Tag Archives: The Curse of Our Profound Disorder

A great day, all the way around!

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Even though I also think it’s a great day for popcorn (!), I still think it’s a really great day for the world, any way you want to look at it. (When oh when are people gonna stop hating DJT???)

I guess we shall see.

Freed hostages. Wars over.

If you missed Phil’s urgent video on telegram last night, it’s here. And he says, in part, that after Oct. 19th, silver will begin to skyrocket.

Loyal readers of this lofty blog will no doubt recall that back in late 2022 thru early 2024, when I was making a lot more money, I bought whatever silver I could afford every month. Yay.

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In other celebratory parts of the world — here in the Hinterlands…

If you missed my post from yesterday afternoon, I did indeed finish my final read-thru of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder and this morning, I will be sending the file off to the publisher in Pennsylvania. And from there, we shall see what she thinks.

I am so happy that it is done (at least the first draft). And I am still really happy with the book, but I still think it is a really strange, often brutal and intense book, with an oddly simple message: Family is everything. (And I actually really believe that.)

This picture has nothing to do with the book…

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In other celebratory news (at least for now)–

I saw my caregiving schedule for the rest of the year, and after this month is over, I am scheduled only 24 hrs a week, 2 days off each week, I have Thanksgiving, Christmas Day and New Year’s Day off, and I get home mid-afternoon on the night before Thanksgiving, and on Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve!

Can you believe this, gang?? Wow. All it took was a little polite complaining to the regional supervisor (twice).

This doesn’t mean they won’t ask me to pick up extra shifts along the way, but I can always say no to those if I want to.

This is such a relief to me psychologically, gang. You have no idea.

I bought these shoes in a thrift store in Manhattan — vintage Gucci. Aren’t they cool??

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Okay, here’s this–

The final installment of James Tabor’s series about the disappearance of Jesus’s family from the New Testament.

The Fading of the Jesus Family: Finale and Summing Up (38 mins):

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And here’s some more fading-away news that I’m actually really excited about:

MTV is over, gang. It, too, is quietly fading away…Well, not from the New Testament, from the world.

Wow. Did I used to love MTV….but that was a really long time ago. (Like, 40 years ago.)

“Money For Nothing”

I want my, I want my MTV
I want my, I want my MTV
I want my, I want my MTV
I want my, I want my MTV

Now look at them yo-yos, that’s the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain’t working, that’s the way you do it
Money for nothing and your chicks for free
Now that ain’t working, that’s the way you do it
Lemme tell ya, them guys ain’t dumb
Maybe get a blister on your little finger
Maybe get a blister on your thumb

We got to install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We got to move these refrigerators
We got to move these colour TVs

See the little faggot with the earring and the make-up?
Yeah buddy, that’s his own hair
That little faggot got his own jet airplane
That little faggot, he’s a millionaire

We got to install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We got to move these refrigerators
We got to move these colour TVs
Hoover mover, uh

Got to install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
He’s gotta move these refrigerators
Got to move these colour TVs
Looky here, look out

I should a learned to play the guitar
I should a learned to play them drums
Look at that mama, she got it sticking in the camera
Man, we could have some
And he’s up there, what’s that? Hawaiian noises?
He’s banging on the bongos like a chimpanzee
Oh, that ain’t working, that’s the way you do it
Get your money for nothing, get your chicks for free

We got to install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We got to move these refrigerators
We got to move these colour TVs

Listen here
Now that ain’t working, that’s the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain’t working, that’s the way you do it
Money for nothing, and your chicks for free

Money for nothing, chicks for free
Get your money for nothing, chicks for free
Money for nothing, chicks for free
Money for nothing, chicks for free
Money for nothing, chicks for free
Money for nothing, chicks for free
Ow, money for nothing, yeah
And the chicks for free
What’s that?
Get your money for nothing, and your chicks for free
Look at that, look at that
Get your money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
Bozos
Chicks for free (I want my MTV)
Money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
And chicks for free (I want my MTV)
Get your money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
Chicks for free (I want my MTV)
Ah, money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
Chicks for free (I want my MTV)
Easy, easy money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
Easy, easy, chicks for free (I want my MTV)
Easy, easy money for nothing (I want my, I want my)
Chicks for free (I want my MTV)
That ain’t working

Money for nothing, chicks for free
Money for nothing, chicks for free

c – 1985 Gordon Matthew Sumner, Mark Knopfler

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Okay.

I have today off. I might be hearing from Sandra but I’m not sure yet. If I do, that alone could make me suddenly very busy. We shall see.

I have a couple quick chores to do, but other than that — all I need to do is think about which work-in-progress I want to tackle next around here. What a great feeling. Making progress on everything.

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And that is it for now.

I’m gonna finish up the laundry, get another cup o’ joe, and then get that manuscript off to the publisher.

Enjoy your very happy Monday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Here’s hoping for a beautiful day

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Yesterday was — I don’t know — intense?

I didn’t really move from my desk yesterday, except to do yoga at the end of the day. I forced myself to even do that because I knew my body needed it. I was not 100%. (I am fine today, so I think the yoga helped.)

Luckily, my brain was fine yesterday so I was able to do some tweaking to the final chapter of the novel (like, about 6 hours’ worth of tweaking on 5 pages). I will take one more look at the ending this morning, before beginning the process of reading the manuscript from start to finish.

This is it, btw! 253 pages, just under 75K words.

As I was editing yesterday, I kept looking at the clock because I was worrying about my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man. I had called in sick yesterday, and I kept wondering how his day was going with a different caregiver (he doesn’t usually do too well with strangers). But I was convincing myself that everything was going okay with him.

And then, after what would have been about 2 hours into my shift with him, the Agency called me. Apologizing for calling me when I’m home sick. But the new caregiver couldn’t get my client to answer the front door. She couldn’t get in. For over 2 hours. He won’t answer the phone. They are ready to call Welfare Services to go in and make sure he is all right…

For fuck’s sake. The caregiver hadn’t even read the client’s case notes. He never, ever, EVER answers the front door. You have to let yourself in the backway. He was probably still sound asleep in bed, and without his hearing aids in, he can’t hear anything — not the doorbell, not the phone ringing.

Instead of standing there and panicking for 2 hours, read the fucking notes! Jeez.

Well, anyway. That kind of upset me…

And I had to keep reminding myself that I have my own life, too, and to re-focus on the manuscript.

When an hour went by and they hadn’t called me back, I knew everything was fine and I could just move forward. But it is hard for me — especially with that specific client — to create a line where my private life starts.

But I am at least that much closer to sending the manuscript off to the publisher. I am really, really curious to see how the book reads now, from start to finish.

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Okay.

Here’s this!

Keith, backstage in Kansas City, 1981!

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And here’s this!!

In case you forgot!!

Yes. The coolest fucker.

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And here’s this.

This is actually part of what James Tabor talked about in his lecture during the New Testament Conference on the Historical Jesus last weekend.

Did Jesus Predict His Suffering and Death Or Was that Added After the Fact? (44 mins):

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And honestly, I think that’s it for now.

I want to get back to the ending of the book before I have to leave for my shift with the retired Minister and his lovely cat & wife! (But I have tomorrow off again (!!), and then after that, I begin a really insane month of caregiving.)

Oh! But I texted my Q-following friend and told her: help! I need something fun to look forward to! So on Saturday, Oct. 18th, after my shift, she and I are meeting for lunch HERE!! Yay!

Okay! Enjoy your Sunday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you with this, for a beautiful slow moving Sunday.

From the album, Hypnotic Eye, Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, 2014.

“Full Grown Boy”. Enjoy, gang.

“Full Grown Boy”

I like to move on sure and easy
Like a cat creeps through the grass
And the full moon seems to know me
‘Cause I’ve found myself at last
And I’m a full-grown boy

And there’s laughter on the hillside
From voices far away
How am I gonna tell her that I love her?
When this might not be the day
And I’m a full-grown boy

Yeah
My mind floats away
Yeah
And I’m changing every day

Can you see her in the firelight
Hear how soft and low she sings
How am I gonna tell her that I love her?
When words don’t mean a thing
And I’m a full-grown boy

c- 2014 Tom Petty

An Unexpected Saturday

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Yesterday was strange as heck, gang.

If you saw my post from yesterday morning, I mentioned being really tired.

Well, it spiraled down from there. And even though my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man had an INCREDIBLE time at our lunch at the clubhouse, the shift absolutely wore me out. Plus, driving to his house, then the drive to the clubhouse, then back to his house, then back to my own house — 100 miles of driving for me. (On top of being responsible for the wellbeing of a 95-year-old man for 4 hours…)

By the time I got home yesterday, I could barely move and I could barely think straight. (Oh, and LUCKILY (!) my lawncare guy was here when I got home, trimming my hedges for the end of the season. And I was then forced to try to converse with him coherently for a few minutes. Yay!)

Anyway. Luckily, he’s spoken to me before, so he knows I’m not usually out of my fucking mind.

Well, as the evening went on, and after I had dinner, etc., I still wasn’t any better so I decided last night that I’d better call off for today and give the Agency time to find a replacement for me for this morning.

So I have today off.

I feel a lot better today, but I’m moving really slowly. Trying to regain my focus. My life beyond being a caregiver. And I think the “feeling better” part comes from knowing I can just sit at my desk today and do some tweaking on the novel.

Now I don’t have to be anywhere until late tomorrow afternoon, when I go to my shift with the retired Minister and his wife (and cat).

Oh, and remember how, yesterday, I had made up my mind to tell the Agency next week that I need to drop that one account that I just don’t have the stamina for?

Guess who contacted the Agency, saying what a wonderful caregiver I was? That I was so gentle and patient? Yes. The very same client.

Ack!!

So, obviously, that’s beautiful. But now I can’t really tell the Agency to remove them from my schedule…

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So on we go.

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Okay, well at least there is THIS!!

From Instagram this morning!! Wow.

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And now I’m going to go down to the kitchen and get another cup o’Joe —

–and take a look at this novel that’s on my laptop!! (and btw — I got an email from the publisher yesterday, saying that she was “very excited to review this manuscript”, so I really wanna get at it. And get it off to her!)

Okay. Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you with this. Just’ cause it still keeps me hanging in there. Okay. See ya.

What A Relief!

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Wow, even though I know I will need to tweak the pages I wrote yesterday, it feels incredible to have finally finished that novel!

I already alerted the publisher that I will be sending over the manuscript soon, but first I will have to read through it again from start to finish, and make sure it all holds together by the end.

And I’ll also be sending it over to Wayne. And I will be eager to hear his response, since he is always honest with me. And has basically read everything I’ve ever written.

Wayne, reading basically everything I’ve ever written.

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And not only did I spend about 7 hours on the novel yesterday, I spent an additional TWO HOURS on the phone with Sandra.

Things in that part of my world are going to get really busy soon, and that is a double-relief — regarding finally having finished the novel. I am really going to need the brain-space to be able to focus.

(I will talk more about that incredible project when I can, gang.)

Meanwhile, she has a quick theater piece that she’ll be doing at the end of October, but I didn’t get enough notice, so I can’t get to NYC to see it. So I’m a little disappointed.

But I have decided that next week, I’m going to talk to my supervisor at the Agency again and, even though I really hate to do it, I’m going to ask to be removed from one of my accounts because it takes too much time and energy for me. I just don’t have the stamina for it. I have to be able to focus on the writing now, too.

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I don’t really have much to say today, gang. I’m sort of wiped out from yesterday — but in a good way. I’m wiped out but I feel such a sense of relief.

And pretty soon here, I have to leave for town and get my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man ready for our adventure at the clubhouse!! (I’m hoping that his private nurse had him shave yesterday, because he really hates shaving and he really needed a shave when I was over there on Wednesday. We shall soon see!)

But it’s a perfect fall day here today and I feel pretty confident that we’re going to have a really great adventure!

The glorious clubhouse!!

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I want to mention here — if you’re a long-time reader of this lofty blog, you might remember this episode in my life during the vax crisis a few years ago, when I was the night manager at the old train station-turned bar/coffee shop.

I met a young woman there who had recently had a miscarriage after her mom had forced her to get the c*vid vax. And then after that, her menstrual cycle was totally screwed up and she could not get pregnant again. She was devastated and when she went to her doctor to tell him (rather emotionally) that the vax had killed her baby and totally fucked up her body, he wound up committing her to a psych ward for 72 hours (!!). (They literally carted her away against her will.)

By the time she and I met, she was in a really bad place, emotionally. But when she told me what had happened to her, I got her on an intensive natural supplement protocol to detox her body from the vax right away.

Within 2 months, her menstrual cycle got back to normal and she was thrilled. Just really, really happy.

And yesterday, I’m very happy to say, she gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl. Yay.

(I think this guy is smiling with me right now, from wherever he is.)

Jack Red Eagle, Lakota Sioux Medicine Man

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And I think that’s it.

And in the back of my brain, I’m waiting to see which project I will undertake next — aside from my work with Sandra, that is. I have 2 memoirs in progress, 3 additional novels in progress, and a memoir that I haven’t even started yet, but that I’ve been making notes on for over a year already.

So we shall see.

Enjoy your Friday, gang, wherever you are in the world!

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you with this!

Strange as it may seem, but in its own way, it fueled the final pages of The Curse of Our Profound Disorder.

Michael Jackson, “In Our Small Way”, 1972. From his wonderful album, Got To Be There. Enjoy, gang.

“In Our Small Way”

Maybe you and I can’t do great things
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today
In our small way

Empty words are not enough
Where there’s hurt, we’ll be a crutch
When there’s thirst, we’ll fill each other’s cup
Because we care, we love
Enough to share (Enough to share)

[Chorus]
Maybe you and I can’t do great things (Do great things)
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today (Today)
In our small way

In despair, we’ll be the hope (Be the hope)
And the prayer that frees the soul (Frees the soul)
We’ll be there to share each lonely road (Lonely road)
Because we love, I know (I know)
We care enough, yeah (We care enough)

[Chorus]
Maybe you and I can’t do great things (Do great things)
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today (Today)
In our small way

[Bridge]
Just a little time is all it takes (Just a little time is all it takes)
What a difference just a smile can make, you’ll see (We’ve got)
Love is all we need (We’ve got love, yeah)

[Chorus]
Maybe you and I can’t do great things
We may not change the world in one day
(But we still) But we still can change some things today
In our small way
(La-la-la la-la-la-la-la) Ooh
(La-la-la-la la-la-la la-la) Ooh
(La-la)
(La-la la-la la-la-la-la-la)
(La-la-la-la la-la-la la-la)

c – 1972 Elliot Willensky, Christine Yarian, Beatrice Verdi

Let’s Get this Party Started!

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Somewhere. please. Let’s have a party already. So much cool stuff is happening! (But we’re not supposed to talk about it…)

Anyway.

I will just quickly post again that I am doing my very best to NOT TOUCH this current psyop. It seems exceedingly apparent that they want to push the chaos as far as they possibly can. The world over.

Hence, Phil’s really strange and (IMO intentionally) frustrating livestream last night. (You can watch it here.)

Personally, I am relying on Mike King right now, because he is quick and to the point (i.e., his latest: Fake Bibi Denies Fake Murder of Ch*rlie K**k). And Mike King doesn’t seem to be invested in this seeming mandate to push the chaos instead (although he does indeed acknowledge it.).

But on a slightly different note — I found this next bit extremely exciting.

FakeNews7 reposted it from Derek Johnson yesterday. It is really long so I’m only copying the part I liked best (since, obviously, I have basically invested my entire career in protecting the 1st Amendment):

“…But the importance is this is an Emergency Power by the President.

Restricting Telecommunications.

Title 47: Telecommunications.

PDJT has posted twice the Appeals Court upheld the Ban on Associated Press from being at White House and MAR.

Schiff confirms this.

A confirmation is more than the confirmation of the AP.

That’s confirmation of the Wartime Order in place.

47 United States Code §606 is titled: WAR POWERS of the President.

If they’re upholding a ban in 2025… it means the ban was put into place long before.

PDJT has HAMMERED ABC, NBC, CNN, PBS, NPR, and now they’re working on MSNBC.

The only way employees can be fired via a Freedom of Speech / Press is under a WARTIME ORDER.…”

[the full post is here]

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Okay. Onward.

Well, I’m a little bit frustrated because my new blue-light-blocking reader glasses already broke! The right side arm thingie snapped in two last night. And it turned out it was not easy to fix and now they are extremely uncomfortable to wear.

I’ve already ordered another pair — different company. Although I did read a lot of comments that these types of glasses, in general, break really easily.

I’m not going to get too upset about it, though. Because the main thing is that these blue-light-blocking readers have a made a HUGE difference in my eyes. And so quickly. And I’m just so glad to have them at all — even the broken ones. (And they are not expensive.)

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I’ve been wanting to post about this for a few days, but kept getting overwhelmed by my actual life. (As a caregiver, that is.)

Anyway.

It is a free online book event, one-hour. It will be recorded if you can’t attend the whole thing.

It is being offered by Internet Archives. It is FREE, 1 hr. Thursday, Sept. 25 at 1PM Eastern time.

Book Talk: After Disruption: A Future For Cultural Memory

“The digital age is burning out our most precious resources and the future of the past is at stake. In After Disruption: A Future for Cultural Memory, Trevor Owens warns that our institutions of cultural memory—libraries, archives, museums, humanities departments, research institutes, and more—have been “disrupted,” and largely not for the better. He calls for memory workers and memory institutions to take back control of envisioning the future of memory from management consultants and tech sector evangelists…” (more at link below)

Get your FREE ticket here.

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This photo alone made my entire evening!

An update from Wayne’s outing with his brothers yesterday:

Honestly, I cannot believe these guys are all officially in their 70s now. When Wayne and I first got married, they were all in their late 30s…

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And here’s this!

First–

Keith, in Berlin in 1973:

And second–

I kept forgetting to post this, too:

The Rolling Stones Have 13 New Songs Ready — A Mysterious Album Is “Nearly Finished” — (3 minutes)

“The Stones aren’t done yet. Insiders confirm that 13 brand-new tracks have already been recorded for their next album. Mick Jagger says they’re “three-quarters through,” while Marlon Richards insists it’s “nearly finished.” No title, no artwork, no release date — just the silence before the storm. When it drops, it won’t just be an album. It will be an event.”

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And the good news on the caregiving front is that my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man’s family goes back home this morning.

So life gets back to normal today. (They’re coming back in October, but we’ll deal with that in October.)

I’m anticipating a quiet day with him today. We shall soon see.

The Agency asked me to pick up a new client on Monday, my day off, and since I need the money, I said okay. The drive there and back is on one of those really beautiful backroads here in Muskingum County, so that part will be nice, except that it’s supposed to rain on Monday. But we’ll see how it goes.

It will probably be pretty even in the rain, right?

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And I think that is it for now.

Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Driving to town music from yesterday!

Yes, I’m still playing the soundtrack to Pack Up the Planation LIVE 1985, by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers.

They do a great live version of this song — written by John & Joan Sebastian, but the Everly Brothers had a hit with it in 1972.

“The Stories We Could Tell”. Live, by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, at the Hammersmith Odeon, London, 1985. Enjoy, gang!

“The Stories We Could Tell”

Talkin’ to myself again
Wondering if this travelin’ is good
Is there something better we’d be doing if we could
And oh the stories we could tell
And if this all blows up and goes to hell
I can still see us sittin on the bed in some motel
Listenin’ to the stories we could tell

Remember that guitar in a museum in Tennessee
And the nameplate on the glass brought back twenty melodies
And the scratches on the face
Told of all the times he fell
Singin’ every story he could tell
And oh the stories it could tell
And I bet you it still rings like a bell
And I wish we could sit back on the bed in some motel
And listen to the stories we could tell

So if you’re on the road tracking down here every night
And you’re singin’ for a livin’ ‘neath the brightly colored lights
And if you ever wonder why you ride this carousel
You did it for the stories you could tell
And oh the stories we could tell

And if this all blows up and goes to hell
I can still see us sittin on the bed in some motel
Listenin’ to the stories we could tell
I can still see us sittin on the bed in some motel
Listenin’ to the stories we could tell

c- 1972 – John and Joan Sebastian

Yes, Today’s the Big Day!

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Wherein I drive to a really beautiful small town, 30 miles from here, called Coshocton. And I have my very first doctor’s appointment in 24 years….

Not the doctor’s office…just a random shot of Coshocton

And even though it is another really stunning day here and the drive will be gorgeous, I will be very, very happy when the appointment is over.

I’m going to smile and be cheerful and cooperative, though, and not act like a Big-Pharma-Medical-Mafia-hating Conspiracy Theorist…

Me. Faking it.

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So, this morning has been interesting. Guess who I heard from for the first time in 17 months??

The woman who is the actual owner of 5 of my cats. The ones that I call the “foster cats”.

It was really good to hear from her, primarily because I had feared the worst — that maybe she had passed away. I won’t go into why I thought that.

But she and her husband are getting their lives together now and will soon have an apartment of their own.

It would mean that all of their stuff would finally be out of my barn. And it of course would also mean that 5 of the cats will be out of my home.

Of course it breaks my heart, because now I love all of them, but it would also be a relief. Obviously. I have way too many cats.

We’ll see, though. Just because I heard from her, doesn’t mean I will hear from her again.

Me, most days.

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Yesterday was a rough one, gang.

I was with my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man, and if you’ve read yesterday’s post, you know that he has family at the house this week, pretending to “winterize” his house, when really they are trying to fix it up to get it easier to get the house on the real estate market basically the minute he dies.

It is astounding to me that they don’t see that he totally knows what they’re doing. They don’t see what they’re putting him through, emotionally.

The only thing that’s “wrong” with him is short term memory loss. He can still perceive things. It was so hard for me to not show the family how angry I was with how they’re going about all this.

When I got there, there was total chaos all around the outside of the house, but he was inside, dressed, and sitting in his chair in the living room. He smiled and quietly said to me, “Get me away from them.”

So off we went to Peony Bistro for sashimi and sake, then we went to the Nature Preserve and just sat in the car for an hour. And he told me everything that he fears is getting ready to happen. And most of his fears, I felt, were kind of right on the money…

I won’t go into all of it, but thankfully, my Supervisor from the Agency called me when I got home yesterday, so that I could “update her” while getting everything off my chest (and eventually calm down). She was so supportive.

Yes, he is losing his interest in living. But that doesn’t mean take his house right out from under him. (His house and property are worth a fortune.)

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Okay.

This arrived in the mail yesterday!

In the recent zoom call with his private Patreon group, James Tabor spent some time going over this film from 2002.

It aired on the History Channel (2002), and it was directed by Simcha Jacobovici, who is a close friend and colleague of James Tabor’s, and whose work I really enjoy.

Even though a lot of things have come to light about this ossuary since 2002 (great things!), I am still looking forward to watching it.

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But meanwhile, I am re-watching THIS and just loving it:

Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers – Pack Up the Plantation Live! 1985 (1 hr 37 mins):

And I’m also listening to the soundtrack of it in my car. (Yes, I am no longer listening to “songs I played a lot 6 years ago” but that does not mean I graduated past 1985…)

When Tom Petty sang live he was incredible. He usually gave a whole different emotional spin to his songs than what came across on the studio recordings. And the songs still sound so immediate and personal — and like he hasn’t been dead for almost 8 years already.

This track, where he (and the audience) sing “Breakdown” is really well known, but I especially love all the stuff he says/sings at the end!

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And I listened to this while getting dinner ready last night and I thought it was fantastic. I especially loved the part about “Now.” (At about the 6-minute mark) (Ignore the title, that’s just click-bait.)

🌟 Get Ready for WILD Blessings – The Universe Is About to Amaze You 👑 Abraham Hicks 2025 (15 mins):

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And here’s this!!

For no reason. Just because!!

Nick Cave.

This will absolutely NOT be my attitude in the doctor’s office today!!

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Phil is planning to go live tonight at 9PM, but check here later to confirm!

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And that is it for now. I need to get some stuff done before heading out to Coshocton.

And then once I’m back from Coshocton, I hope to get some writing done!!

Enjoy your Thursday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Yes, as you saw yesterday, my breakfast-listening music is not too different from what I’m listening to in the car right now!!

Breakfast-listening music!!

From 2015. A collection of Live Radio Broadcasts from the 1970s. And I’m mainly listening to the 3rd CD right now, because it has a lot of live duets with Bob Dylan.

Since it is essentially Fall now, I decided it was time to move on from The Monkees and go back to Tom Petty.

When he played live, he covered a lot of songs that had been hits by other artists. Here he sings with Bob Dylan — a favorite song of mine by John Hiatt & Ry Cooder, “Across the Borderline.” Enjoy, gang.

“Across the Borderline”

There’s a place where I’ve been told
Every street is paved with gold
And it’s just across the borderline
And when it’s time to take your turn
Here’s a lesson that you must learn
You could lose more than you’ll ever hope to find

[Chorus]
When you reach the broken promised land
And every dream slips through your hands
Then you’ll know that it’s too late to change your mind
‘Cause you’ve paid the price to come so far
Just to wind up where you are
And you’rе still just across the borderline

Up and down thе Rio Grande
A thousand footprints in the sand
Reveal a secret no one can define
The river flows on like a breath
In between our life and death
Tell me, who’s the next to cross the borderline?

[Chorus]
And when you reach the broken promised land
Every dream slips through your hands
And you’ll know it’s too late to change your mind
‘Cause you pay the price to come so far
Just to wind up where you are
And you’re still just across the borderline
Now you’re still just across the borderline

c – 1982 John Hiatt, Ry Cooder, Jim Dickinson

All righty! Happy Wednesday!

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Wow, yesterday was so amazing around here.

But first, here’s this:

A friend over in Newark sent me this shot she took of the candlelight vigil in the Square last night. It looks like it was a complete success!

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And before I forget–

Phil is supposed to be going live tonight, starting at 10PM eastern time. Be sure to check here later to confirm.

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Nick Cave was back with his Red Hand Files yesterday! And what a great one it was, too. Brief, but he explained everything he’s been up to during his break from the Files, and he said the Red Hand Files is now officially 7 years old (!!) — and also, he answered a question about love & freedom, saying in part:

“I thought on your question, Mies, ‘Did love mean freedom to me?’ I reflected on the things that matter most to me on this earth – my family, friends, those within my sphere of influence, my music, my writing, my spiritual life, and the health of the world in general, all these elements that, together, constitute a life lived lovingly. Mies, these things seem far from freedom. Instead, they are forms of containment that place demands upon us, sometimes greatly so. The pursuit of love involves feelings of duty and responsibility, as well as sacrifice, hard work, resilience, patience, forgiveness, and understanding. These are the structural bonds within which supreme love can flourish…“

You can read it in full HERE.

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Tomorrow, I ostensibly have another day off.

However.

Since being put on Medicare when I turned 65, I now have to have “a doctor.” And since next Thursday, a nurse from the insurance company is coming to my house to give me my “annual check-up” (insurance-speak for “we might not want to insure you if you don’t let us come over”), I have to have the doctor in place by then.

I am not a fan of traditional medicine, as all of you probably know by now. And I have not been to a doctor in 24 years. But back when I was on Welfare — during the fake lockdowns — they put me on Medicaid and assigned me a doctor “near me”. (30 miles away.)

When I was finally able to get off Welfare, I looked into the doctor they had assigned me and I actually liked his credentials! He has a degree from the University of Pikeville, in Kentucky (!!), where most of my ancestors are from. And more importantly — the University of Pikeville teaches Osteopathic Medicine (and is connected to a Presbyterian Church). (FYI: “Osteopathic medicine is a distinct branch of healthcare that emphasizes the body’s inherent ability to heal itself. “)

So I made a note of the doctor’s name and phone number, etc., and decided that if I was ever forced to have a doctor, he would be it.

University of Pikeville, in Kentucky.

And now that I’m forced to have a doctor, when insurance/medical-type people ask me who my doctor is, I always say him but I haven’t actually ever met him.

But tomorrow afternoon, I will be meeting him. Officially. And he will become “my doctor.” So that everything can go smoothly when the insurance-nurse comes next week. And then they can go back to leaving me alone for another year.

(If you know me AT ALL, you know that I’m just super thrilled about all of this — having to give ANY of my free time to doctors and insurance companies. However, on we go.)

Already waiting for me…

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On a related note…

If you know me at all, then you also know that I am 100% totally into natural healing. And I always have been, even though for the first 40 years of my life, I also went through the motions of “going to doctors”. Then I basically gave up and said, I need a different path…

In my current novel-in-progress, The Curse of Our Profound Disorder, there is a character based in certain key ways on a Lakota Sioux Medicine Man, Jack Red Eagle, that I knew briefly back in the mid-1980s.

At that time, he had left the Reservation in Oklahoma and was living in a cabin in the woods outside of Nacogdoches, TX. And he was a practicing Medicine Man. He was in his early 60s and looking for someone to train to take over his practice. He wanted to retire. He thought I had what it took to be a Medicine Woman.

We corresponded briefly, I went to Texas, it turned out I was really good at it, and it freaked me the fuck out because I was only 24 years old… (plus I was a singer-songwriter in NYC. I couldn’t see myself moving to a cabin in the woods in East Texas to heal people when I hadn’t even learned yet how to heal myself).

Anyway. So I have a character in my novel, created around Jack Red Eagle. And I created that character 26 years ago, when I first started writing (almost all of) this novel.

As I’ve been revising the novel, and moving forward with it, I had toyed with the idea of changing the character’s name to Jake instead of Jack — but I kept coming back to the very strong feeling that the character’s name needed to be Jack (my character is Jack Kicking Eagle, and he’s in his 30s). And as I first read over the novel, after not having read it in 26 years, I was sort of overwhelmed by how spiritual the character was.

Anyway. I have to focus now on the ending of the novel. And so I do a lot of sitting and staring. And yesterday, I kept getting the feeling that I should dig out those old letters from Jack Red Eagle and read over them. I hadn’t read them in 40 years.

So I finally went and dug them out of storage. And WOW. They blew me away. Not just the unbelievable similarities between what the real Jack believed and what my character believes (like, verbatim, after not having read those letters in 40 years), I was also overwhelmed by what a high opinion Jack Red Eagle had had in my mental/spiritual abilities to heal, way back then.

In fact, he had told me that he was certain I had Native American blood in me (because of certain things I was just sort of eerily familiar with), and this was a few years before I met my birth father and discovered I was indeed descended, in part, from the Black Foot Indian Nation in Montana.

I googled Jack Red Eagle yesterday, and found out he had died back in 1992. And he is buried here, in a very, very old cemetery in Nacogdoches:

And then, of course, through all of this, I kept feeling like he was communicating with me (in spirit) and once I found out he was actually dead, then I knew he was.

And then I “found” a photo of him that I didn’t know I had.

And then I found a frame that it fit into and so I framed it and put it on my bedroom wall! (It’s over by my ministerial ordination certifications.)

Anyway. Wow. Suddenly, he was back in my life and I got the profound feeling that it was HIS essence that had been telling me that the character in the novel had to stay as Jack and not be changed to Jake.

And once I saw — after reading over the original letters yesterday — that my character already had all of the real Jack’s beliefs, etc., I was kind of overjoyed about all of it.

Anyway. Long story short:

Jack Red Eagle, back in my life after 40 years!

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Okay, I gotta scoot!!!

I gotta head to town and see my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man. And he has family in town today, “winterizing” the house — and this is making my Japanese man very unhappy. He feels like they just want him to die so they can sell the house…

I’m guessing it will be an emotionally tricky day. I’m hoping to just whisk him off to Peony Bistro, and get sashimi and sake. We’ll see how that goes.

Meanwhile. Have a wonder-filled Wednesday, wherever you are in the world!!

Thanks for visting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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Breakfast-listening music!!

Yes, you guessed it!! Too fucking FUN!! (I have it on a bootleg CD, with better sound quality).

Bob Dylan’s classic, Everybody Must Get Stoned, by Tom Petty live NYC! Enjoy, gang.

It sure is hitting the fan, isn’t it?

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But I am seriously not gonna go there.

I think I have an idea of the script they might be working from, an overview maybe? — they are pushing utter chaos. From all corners. And multiplied by the National Guard already in place in — what? — 19 States?

I’m not touching it. But it’s looking pretty good. IMO.

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Meanwhile.

Here’s more from the Stones in the RCA recording studio in Los Angeles in 1965 (photos by Gered Mankowitz)–

I love how (the late-great) Ian Stewart is looking right at the camera:

And just FYI, Keith was barely 22 years old in 1965!!

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Before I forget–

Ever since I upgraded to the iPhone 16e, my eyes have really been killing me. Even though the phone goes to “night” during the night, I can’t do the “night” setting all day long. It also hurts my eyes. And I have the brightness turned down as low as I reasonably can while still being able to see the screen…

I have a blue-light filter on my laptop, but I can’t find one on the iPhone 16e.

So I bought a pair of those “reader” glasses that filter out blue light and, WOW, gang! Immediately, my eyes felt so much better.

Not while looking at the phone — my eyes didn’t bother me while I was looking at the phone, it was when I was done looking at the phone and trying to live the rest of my life. My eyes were really going downhill fast.

These blue light blockers instantaneously made a difference in how everything looks when I’m done looking at the phone. I am so glad I decided to try them.

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I know, I know, I know, I know, I know.

I said I wasn’t going to keep posting photos of Nick Cave from now until January 17th, when the next tour starts…

But here’s this!

Just so beautiful. And not just the hair…

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And as for everything else…

I got a couple of loads of laundry underway here. And I also have to do some quick vacuuming.

Then it’s all about The Curse of our Profound Disorder until I have to leave for my shift with the retired Minister and his lovely wife later this afternoon!

Then 3 more days off this coming week!

Yes, I have no clue how I can afford to live on 4 shifts a week for the remainder of the month, but I guess we’re gonna find out!!

I really, really, really need to get the novel done, so that I can send it off and then focus on the upcoming projects with Sandra.

And as soon as I can tell you more about all this, I will!

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And I think that’s it.

Have a beautiful Sunday wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you with this!!

Yes, I have now moved to the playlist of “songs I was listening to 6 years ago”. As if 5 years ago wasn’t enough of a mindfuck… (Who on Earth thought up this idea to create playlists of songs I had in heavy rotation so many years ago??)

Well, first off, it’s heavy on the Tom Petty. And Nick Cave. And Lyle Lovett.

But I leave you with this!

Another treasure from my wee bonny girlhood, that apparently I was once again re-visiting heavily when I was 59.

“Father and Son” by Cat Stevens, from his 1970 album, Tea for the Tillerman.

I really, really loved this song when I was about 12, alone in my room. I’m guessing you can readily grasp why. But it’s interesting that all these years later, when it came on the playlist while I was driving to town yesterday — I realized I can still relate, but now from the other side.

Okay. Enjoy, gang,

“Father and Son”

[Father]
It’s not time to make a change
Just relax, take it easy
You’re still young, that’s your fault
There’s so much you have to know
Find a girl, settle down
If you want you can marry
Look at me
I am old, but I’m happy
I was once like you are now
And I know that it’s not easy
To be calm
When you’ve found something going on
But take your time, think a lot
Why, think of everything you’ve got
For you will still be here tomorrow
But your dreams may not

[Son]
How can I try to explain?
When I do, he turns away again
It’s always been the same
Same old story
From the moment I could talk
I was ordered to listen
Now there’s a way
And I know that I have to go away
I know, I have to go

[Father & (Son)]
It’s not time to make a change (Away, away, away)
Just sit down, take it slowly
You’re still young, that’s your fault (I know)
There’s so much you have to go through (I have to make this decision)
Find a girl, settle down (Alone)
If you want you can marry
Look at me (No)
I am old, but I’m happy

[ Son & (Father)]
All the times that I’ve cried (Stay, stay, stay)
Keeping all the things I knew inside
It’s hard
But it’s harder to ignore it (Why must you go)
If they were right, I’d agree (And make this decision)
But it’s them they know, not me (Alone)
Now there’s a way
And I know that I have to go away
I know, I have to go

c – 1970 – Cat Stevens/ Yusuf

Just a quick howdy from the Hinterlands

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If you saw my update from late yesterday afternoon, you can guess that I am in good spirits around here.

I am of course very aware of all that is going on out in the rest of the world. If you have followed this blog for any amount of time, you already know what side I’m on and what I am likely to believe right now.

I think it is an astounding plan and I am quietly amazed by how well it’s going. That’s all I really want to post about it, though.

From Mike King —

“Nice work, ‘Charlie.’ Enjoy your new life.“

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Other than that, things really are quiet around here. But that’s an okay thing.

I’m heading out soon to see my favorite 95-year-old Japanese man. I am trying to get the very most out of every moment with him these days, gang, because he is definitely expressing — in no uncertain terms — that he has had a really wonderful life and he is “ready to go upstairs”. And since his recent 95th birthday, his energy is definitely changing,

His private nurse is trying hard to come up with ways to change his outlook; to re-engage him. But she thinks like a nurse, and I think like a minister. Obviously, I will feel a true emptiness whenever it is that he ends up crossing over. I have enjoyed every single moment of knowing him.

However, I feel it is my duty to him to support his flow, his journey, to simply be beside him in the moments he has left here. Not to fight against his spirit. So my concentration these days is just in being there with him and sharing in all the joy he remembers from a life that has been very well lived.

But it is intense, gang — that moment when I walk in his kitchen door now. One of these days, and obviously we don’t know when, but one of these days everything will be over.

Meanwhile…

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Here’s this.

A fun photo of Keith and Charlie, taken in the RCA recording studio in Los Angeles, in 1965. Photo by Gered Mankowitz.

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And I guess I’m not going to post a photo of Nick Cave every single day between now and January 17th, when the Bad Seeds’ tour of Australia gets underway, so we can just part with this, for now:

Nick and Conway. Doing what we all loved doing back then!

I’m guessing there will be photos on Sept. 23rd. We shall see!

Meanwhile, Autumn is really right around the corner now. Summer is done.

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I’m going to try to get a tiny bit of editing work done on The Curse of Our Profound Disorder before I head to town this morning, so I’m gonna scoot.

Enjoy your Saturday, wherever you are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

I love you guys. See ya!

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I leave you with this!

This song is the ONLY song on the playlist from “songs I was listening to 5 years ago” that was actually a new song 5 years ago!

The absolutely only song! And the playlist lasts one hour.

I really loved the Ghosteen album when it came out. So much. But as time goes on, I just find that it gets sadder and sadder for me, and it is so hard to listen to.

When this song came on, it surprised me that it was on the list. And the intensity of the song was just sort of spellbinding.

Anyway. I leave you with a song that was actually a new song, 5 years ago!

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, “Waiting for You”, 2019. From Ghosteen. Enjoy, gang.

“Waiting for You”

All through the night we drove
And the wind caught her hair
And we parked on the beach
In the cool evening air
Well, sometimes it’s better not to say anything at all

Your body is an anchor
Never asked to be free
Just want to stay in the business
Of making you happy
Well, I’m just waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you

A priest runs through the chapel
All the calendars are turning
A Jesus freak on the street
Says He is returning
Well, sometimes a little bit of faith
Can go a long, long way

Your soul is my anchor
I never asked to be freed
Well, sleep now, sleep now
Take as long as you need
Cause I’m just waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
Waiting for you
To return
To return
To return

c – 2019 Nick Cave

Think

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That’s all I’m going to post about yesterday.

Tonight, Phil goes live at 7PM. Primarily because today is the anniversary of 9-11. But also, because of Charlie Kirk.

Check here later to confirm, but I seriously HOPE he does not cancel.

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Okay.

I’m posting late because Bobby McGee and Freddie McFee had their post-surgery follow-up visit to the vet this morning, and they passed with flying colors.

They are now free to go on with their frisky little lives!

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Okay.

So as of this moment, I have the rest of the day off.

I’ve already taken my walk — and, wow, what a gorgeous morning it is out there. Unbelievable.

I sure could use an afternoon, hanging with my Q-following friend at Tequilaville — yesterday wore us both out.

But as luck would have it, we’re having lunch together on Monday — to belatedly celebrate her recent birthday — at Three Tigers Brewing Co in Granville!! So I’m just going to hang around here today and write.

3 Tigers Brewing Co

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Here’s this.

From Instagram yesterday–

I’m posting this because he was my cousin. He was actually first cousins with my Grandma — my favorite person on Earth. Their fathers were brothers. They all came over from Poland together, in the early 1900s.

Star of stage & screen in the 1930s & 40s, John Garfield:

John Garfield

Oh, and here’s this:

“…Near the end of his life, in an effort to clear his name, Garfield began work on an article for Look magazine, in which he would denounce communism without “naming names”; his lawyer advised him to concede that he had been “duped” into contributing time and money to communist front groups.[11] He then arranged to meet with the FBI to press his case. At the meeting, however, the FBI representatives showed him a dossier on his wife Roberta (known as “Robbe”), which included her old Communist Party membership card and cancelled checks to events sponsored by the party, and said that the FBI would clear him if he signed a statement betraying Robbe as a Communist. Garfield instead responded with an angry expletive and walked out of the meeting.[11] Writer and director Abraham Polonsky, who worked with him on two films, stated that Garfield ‘defended his street boy’s honor and they killed him for it.‘”

[Hmmm… murdered for his alleged politics. Where have we heard that before?]

Oh, and here’s a photo of me and my older brother with my Grandma, my above-mentioned favorite person on Earth, on the shores of Lake Erie, in Cleveland, in 1966.

And just for your information — she was raped to death (her heart exploded) in her hospital bed, after open-heart surgery, at age 89. In Cleveland. My favorite person on Earth.

The shit never stops, does it, gang?

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Onward.

Okay.

From last night’s sold out show in Luxembourg!

The alleged set list, but it seems that sometimes they veer from the official list. Still, the fantastic enocre (sometimes known as “an encore”) continues:

And Nick (and Colin) apparently took in some art yesterday. Here’s Nick:

And also —

Nick with a happy fan yesterday:

No, I’m not going to say a single solitary THING about how short his hair is here… I’m only going to say that whoever is in charge of ensuring his hair is never above his shoulders, needs to be re-assigned to a different task, pronto.

Okay! And from the actual show!!

And tonight, is the FINAL show of the tour!!

I suddenly got extremely tired…

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And here’s this again, just because, gang, you have no idea how much this is helping me move forward around here! It’s taped to my wall now, by my desk, and I read it constantly. And I work on the novel.

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And that’s it for now.

I love you guys. Let’s just hang in there.

And enjoy our Thursday, wherever we are in the world.

Thanks for visiting.

See ya.

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Again, from the playlist of 5 years ago!!

Kind of suits today, doesn’t it?

Don Henley, “The End of the Innocence”. 1989. From the album of the same name. Play it quietly. Look up at the sky. Remember everything you’ve ever known in your life. And then enjoy, gang.

“The End Of The Innocence”

Remember when the days were long
And rolled beneath a deep blue sky
Didn’t have a care in the world
With mommy and daddy standin’ by
But “happily ever after” fails
And we’ve been poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers dwell on small details
Since daddy had to fly

But I know a place where we can go
That’s still untouched by men
We’ll sit and watch the clouds roll by
And the tall grass waves in the wind
You can lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

O’ beautiful, for spacious skies
But now those skies are threatening
They’re beating plowshares into swords
For this tired old man that we elected king
Armchair warriors often fail
And we’ve been poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers clean up all details
Since daddy had to lie

But I know a place where we can go
And wash away this sin
We’ll sit and watch the clouds roll by
And the tall grass waves in the wind
Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair spill all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

Who knows how long this will last
Now we’ve come so far, so fast
But, somewhere back there in the dust
That same small town in each of us
I need to remember this
So baby give me just one kiss
And let me take a long last look
Before we say goodbye

Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

c – 1989 – Don Henley, Bruce Hornsby