Tag Archives: Jesus of the Moon Nick Cave

Legs to Die For!!

And in this humble instance, gang, I am talking about my own!!

Legs, that is.

If you’re on Instagram, like me, perhaps you are bombarded with ads for BetaBrand Dress Yoga Pants.  A couple months ago, I bought a pair of them, because I do yoga, and I also liked how the pants looked in the ad.

Gang, I would never do yoga in these pants! They are just too fucking sexy. They fit like a glove – if you wear gloves all over your legs, I guess. But, seriously, they fit like nobody’s business. I bought a specific style that they don’t seem to sell anymore but they really slide on like a second skin.

My legs are really long to begin with, but these yoga pants make my legs look about 12 feet long. And I bought the boot cut so that I could wear my new (vegan-friendly) cowboy boots with them, and those have a 3-inch stacked heel.  I am over 6 feet tall when I wear those boots. So the combined effect of the boots and the pants are just ridiculous. And I mean that in the best possible way. I look like nothing but long, skinny legs, towering over everybody.

Long story short, this is what I was wearing when I went to the Honda Dealership yesterday and it was un-fucking-believable. There are 2 female employees there and about 50 guys.  And I think every single one of those guys came into my field of vision yesterday.  And I’ve been going there twice a year for 3 years already. Never have I had such attentive service, even when I was there the first day, giving them thousands of dollars in cash. Good to know that long skinny legs still trump hard cold cash. (You know, I wonder, if I’d gone into that sales rep’s little office yesterday, closed the door, called him ‘honey’ and asked him real quietly if I could have some of my cold hard cash back – I wonder what he would have said??!! Perhaps something like, “I’ll try my best to arrange it” ??)

Anyway.

From there, it was off to that journey deeper into the country to go pick up the little clay imprint of Daddycakes’ paw from the vet. What an incredible drive it was.

It was drizzling rain, but still spring, you know, so all the trees everywhere were either in full blossom or that incredible shade of green. I decided to go the back route the whole way. It took me right through the town where the huge lake is, which, in summertime, is a town just insanely exploding with boats and flip-flops and cut-offs and muscle cars and booze and weed and music and hormones.

Yesterday it couldn’t have been more quiet, or more lovely in its springtime stuff and its drizzling rain. I didn’t see a single other person as I drove through the town.  All the little shops and cafes and bars and churches technically open for business, but not a soul was there. And once you drive through the town, it becomes just a winding road through empty cornfields and nothing but sky.

I was playing Jesus of the Moon again, over and over (see yesterday’s post) because the groove just fit. It was all too perfect. Even though the mission I was on was bittersweet – the last time I was out there at that vet’s office, Daddycakes was still alive, though barely. It was still just an awe-inspiring day.

And then I spent the evening working on Blessed By Light and got some really good writing done.

Today Is May 1st, which was not only Elvis’s Wedding Day but mine, as well!! In fact, we got married on May 1st in honor of Elvis and we went to Memphis on our honeymoon. That box of matches featured above is my treasured souvenir from Graceland – even though, by the time we got there that day, the last tour had already left and so we didn’t get to go inside. Got all the way to Graceland, finally, and stood in front of a locked gate!! But what a fine gate it was, gang.

Yes, 26 years ago today, I married my second husband. It lasted 14 years, although I physically left after 10. And even though loyal readers of this lofty blog no doubt recall that I was not any kind of a wife that you’d probably ever want to have, I did try to leave that marriage 3 times in those 10 years. I wasn’t oblivious to the fact that I had a personality that was way too large for that marriage and that i was driving both of us crazy. However, I was always persuaded to stay and to try to make it work. Until it was just way too apparent that to try to live like some sort of Upper West Side happy housewife was driving me out of my fucking mind…

But here’s how I looked on my wedding day, 26 years ago. Long before all the silver hair arrived!!

In honor of Elvis, Marilyn Jaye officially became Marilyn Jaye Lewis on May 1st, 1993!!

Okay, gang!! I’m gonna get back to work on the novel here. Drink a little more coffee, eat some chocolate. I hope you have a wonderful day, wherever you are in the world!!

As a memento of yesterday, I leave you with this heartbreaking song – one of my favorites of all time, when I want to have my heart broken a little bit! (Trust me, even though my marriages don’t work out, I’m still capable of loving with all my soul and missing all the ones who got away.) Okay. Thanks for visiting, gang. I love you! See ya!

Weepy Kind of Morning

I’m gonna leave here soon to make that drive farther out into the country to that veterinarian’s office. He made a little clay paw print of Daddycakes for me and it’s ready for me to pick up.

Daddycakes died over 2 weeks ago already, and his death was so slow and awful that all I felt for several days was just stress. Horrible stress. Even after he was euthanized, I just felt so much stress. When the stress finally subsided, I never went into any type of true grief mode. I had to focus on writing the novel because I need to have it off to a publisher before we start rehearsals for my play this summer, whenever Sandra arrives here from New York and says “let’s begin.”

And as an aside – it is always a huge question mark when Sandra will reply to texts. She’s a working actress and is always working. So I never know when she will find 4 seconds to reply. And the worst is when she suddenly decides to FaceTime me without any warning and I have to take the call because I need some sort of vital information from her but I haven’t washed my hair in, like, 17 days, or something horrible like that. (Please, people!! Don’t FaceTime me!!)

Anyway, on Sunday morning, at 5am, I was lying in my bed in the dark, thinking about life, and suddenly an eerie light filled one corner of my room. It was coming from my iPhone. So I looked at it and there was the text I needed from Sandra. Giving me the information the director had been waiting on for over a week.

I wanted to text right back, but I knew she was in her quiet place. She was probably downstairs in her great room, off the kitchen. The room is so tranquil and surrounded by huge windows, looking out at trees. She was probably the only one awake in the whole, quiet house, with the sun just barely coming up at the edge of the sky, and she was probably just sitting there, thinking about her own life and finally decided to text me. I wanted her to have that solitude for as long as possible.

Anyway.

So. This morning I woke up to a rainy little spring morning, birds singing, the cats playing merrily on the floor around my bed, wanting me to get up and feed them. And that’s when it finally struck me that I was going to make that journey this morning in the rain and all that is left of my wonderfully compassionate stray cat, Daddycakes, is a clay paw print.

It just felt sad.

And from there I have to go to the Honda dealership to get that required maintenance done on my leased car. That always takes hours.  I’m bringing along the script for Burn This by Lanford Wilson, because the play is in a revival now on Broadway and I want to refresh my memory.

I don’t understand why people decide to revive such iconic classics. I really don’t. I’m sure that whoever is in it currently does a great job but no one on Earth can be John Malkovich except John Malkovich. (I know, I know; theater is a living, evolving thing and doesn’t ever stop in time and many, many men have taken on the role since then, but still; when someone nails it so extraordinarily the first time, why permit it to live again? Let’s put it into a special vault in Heaven or something.)

One bright spot in the day, though, is that my Honda Fit’s lease is almost over. And I’m trying to figure out what I want to do next. And there are a couple of used Hellcat’s for sale at that particular Honda dealership that I can actually afford. (See my blog post, “To Heaven in a Hellcat”, that mentions my dream car here.) So I’m gonna try to figure out if I actually want to own my dream car, or if I’d rather go another 3 years without having to worry about any maintenance whatsoever and just lease another Honda Fit.

Either way, it’ll feel good to dream. My brain needs a break.

Then I’ll come home and work on Blessed By Light some more because Chapter 20 is almost done!

All right, gang. I hope you have a sweet and gentle day out there, wherever you are in the world! Thanks for visiting. Today I leave you with this. I think I played it about 40 times, repeatedly, as I was out driving around in the wilderness yesterday. Such a mesmerizing song. Okay. I love you, gang. See ya!

JESUS OF THE MOON

Stepped out of the St. James hotel
And I left you behind curled up like a child
A change is gonna come
And as the door whispered shut
I walked on down the high-windowed hall

You lay sleeping on the unmade bed
The weatherman on the television in the St. James hotel said

That the rains are gonna come
And I stepped out on the streets
All sparkling clean with the early morning dew

Maybe it was you or maybe it was me?
You came on like a punch in the heart
Lying there with the light on your hair
Like a Jesus of the moon
A Jesus of the planets and the stars

Well, I kept thinking about what the weatherman said
And if the voices of the living can be heard by the dead
Well, the day is gonna come when we find out
And in some kind of way I take a little comfort from that
Now and then

Cause people often talk about being scared of change
But for me I’m more afraid of things staying the same
Cause the game is never won
By standing in any one place
For too long

Maybe it was you or maybe it was me?
But there was a chord in you that I could not find to strike
You lying there with all the light in your hair
Like a Jesus of the moon
A Jesus of the planets and the stars

I see the many girls walking down the empty streets
Maybe once or twice one of them smiles at me
You can’t blame anyone for saying hello
I say hey
I say hello, I say hello

Will it be me or will it be you?
One must stay and one must depart
You lying there in the St. James hotel bed
Like a Jesus of the moon
A Jesus of the planets and the stars

I say hello… hello… hello…

c – 2008 Nick Cave