978. From the album, Quarter Moon in a Ten-Cent Town. Enjoy, gang!!!

“Leaving Louisiana in the Broad Daylight”

Mary took to running with a travelin’ man
Left her momma crying with her head in her hands
Such a sad case, so broken hearted
She say mom, I got to go, I gotta get outta here
I gotta get out of town; I’m tired of hanging around
I gotta roll on between the ditches

It’s just an ordinary story ’bout the way things go
Round and around nobody knows, but the highway
Goes on forever, that ‘ol highway rolls on forever
Lord she never would’ve done it if she hadn’t got drunk

If she hadn’t started running with a travelin man
If she hadn’t started taking those crazy chances
She say daughter, let me tell you ’bout the travelin kind
Everywhere he’s goin’ such a very short time
He’ll be long gone before you know it, he’ll be long

Gone before you know it
She say never have I known it when it felt so good
Never have I knew it when I knew I could
Never have I done it when it looked so right
Leaving Louisiana in the broad daylight

This is down in the swampland, anything goes
It’s alligator bait and the bars don’t close
It’s the real thing down in Louisiana

Did you ever see a Cajun when he really got mad
When he really got trouble like a daughter gone bad
It gets real hot down in Louisiana

The stranger better move it or he’s gonna get killed
He’s gonna have to get it or a shotgun will
It ain’t no time for lengthy speeches
There ain’t no time for lengthy speeches
She say never have I know it when it felt so good

Never have I knew it when I knew I could
Never have I done it when it looked so right
Leaving Louisiana in the broad daylight
It’s just an ordinary story ’bout the way things go
Round and around nobody knows, but the highway goes on forever
There ain’t no way to stop the water

c – 1978 – Rodney Crowell, Donovan Cowart

“You’d think she’d be better at this, right? I mean, I’m just saying…”

June 24, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Glory hallelujah, gang! As if I didn’t need more on my plate!!

“Yes, please, I’ll have some more!”

Something caught my eye this morning that alerted me to these new facts:

Bobbi Jo is, in fact, Bobby Joe.

And Betty Jo needs a new name…. Arrrgggh!

Since my beloved 2-legged Billie Jo is still indeed a female, I guess I have to give her name to Betty and now Betty will be Billy Joe. (Or I could just call them all by the same name. I don’t think they will ever know the difference.)

But there we have it! I’m going to have a summer full of expensive visits to the new veterinarian! And here I’d thought I only had one (neutered) male in the house and could take all the time I wanted…

“Why does it take so long for those 2 little things to show up?”

Oh, and another happy thing!!!

My upstairs bathtub drain is completely backed up. Nothing accents a house full of overwhelming heat and humidity like a tub full of stagnant water!!

Well, I’m planning to remove the water. But I really, really, really don’t want to call a plumber…. I ordered a Zip-It. So we’ll see, although I don’t feel too encouraged. A (hopefully really, really good-looking) plumber is likely in my immediate future, too.

***************

Good news, though! Yay!

After posting that photo I took of the poor heat-stroked kittens (see the end of yesterday’s post), I did finally open the bedroom door yesterday. I propped a box fan in the doorway, and stacked some hard cover books precariously on top of the fan, in the event that any cats wanted to try sailing over the top of the fan, in either direction.

Well, it worked! I only had one cat try to get into my room yesterday afternoon, and the books and fan tumbled noisily to the floor and it scared the bejeezus out of him — and all the other cats & kittens! And so that took care of that. No one else tried it.

Now, the kittens and the Mommy-cat stay in the room, and the other cats stay out. And we all get some air circulating in here, finally!!

Today is supposed to be the final day of the actual heatwave. And I have to say, gang — you know me and my conspiracy theorist friends!! There is something truly strange about this heatwave. 93 degrees Fahrenheit isn’t usually this unbearable.

The summer temperatures here have always gone into the 90s at some point, but it never felt like this. (And, add to that, the White Hat WWIII scenario, pushing people to the “boiling point”… hmmm.)

Anyway. It’s not just me thinking stuff like this.

Valerie in Brooklyn texted yesterday and said, “What the fuck is going on with this weather?? What are they doing to us now?? We always have heat in NYC in the summer, but it’s nothing like this. I can’t even breathe.”

Well, I digress a bit.

Today is the final day of the heatwave, although the weather won’t be really enjoyable until the middle of next week. But just getting these temperatures out of the 90s will be such a relief. (And I’m not talking about music or fashion, because, you know, the 90s were kinda cool — if I can mix metaphors all over the place.)

**************

Okay!

The shooting range sent out an email this morning, a reminder that a new shooting club starts there today. So I won’t be going to the range today, either. All the lanes will be filled up during the time when I usually go.

And it means I won’t be going to town to visit those clients who are in rehab until maybe Thursday.

Which means ANOTHER day to sit and work on the novel!! Yay!!

What a blessing, gang. To suddenly have all this time (unbearably hot as it’s been) to sit and work on the novel. It has been such a long time. And FYI — all the sections and songs we will be working on for the rehearsals of the play (in 2 weeks!!!) are already completed. So I get to just truly focus on the novel. It feels so great.

*******************

Nick Cave sent out a really incredible Red Hand File this morning. At least, it moved me a whole lot. Even though he was referencing what he does spiritually to prepare to go on stage (and then blow people the fuck away!), it resonated with me so much — how it feels to go into my clients’ homes and face life, mortality, love, loss, the quality of being human — and all the people from my own past and from my clients’ pasts who “show up” in spirit and spend time with us while I’m there.

He said, in part:

“…I appeal to these individuals, and many more, much like a devout person might petition the saints for assistance. I remember all these people and I feel a deep spiritual empowerment, so that when I take to the stage, I am carried along by this unearthly fraternity and their special powers. For me, this is an immense strength – an energy that illuminates what is truly meaningful and what is not. Communing with the dead is, in that respect, as clarifying an exercise as anything can be. We are quickly reminded of what matters and what does not. …”

You can read it in full here.

[Below, a photo of an old friend of Nick’s who just passed away.]

***************

All righty!

Laundry got done yesterday. And the light housecleaning got done, too! And the backed-up water can sit in the tub for now (I have another shower downstairs), so this means I’m going to get back to The Curse of Our Profound Disorder.

Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

******************

Blast from the 90s past, gang!

“Pass the Dutchie”, 1995, from the album Thump’ N Reggae Jamz by Musical Youth. Stay cool and enjoy, gang!!

Beating the Heat!!

June 23, 2025 marilyn jaye lewis Leave a comment

Sort of, anyway.

I took some of those freezer-pack thingies from the freezer last night, wrapped them in cotton tea towels and brought them up here for the kittens to sleep on top of and they love them.

So that makes me feel a lot better. They were really suffering from the heat in here.

Luckily, I have a ton of those freezer-packs. I get them whenever I buy something perishable from my favorite local health food store !!!

Also, just to keep the kittens occupied during the heatwave–

I moved a baby grand piano into my room. They love playing on it!! And I get to listen to some really soothing music while I work on the novel…

Anyway.

Yes, it’s fucking HOT. But somehow, I’m dealing with it. I currently have 3 fans in here.

And what’s frustrating is that, the minute you leave this room, the rest of the house is not that bad — 17 open windows, and ceiling fans; the air really circulates. I did my yoga out in the hallway yesterday and it was fine.

I am so tempted to just open the bedroom door and see what Little Blackie would do — would she keep on attacking the other cats, now that the kittens are a lot older? If she does, it’s just too hot right now to deal with the pandemonium that would ensue so I’m afraid to find out.

*************

Well, yesterday was really something.

I had that new client who is a retired minister. He has cognitive impairment, along with some other intense health issues. But the wife was there the entire time, taking care of him. They were both really nice people.

And of course it broke my heart — the wife’s full-time occupation now is taking care of her husband. They have a beautiful home but since she has no time for anything else, the house is sort of an absolute wreck. (I see that all the time now, too.) And I can’t help but think of what the house was like when they first moved in — when they were younger, celebrated holidays with family, etc. It must have been so beautiful in that house.

And things like that always make me wonder what will happen to my own house as I get older and older; will I stop being able to take care of it?? And then I miss the days when I was younger, whether or not I was married, I always had dinner parties. Always entertained. That part of my life is already over.

So it was another one of those emotionally intense evenings for me, since, as always, God stepped in.

The wife had also studied at a seminary (a very well known one in Ohio), so we had some conversations about Biblical Archeology and other unexpected topics, since all three of us had studied for the ministry in one capacity or another.

Then midway through my shift, she asked if I minded watching the movie, “Fiddler on the Roof.” I was absolutely fine with it! I love that musical — it was a favorite of mine when I was growing up, since it’s a thoroughly Jewish musical.

But I wasn’t prepared for how it would make me feel — the memories it would bring back — watching that movie all these years later. I’ve seen the play many times, but I only saw the film once — with my family, back when it opened in theaters in the fall of 1971 (!!).

A time when my entire extended family was still very, very Jewish. But my parents were already constantly fighting with each other, and I was already getting deep into my own private world. Constantly retreating into it, because my mother’s rage was pretty much off the charts all the time back then.

And yet… all these years later. Just the memory of being in the car with my family, as we drove home from the movie — a movie I had absolutely loved, since I already knew all the songs by heart.

And now, basically everyone in my family is dead. This was over 50 years ago (!!). how does it happen, gang? The flying of time.

I kept these feelings to myself while watching the movie, because I am there strictly for their needs, not to burden them with my own drama.

But when this scene (below) came on — it floored me. I still know this song by heart, and I played it a lot on our record player when I was a little girl but I hadn’t thought of it in years. Not only that, but our family– the entire extended family — always honored the Sabbath by lighting the Shabbat candles back then and saying the Hebrew prayers.

I got really choked up while watching this and I had to of course act like nothing was wrong at all– “Sabbath Prayer”:

And when this song came on — forget about it!! Luckily, it’s just a really moving song, whether or not you’re Jewish, and even the Minister and his wife got a little choked up, too — “Sunrise, Sunset”:

Well, one of the many feelings I was feeling as I left their home last night, was how grateful I was that when my dad died, he had no cognitive impairment at all. He remembered me right up util he went into the coma.

His last words to me on the phone were: “Don’t come today! I’m not feeling very well.”

Later that day, he was in the coma and the hospice nurse was telling me that I’d better get there as soon as possible…

*************

Okay.

Today, I think I will stick around the house, enjoy the oppressive heatwave and work on the novel — and also get some light housecleaning done.

Tomorrow, the Agency would like me to stop in at the rehab and visit those 2 clients of mine who are in there because it looks like they’ll be in there a long time… The shooting range is on the way to the rehab, oddly enough, so I guess tomorrow will be about that.

***************

Oh my god!!

I just turned around and saw this! The poor little things. It is really HOT.

***********

Last night in Hamburg! Several photos this time from the 2nd night of sold out shows. Nick Cave and Colin Greenwood.

The next show is on Wednesday, in Rochefort, France. Tickets are still available for that one. Buy them here.

************

Enjoy your Monday, gang, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visting.

I love you guys. See ya!

*************

I leave you with another great one from “Fiddler on the Roof” !!

“Miracle of Miracles”. Enjoy, gang.

“Miracle of Miracles”

Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles-
God took up Daniel once again,
Stood by his side and- miracle of miracles-
Walked him through the lion’s den!

Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles-
I was afraid that God would frown,
But like he did so long ago, at Jericho,
God just made a wall fall down!

When Moses softened Pharaoh’s heart, that was a miracle.
When God made the waters of the Red Sea part, that was a miracle too!
But of all God’s miracles large and small,
The most miraculous one of all
Is that out of a worthless lump of clay,
God has made a man today.

Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles-
God took the tailor by the hand
Turned him around and- miracle of miracles- Led him to the promised land!

When David slew Goliath (yes!), that was a miracle.
When God gave us manna in the wilderness, that was a miracle too.
But of all God’s miracles large and small,
The most miraculous one of all
Is the one I thought could never be:
God has given you to me.

c- 1964 – Jerry Bock, Sheldon Harnick