Tag Archives: Idiot Prayer Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace

A Perfect Rainy Day Here in the Hinterlands!

For some reason, the rainy  weather seems to have made me really sleepy today. I’m moving at a snail’s pace here. However, the rain is really lovely to look at, since the autumn leaves are now everywhere.

Laundry is now well underway here, and the morning will be spent going over the edits for “Half-Moon Bride,” so that I can get those back to the publisher ASAP. This will be my first time working with this editor so it will be interesting to see the types of changes they suggest making.

I usually just let editors go with whatever they want (within reason, obviously).  Writing & reading are just so subjective, and I’d much rather that an editor feel okay about seeing my name in their inbox over time. As an editor myself, over the years you start to really appreciate writers who are receptive and not difficult or too opinionated. And in the long run, a word change here or there, a sentence change — it really doesn’t add up to much if it’s a good story to begin with.

That said, though, if an editor is just really horrible to work with from the start then you absolutely need to get out of your contract. Nothing good is likely to come from that relationship, ever.

Okay! So. First off, due to lockdown restrictions, cinemas in Germany, France, Belgium and Italy have had to close again. The Nick Cave website sent out this link this morning so that you can stay updated about when the film version of Idiot Prayer – Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace will be rescheduled in your region.

Crazeysburg is not at all affected by the lockdown. Currently, the active virus cases here are still at zero. We are, however, affected by the fact that there is no cinema anywhere close to us for about 50 miles… so Idiot Prayer – Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace will not be showing here anytime soon, with or without a virus.

I’ll try to stick this in here so that it won’t get flagged  — if you are not accessing a news outlet or a social media platform that is allowing you to keep abreast of Tony Bobulinski, you can always use duck duck go to find out about it. This is a man who is now fearing for his life and the lives of his family. No joke.

All righty!

Back to Nick Cave… He sent out a Red Hand File yesterday that was quite beautiful, about his opinion on the state of the world right now.  You can read it at this link here if you so choose!!

Okay, I guess I better scoot, gang. Sorry this is so short. But it feels like everything is just taking forever around here! And the morning is racing by.

Have a lovely Thursday, wherever you are in the world!! I leave you with something lovely to listen to if you, too, have lovely autumn leaves tumbling down where you reside. Nat King Cole, singing “Autumn Leaves.” (Televised, around 1954 or so.) Listen, dream, enjoy. All righty. I love you guys. See ya!

“Autumn Leaves”

The falling leaves drift by the window
The autumn leaves of red and gold
I see your lips, the summer kisses
The sun-burned hands I used to hold

Since you went away the days grow long
And soon I’ll hear old winter’s song
But I miss you most of all my darling
When autumn leaves start to fall

C’est une chanson, qui nous ressemble
Toi tu m’aimais et je t’aimais
Nous vivions tous, les deux ensemble
Toi que m’aimais moi qui t’aimais
Mais la vie sépare ceux qui s’aiment
Tout doucement sans faire de bruit
Et la mer efface sur le sable les pas des amants désunis

© 1945 Jacques Prévert, Joseph Kosma, Johnny Mercer

Some Awesome Memories!!

Today is the 4th anniversary of Bunny’s passing — she was such a sweet cat. I swear that I still miss her every day.

I went looking for some old photos of her to post to the blog, and I serendipitously (which I don’t think is actually a word) discovered a bunch of photos that I forgot I had.

So it’s Memory Day again, here in Marilyn’s Room!!

First of all, I found a wonderful photo of Paul at Christmas, 1996. Paul was my best friend who died, whom I blogged about yesterday.

Paul at Christmas, 1996

He was already really sick here, but you can see that even while he was dying, he was just such a good-natured human being.

Here are two photos of Bunny right after I rescued her and her brother, Buster, from a NYC cat shelter in Times Square. They were a few months old already when I adopted them. Bunny is the larger cat, Buster, was the grey and white cat. I loved both of them so much, it was almost unbelievable.

Bunny and Buster on the dining room table on West End Avenue, NYC.

 

Wayne was not happy that I adopted two cats to replace Kitty after she died. But the rescue place wanted me to have this brother & sister pair, even though I had gone in to adopt a different cat. They insisted that I have these two instead and they wound up being such a joy to me.

Buster & Bunny in the nursery.

When Wayne and I thought we were having a baby, we decorated the nursery.  But no babies came, so it eventually turned into my office. So my office on West End Avenue was half-nursery. This is right after Bunny & Buster were adopted.

Our house from 1964-1966

 

I could not believe I found this photo!! This is the house my family lived in from 1964-1966, in Cleveland. I took the photo decades after we lived there, but this was our house! I have so many memories from this house. I could write an entire book just about that. I found out years later that both of my parents disliked this house, but my dad bought it because it was really close to the school — just down the block. And both me and my older brother started school when we lived here.

The house Mikey Rivera and I lived in together.

I did not even remember that I had this photo!! Mikey Rivera and I were going to buy this house in Easton, Pennsylvania. It was owned by a priest who rented it out. We were “renting to own” when my mom got sick and we wound up moving back to Ohio. We lived in it for 6 months.

My office in that house.

This was my office in that house. The house was really old — well over 100 years old. I edited a couple of anthologies in this office and wrote a few short stories, but didn’t live there long enough to write much more than that.

My office in the apartment in Pennsylvania.

This was my “office” in the apartment Mikey & I rented when we left NYC together, before we moved into that house above. We rented a small one-bedroom apartment in an old Victorian house that was on the Delaware River in Pennsylvania, in the foothills of the Pocono Mountains. We were less than 2 hours from NYC, so it was an ideal location. I could easily go back & forth to Manhattan to meet with publishers and other writers, etc., and Mikey could go visit his son, who was only about 6 years old (!!) at the time. (He’s now well out of college…).

My “office” was in a corner of the living room. He and I lived there for 3 years. I wrote 3 novels in that little corner — including Freak Parade, which I wrote about Mikey Rivera. I also wrote three novellas and many, many short stories in that little corner. I also edited 4 fiction anthologies. All in that little corner. I was extremely creative there.

Naturally, Mikey and I shared the tiny apartment with Buster & Bunny! And according to my lease, I was only allowed to have one cat. So we always had to hide Buster from the landlord. Luckily, the two cats looked enough alike, that if one would sit in the front window, you couldn’t really tell if it was a different cat. The only problem was to never let both cats sit in the front window at the same time. The landlord only lived a couple blocks away, so I was constantly worrying that he was going to see both cats at the same time. Luckily, my little desk was not far from the window, because I mean it was a constant chore to keep both of them out of that window at the same time. (It was a beautiful bay window, looking out over the river.)

Okay! That’s my little trip down Memory Lane for today.

Well, the podcast recording went very well yesterday, although I barely even mentioned The Guitar Hero Goes Home! We talked about a bunch of other stuff, instead. Mostly the state of the erotica publishing industry now compared with its heyday, when we all first met.  (Me, M. Christian, and Ralph Greco, Jr.) I will let you know when you can listen to it on YouTube.

And today, I am feeling better all the way around. The bruise on my thigh is a hideous mass of vibrant colors now, but almost all the pain is completely gone. And this evening, I’m meeting Kevin, the director of my play, for dinner, so I’m really looking forward to a chance to get out and socialize again. Yay!! And we’ll be discussing all the things that are going on with my play, so I’m very eager to hear about all that.

Nick Cave’s official web site sent out an email this morning, announcing the screening dates for the extended film version of  Idiot Prayer – Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace. To purchase tickets, you can locate your area here. (I think. I might have just given you the link that says you can’t yet buy tickets to see the film in Crazeysburg, but I’ve been assured the film is coming here soon!) (Just kidding, of course. Nothing comes to Crazeysburg!!)

Okay, that’s it!! Have a terrific Friday, wherever you are in the world.  Thanks for visiting, gang. I leave you with “Euthanasia,” the new song by Nick Cave, which is in that film mentioned above.  Enjoy. I love you guys. See ya!

It Was Just One of Those Days Here in Crazeysburg!

Because I fell and bruised my thigh beyond my ability to comprehend (if you are on your computer, you can see my Instagram photo from yesterday down below, which shows the awesome bruise and just how swelled up it got), I wound up spending a huge portion of yesterday in bed.

Not because I couldn’t walk, but because the pain was excruciating.

But today, even though the bruise is obviously still there and still swollen, the pain is really minimal.

And, while CBD oil did nothing to stop that kind of pain, it did calm me the fuck down and made everything in my world seem manageable. And by “manageable” I guess I mean  “just go to bed and stream The Monkees and forget about everything else in the world. ”

Oh, and I should mention here that I wound up liking that documentary, Hey, Hey We’re The Monkees, which I had started watching the other day. It was very informative and emotional.

Anyway. I also slept a lot yesterday, seeing as how I was already in bed. I didn’t get out of bed until after 5am today, which is later than I’ve been doing for quite a few weeks now.

So nothing new has been done to the new short story “Novitiate.” And at this point, if it is getting confusing:

  • The Guitar Hero Goes Home is now available in print with the corrected cover and the corrected text. (Also eBook — Amazon)
  • “Half-Moon Bride” will be available as a stand alone eBook in a few weeks (with my new publisher)
  • 1954 Powder Blue Pickup will be coming out in print before the year is over,  also with my new publisher
  • “Novitiate” will be part of what I currently call The Muse Revisited Vol. 4, which will also include my more popular “taboo erotica” short stories and novellas from the scope of my career. That will come out in print with my new publisher, as well, but probably not until early 2021 (especially if I don’t quit falling down on my kitchen porch).

So that’s what’s going on there, in erotica land.

In non-erotica land, the staged reading of my play, Tell My Bones, will premier online on Sunday evening EST, November 22nd. It will be free, but you will need to RSVP at an eventbrite link, which I will give to you when I have it. And if you miss the premier, you will have a window of maybe 3-5 days to watch it anyway.

Okay!

So Cave Things announced yesterday that you can pre-order the following really cute picture discs, each have one song on them from Idiot Prayer: Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace, which is being released as an album and also a film in November. Here are the picture discs, drawn by Nick Cave (I believe they are each £30, except that there are only 500 copies in each title, so you need to pre-order right away).

And with that, I’m also gonna close. So have a really nice Wednesday, wherever you are in the world. Thanks for visiting, gang!! I love you guys. See ya!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Still Alive & Well!!

Yes! I am talking about the petunias!

There is a layer of frost on my grown-up car this morning. There is frost on the rooftops. Frost on the lawns and on all the autumn leaves lying all over the lawns. And yet, the petunias are doing just fine.

I guess it has to be a real killer “killer frost” to faze these petunias.

So that was a sort of little happy burst of wonder when I went downstairs for breakfast this morning at 4am.

I also saw that another new song was dropped for the upcoming album, Idiot Prayer: Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace. And this one is actually a new song — “Euthanasia.” It was in my Amazon music library this morning. I just love this song. It is so pretty.

And while I’m thinking of it, I forgot to post yesterday that Nick Cave sent out another Red Hand File on Thursday that was very interesting, regarding a reader’s concerns about Narcotics Anonymous and stemming the seemingly endless tide of heroin addiction. You can read it here.

And also this morning, someone from Europe that I follow on Instagram, who only posts photos and quotes (in English) of various  writers and poets from all over the world, asked if he could quote me on his page today. I was so flattered. In all honesty, I love his page because I have found out about some really interesting writers and poets from South America and Europe by following his page.

He quoted from the ending of Neptune & Surf, and I sent him a photo of me, taken by Valerie while we were at Coney Island. This was during the years that I was actually writing Neptune & Surf. (N & S takes place on Coney Island in 1955.) (The photo is from 1994 or 1995.)

Since I now know how to capture people’s Instagram feeds, I share it with you here. (I really was so touched, gang.)

So my morning has been off to a pretty good start around here today.

I’m planning on just spending the day working on the new erotic short story, “Novitiate.” I’m at one of those junctures where the story begins to just go off the charts in terms of the eroticism, so it requires 110,000,000 % of my concentration.  (Luckily, I’m not prone to exaggerate, otherwise I’d probably throw some really huge number out there…)

Okay, now, on a more serious note.  I have to very soberly question what’s up with the new Tom Petty album — Wild Flowers & All the Rest. Slavish devotee of Tom Petty’s that I am, he (and Rick Rubin, the producer) had said over the years that there were something like 25 additional songs that were not included on the original album, but that Tom Petty had wanted to release on a follow-up to Wildflowers some day.

And this new album has been touted for many, many months (years?) as that album. However, even while there are 54 (!!) songs on this new album, there are only 6 (!!) songs on this collection that I would consider to be actually new, never-heard-before songs.

There are many songs that are never-before-heard versions of songs we already know — meaning they are his home demos. Or perhaps songs with their original lyrics, that wound up changing when the songs were eventually released on other albums. Or “live” versions of songs, etc.

But there are only 6 songs that I don’t recall ever hearing before, ever.  So where are the other 19 or so “brand new songs”?

I’m wondering if, next October, when we once more commemorate the anniversary of his death, they will be releasing the all-new Oops We Forgot to Include These follow-up to the follow-up of Wildflowers

I’m not 100% super happy about this, gang.

Anyway.  On we go, right?

Okay, sometime next week, I think I will finally be a guest on one of M. Christian’s podcasts (he co-hosts two podcasts), discussing The Guitar Hero Goes Home, and probably also talking positively about sex-positive topics. I will keep you posted!! I will try hard to speak like a grown-up. We shall see if I succeed or not. (Although I have already told them I will discuss anything except politics and the virus. So I’m not sure if there are any grown-up topics left…)

Regardless, I’m excited!!

Okay, let me get started here, folks. I hope you have a great Saturday underway, wherever you are in the world! I leave you with my breakfast-listening music from this morning. I was once again back to More of The Monkees! This one, another great tune penned by Mike Nesmith, a member of the group, “The Kind of Girl I Could Love”.  I truly love this song, it is so upbeat (well, I love the whole album). Play it loud. And enjoy. Thanks for visiting, gang. I love you guys. See ya!!

“The Kind Of Girl I Could Love”

Girl, you look mighty good to me
And I know that you’ve got to be
The kind of girl I could love.

You’ve got the sweetest pair of eyes
And your kiss would be paradise
The kind of girl I could love.

You do something to my soul
That no one’s ever done.
If you’re looking for true love
Then let me be the one.

Girl, deep in my soul I’m sure
And my heart has no doubt that you’re
The kind of girl I could love.
The kind of girl I could love.
[Repeat and fade]

© 1967 Michael Nesmith, Roger Atkins

I Found A Little Tiny Place That Saved Me

Finally. I found a teeny-tiny link that would let me access the classic editor.

To be fair-ish, I think that WordPress thinks there are readily accessed links to get to the old editor but none of those links worked.  Hence, my complete meltdown this morning, after clicking link after link after link…

But anyway. For now, I have my blog back and I cannot imagine why anyone on Earth thinks the new editor is easier to use than this older one is.

I’m going to try to have a good day here. But it’s sort of been a battle since waking up this morning. Regardless of the whole blog incident. Trying to see certain people in the best light. Trying to just have faith, trust that things will go in the best direction for everyone even if it means letting them go, try not to think that people you rely on to be decent and be your “friend” totally have their own interests at heart.

That kind of of thing.

Most days, I can handle it, because it’s called “life”. Other days, it adds to the piles of straw that breaks the wee bonny camel’s back.

The bright spot on the horizon today is that I’m having lunch with the director of my play, Tell My Bones, and I am really, really looking forward to being in the presence of another human being. (And a human being who has actually been really, really supportive of me from day one.) As I said yesterday, it’s been 3 months now since I’ve seen anyone that I actually know. (Texting and talking on the telephone is great but it doesn’t actually count, you know?)

I do like living in the middle of nowhere, gang, but I don’t like having no meaningful or even just fun interactions with human beings. It is going on 7 months now, this whole virus thing. (As if you didn’t know.) And even though I know that for a few people I know, the virus has caused them to be in really close quarters with people they love or are married to and it has driven the relationships to the breaking point — it’s still people to interact with!!!!

All I have are cats — and they aren’t even domestic cats.  So, basically, they all run away from me when I enter a room (unless it’s time to eat). Sometimes, it just feels like too much. That this virus crap is never gonna end.

Okay. Onward from that.

This is not actually a topic that is any cheerier, but I did see the results a survey this week, of 20,000 American college students regarding their thoughts on freedom of speech & expression, and tolerance vs. intolerance, violence as a suitable option against people who disagree with you, and how your specific University handles all that.

The majority of students who responded said they felt they did not feel comfortable expressing themselves to other students or to faculty. Which is so sad. The worst colleges for safe self-expression tended to be Liberal ones, as well as in the Ivy League.

The University of Chicago got the highest rating for protecting the rights of its students & faculty, though.

But what I found really interesting — and not in a good way — when it came to intolerance of other students and faculty, liberal female students were the worst offenders, followed closely by LGBTQ+ students.

Intolerance is just an outcropping of fear. So this sort of shows that we haven’t made any real progress at all in “equality,” have we? We just somehow managed to instill in liberal women and people who identify as LGBTQ+  (these are both categories that I fit into, btw) that intolerance and violence are the necessary means for shutting people down who threaten your sense of yourself.

It is just amazing to me. And it’s also been interesting to see, over this summer of all these riots, looting, hate, anarchy, etc., that young conservative female students who have spoken out all seem to be much more emotionally centered, self-confident, and tolerant. So, everything from the “old days” seems to have reversed.

It’s just very, very interesting.

Okay. So. More “coming soon” things on Nick Cave’s Cave Things that are really cool!! You might want to go check them out. My favorite thing so far is a china milk jug!! However, me thinks it will once again be way, way, way out of my price range, but do not let this deter you!!

And also something that is sort of related, but not really — Warren Ellis and Blixa Bargeld are now both on Instagram!

All righty. That’s really kind of it here today. Due to my time-consuming meltdown here this morning, I have not yet done yoga. So I want to get going with that and then get a little writing done before heading out to meet Kevin for lunch.

It is indeed the 3rd anniversary of Tom Petty’s death today.  What I prefer to focus on is that new album of his coming out in 2 weeks. They’ve dropped another new song, his own demo version of “Leave Virginia Alone,” which was a hit for Rod Stewart. (I pre-ordered the album, of course, so I get all the songs as they drop. I also pre-ordered Bruce Springsteen’s new one, Letter to You, and of course Nick Cave’s new one, Idiot Prayer: Nick Cave Alone at Berlin Alexanderplatz.) (Just kidding — it’s Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace.)

However, all that said, I have decided to leave you with my breakfast-listening music from today, a very old Rolling Stones song, “You Better Move On.”  I have loved it since I was a wee bonny girl. (Released in the UK in 1964, and in the USA in 1965, on their album December’s Children.) It was written by Arthur Alexander.

Okay. Enjoy. And thanks for visiting. I realize some of you have visited 3 times already this morning (!!) — I deleted the meltdown entries, though, and this is the official entry for today. So thanks for visiting. I love you guys. See ya.

Putting On My “Happy Guy” Face!!!

I won’t bog you down with the details, I’ll only say that I’m really happy to be making some story sales here AND even getting some editing work again. Here’s hoping things are slowly but surely getting back on track…

I need it to. That’s all I will say. Because we’re going to be positive around here and look forward!!

Today, in addition to working some more on the new erotic short story (“1954 Powder Blue Pickup”), I think Valerie and I are going to try to figure out why the heck the cover art for The Guitar Hero Goes Home is not doing what it is supposed to be doing — we had a long chat about it yesterday, and it gets mindboggling –why it keeps skewing the way it does, when, in the template, it keeps matching up perfectly.

It is disheartening. But we’ll get it figured out.

Meanwhile, every time I look at the cover of the proof copy that arrived yesterday, I just sort of sigh with a heavy heart…

I’m actually toying with the idea of trying to make the new short story a novella. If you’ve read last evening’s excerpt from the new story, you can probably tell that there are actual characters in the story and a story arc is underway. Unlike “Half-Moon Bride,” which basically had neither. So the groundwork is set if I want to actually extend it into something more significant.

However, this is another one of those situations, where I have no real clue what’s coming up next while I’m writing it — the story just comes out.  So we’ll see how it goes. Basically, everyday I simply sit down at the desk and I write…

Even though the writing has been going really great lately, I have been battling the urge to get rather melancholy. So far, I am winning the battle, but it is just constantly there, in the background. I guess mostly because summer is waning. And that storm the other night really took a toll on my incredibly beautiful hydrangea bush. I don’t think it’s going to be able to get back to how it looked before the storm because it is already so late in the season. It makes me so sad. The blossoms had gotten so huge, and the storm filled the blossoms with water, so now they’re bent way down to the sidewalk — and they had been 8-feet tall. That’s a lot of weight keeping it bent over.

I keep wishing there was something I could do, but the blossoms are getting old now and I need to accept that I can’t solve all of Nature’s “problems” — and it could be that Nature doesn’t think it has any problem at all. And I should just keep out of it, right?

And my lawn care guy has had a bad back issue so he hasn’t been here to cut the grass in 3 weeks. My yard now has that look of complete and utter abandonment. Which is not the overall look I prefer.

I hate feeling like I have no control, you know? Like I have to just stand back and allow everything. Let everything just be what it is. Sometimes it’s very frustrating for me.

So, the more I can sit at my desk and write and not focus on the things that make me sad, the better the day goes.

And on that little note… I’m gonna get the day underway here.  I hope you’re having a nice Wednesday, wherever you are in the world!  I think I mentioned the other day that Nick Cave’s solo concert is going to be released as an album in November. I’m going to leave you with a video they released from that concert — Nick Cave at  the piano, singing “Galleon Ship” from Ghosteen (2019). This is what I was listening to last night, as the whole world was trying really, really hard not to go flying off into a million pieces.  Okay, thanks for visiting, gang. I love you guys. See ya!!

“Galleon Ship”

If I could sail a galleon ship
A long, lonely rider across the sky
Seek out mysteries while you sleep
And treasures money cannot buy
For you know I see you everywhere
A servant girl, an empress
My galleon ship will fly and fall
Fall and fly and fly and fall deep into your loveliness

And if we rise my love
Before the daylight comes
A thousand galleon ships will sail
Ghostly around the morning sun

As the city rises up
As the city rises up
As the city rises up
As the city rises up

For we are not alone, it seems
So many riders in the sky
The winds of longing in their sails
Searching for the other side

And if we rise my love
Oh my darling, precious one
We’ll stand and watch the galleon ships
Circle around the morning sun

© 2019 Nick Cave, Warren Ellis

My God, People! Yesterday Was Intense!!

First of all, continuing in the happy theme of my post here last night, The Guitar Hero Goes Home is now available everywhere! As an eBook, on Kindle, and as a trade paperback !!!!!

[UPDATE: I have removed the eBook from Smashwords.]

Yay!! Kindle is $2.99,  and the paperback is $9.95

Here are the links:

Trade paperback via Amazon: The Guitar Hero Goes Home

Kindle eBook: The Guitar Hero Goes Home

My test proof for the print edition doesn’t arrive until tomorrow, but I already saw an online proof and I know I’m not going to make any changes, so the fact that it is already for sale is fine.

There are only 2 things that really bother me, that I could not change — the page numbering — where Page 1 begins on the Copyright page. And then the pages that set off the different sections — i.e., Part I, Part II, Part III, etc. — I could not give those their own, stand alone pages. Traditionally, they should appear on the right hand side of the book, with nothing printed on the back of the page. But they wouldn’t allow me to have any blank pages. So I find the formatting weird, but it can’t be changed and it won’t keep me from selling the book.

So it’s ready!!!!

In other brief news — I think I may have a publisher for “Half-Moon Bride”, even as a stand alone short story. I don’t know for sure yet, but I will keep you posted! And if it works out, then it could be likely that all my new hardcore D/s erotica that pushes the boundary of “questionable consent” could have a new home.

After yesterday’s seemingly endless nightmare, just trying to get the fucking eBook published for The Guitar Hero Goes Home, I would be happy to focus on writing as much as I can, and less on publishing when at all possible.

I have not formatted an ePub doc for eBook publishing since upgrading to the Windows 10 laptop. And the upgrade made all my old style-guides for creating ePub docs 100% obsolete.

So, what used to be something I could do almost on automatic, became something I had to learn all over again.

I was not at all in the mood for that yesterday, gang. I was having a seriously not happy day. And almost every single thing I needed to do to format that stupid ePub file got fucked up, and I spent hours sitting here at my desk, pretty much saying “Are you fucking kidding me??!!” every 5 minutes… I had to keep starting over, and starting over, and starting over.

Eventually, I took a piece of a piece of a piece of a Tylenol PM, so that I could at least calm down without actually going to sleep. And I started yet again, and finally figured out what the fuck I was supposed to do to get everything to work right. And at long last, it did.

And so it “went to press” as it were! And since it is not an erotic title, but merely “adult”, it means I did not have to go through the outraging insanity of having the Amazon keyword machine reject the entire manuscript based on a keyword it detected as objectionable yet without enlightening me to what taboo words were triggering the rejection.

Loyal readers of this lofty blog no doubt recall that this happened to me when I published The Muse Revisited, Vol.1 (on both Amazon and Smashwords back in 2012, or whenever it was), but Amazon rejected the manuscript without telling me why.

I eventually discovered, through endless and annoying trials and errors, that the thing that was triggering the rejection was in my short story “Muriel the Magnificent.” When Muriel is 7 years old, she gets a spanking from her dad, with her pants down– and the scene is not erotic at all. In fact, it’s the key scene of the whole story — it sets up Muriel as an adult, who is unable to feel erotic about her own body.  And she finally learns how to open up by accidentally seeing porn on the Internet.

This was back when the Internet was still brand new. And the story was written expressly for a British compilation at Hodder- Stoughton, The New English Library Book of Internet Stories (a non-erotic collection — mine was the only erotic story in there, but it was included because the story was good). And the story was indeed a huge hit. It got picked up as one of the best erotic stories of that year. And by the time I was trying to publish the eBook of  The Muse Revisited, Vol.1  on Amazon, “Muriel the Magnificent” had already been picked up for publication in a few other collections, in the US and overseas — all of which were on sale on Amazon and had been on sale on Amazon for several years.

But since eBooks at Amazon are judged by keyword machines and not human editors,  and since my eBook was labeled as “erotica,” a 7 year-old girl simply can’t get spanked by her dad with her pants down, regardless of the context.  So they spit back the entire book. And kept spitting it back, and kept spitting it back, until I finally figured out what the problem was, and as much as I hated to do it, I had to completely censor that key scene in order to get the book published. (So, yes, if you only know that story from The Muse Revisited collection, you’ve read a censored version of the story.)

Anyway, that’s annoying as hell, but it didn’t happen this time. Yay.

So — The Guitar Hero Goes Home is at long last published. I hope you’ll read it. There is sex in there, gang!! But … alas, not a lot (although there is a really cool spanking scene in it!!) Perhaps that will entice you… (Although it’s between 2 adults and… alas, it is not eroticized. It’s in fact one of those spankings that you don’t want to get…)

But anyway. I’m very happy and I can’t wait to get my test proof of it tomorrow. To hold it in my hot little  hands.

And I’m glad that at least the next 2 publishing projects are not going to require ePub files!! They are strictly POD. Thank God.

Well!! In case you were really busy doing something on July 23rd and weren’t able to catch Nick Cave’s solo concert on Dice — Idiot Prayer: Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace — the Nick Cave website announced this morning that there will be a theatrical release of the concert, starting November 5th, and that there is also an album coming — vinyl, CD, and streaming — November 20th. All the details are here.

I have to say that every time I see the title of that show, I always think it says Nick Cave Alone at “Berlin Alexanderplatz” — which was this amazing TV miniseries from Germany, back in 1980, adapted from a German novel of the same name about Berlin as it gradually falls under Nazi influence. It was directed by Fassbinder. I think you can probably stream it online — and you should, if you can. It was really, really good. However, Nick Cave is not in it, alone or otherwise. (But that should not deter you from broadening your intellectual horizons.)

Well, all righty!!! I need to get started here today. I haven’t done my yoga yet — I guess I’m still in the mindset of rejecting routines.  But I do want to do it since I didn’t do yoga yesterday. And then I need to finally finish “Half-Moon Bride.” Which means we need to have copious amounts of anal sex! Well, the characters do, at any rate. (However, if you’re feeling like your own day needs to move in that direction as well, far be it from me to attempt to dissuade you!!)

To be honest, my life is a little challenging right now, for reasons that I don’t want to post about, so to spend the rest of the day, sitting at my desk, encouraging our 2 love birds to have copious amounts of anal sex, as their wedding night wanes and before the sun comes up and our half-moon bride loses her erection for an entire 30 days… Well, that to me, sounds like a really great way to spend the day.

I hope Thursday is as good to you, wherever you are in the world!! Thanks for visiting, gang. My breakfast-listening music today was once again from Tom Petty & the Heartbreaker’s Live Anthology (2009).  This time, “Square One,” recorded live in Missouri, June 17th, 2006. I hope you enjoy it. It’s a song that gives me a lot of hope. I know, somehow, I’m going to get to a good place. Okay, I love you guys. See ya.

“Square One”

Had to find some higher ground.
Had some fear to get around.
You can say what you don’t know.
Later on won’t work no more.

Last time through I hid my tracks.
So well I could not get back.
Yeah my way was hard to find.
Can’t sell your soul for peace of mind.

Square one, my slate is clear.
Rest your head on me my dear.
It took a world of trouble, took a world of tears.
It took a long time to get back here.

Tried so hard to stand alone.
Struggled to see past my nose.
Always had more dogs than bones.
I could never wear those clothes.

It’s a dark victory.
You won and you are so lost.
Told us you were satisfied,
but it never came across.

Square one, my slate is clear.
Rest your head on me my dear.
It took a world of trouble, took a world of tears.
It took a long time to get back here.

© 2006 Tom Petty

Okay, Now We REALLY Gotta Get Organized!!

It has come to my attention that I now need to set up a weekly calendar, setting aside one specific day each week for concentrating on one specific thing. So that each week can become a little more productive.

For instance, those of you who are (extremely patiently) awaiting feedback, suggestions, opinions from me on something you’re in the process of writing, have already written, or have even already published — I am now going to set aside one day a week to focus strictly on reading other writers’ works and finally replying to them.

So if you are one of those people patiently waiting on me to get back to you, I am going to make sure I focus on it and get back to you in a meaningful way as soon as I can.

But please just make a note — if you’re a new writer, I’m happy to give suggestions or feedback , however, if you’re asking me for actual editing, I charge for that.  I am negotiable and flexible with my fees, though (i.e., a single parent who is still in college and working part-time — I will try hard to find a fee you can afford). I also am open to the idea of trading — if you’re an established writer needing an editor, and if you’re also good at editing,  I’m always happy to trade projects for “free” editing. But, you know, if I give you a 45-page chapbook to edit, it wouldn’t seem fair to give me a War & Peace-length novel to edit in return!!!

Anyway. I’m flexible!!!

So now I’m going to have set days when I’m writing, set days when I’m reading, set days when I’m brainstorming on new ideas, and set days to work on my once-again-growing Abstract Absurdity Productions “to-do” list.

I guess you can see that my work load has gotten a little out of control yet again.

All righty!!

So, this arrived yesterday!! It was waiting on my porch when I got home from my dad’s house.

SIGNED ETHAN RUSSELL PHOTOGRAPHS: THE MONOGRAPH (FINE ART BOOK ...

Ethan Russell probably took every single iconic photo of the Beatles and the Rolling Stones from my wee bonny girlhood!  And I mean every single one.

The Rolling Stones | Rolling stones keith richards, Keith richards ...
Book jacket for Ethan Russell Photographs

He also took equally iconic photos of the Who, Janis Joplin, The Doors, etc. — all photos that I also remember well from my girlhood. But those ones of the Beatles and the Stones were just a huge part of my life. And having them all collected under one cover is just kind of astounding to me, you know? He took so many of the photos that are truly ingrained forever in my brain, from a time when I loved all those musicians so much.

This was a Kickstarter campaign, and this was the second issue of the book. I don’t know if you can actually just buy the book somewhere.  But if you can, it is worth every penny.

Okay, also yesterday — I believe that I was the very last person on planet Earth to finally get the stream last night for Idiot Prayer:  Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace. At least that’s how it felt!! From those hours even before dawn yesterday, people in Australia and Asia were already posting to Instagram all their many comments and photos of the concert they were already watching. And then as the day unfolded, everyone all over Europe started doing the same thing. And then — finally – at 10pm Eastern time, the concert started streaming in my kitchen, and when I posted my own post to Instagram, absolutely everyone all over the world, except me, was already sound asleep…  or so it felt!

But, wow, gang — the concert was just beautiful. 90 minutes of him alone at the piano, just singing one song after another and the time flew. He sang one brand new song (I think it’s brand new),  “Euthanasia,” that was so captivating. And I thought to myself, Wow I am going to remember every word of this! But of course, when I woke up this morning, I discovered I couldn’t even recall one word of it. But it was beautiful. I do remember that.

Nick Cave Announces Solo Piano Concert Livestream, Shares Trailer ...

Oh, here’s something amusing. If you recall, a couple months back, I posted the Einstürzende Neubauten song, “Wedding,” to the blog. It’s one of the songs off their new album, Alles in Allem.  And I commented that I thought the song was about a wedding but that, knowing Einstürzende Neubauten, it might not be about a wedding at all. And, if you watched that Q&A I posted the other day with Blixa Bargeld, you, like me, discovered that “Wedding” is actually a neighborhood in Berlin.

So there we have it!!  Indeed: not about a wedding at all.

Okay. I have a “to-do” list here that is longer than anything you can possibly imagine, gang — including a phone conference with Peitor in a couple hours for Abstract Absurdity Productions work. (We will be discussing which micro-script(s) we need to begin writing next Tuesday.)

And first, I need to write up that weekly calendar and post it to the wall!!! (Wait – no!! First, I have to go down to the kitchen and get another cup of coffee, then call my dad, then write up that calendar — then actually start working.)

So I’m gonna scoot. Have a great Friday, wherever you are in the world. On my trip down to see my dad (about a 3-hour drive each way), I listened to The Good Son, a Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds album from 1990. I usually listen to the song “Foi Na Cruz” over and over and over when I put on The Good Son CD in the kitchen, or stream it from my phone in the car. I just love the groove of that song, and once I start playing it, I can’t seem to ever move on to the rest of the CD anymore.

However, in the car, I just let the whole album play (several times) and was really astounded to rediscover what an incredible album it is. Every single song on it is a gem. (And two songs from it were huge hits: “The Ship Song,” and “The Weeping Song.”)

But when I got almost to the end, and “The Witness Song” came on, it was like turning a corner and seeing your long-lost best friend suddenly standing there!! I had totally forgotten what a killer song it is. Just fucking awesome. So on my 3-hour drive back home yesterday, I played “The Witness Song” on repeat  for the entire 3 hours. And it made the trip just fly, gang. It felt like a 20-minute drive. It really did.

So that is what I leave you with today!! Enjoy!!! (Play it loud.) Thanks for visiting. I love you guys. See ya!

“The Witness Song”

Yeah, yeah
Well, well
I took a walk down to the port
Where strangers meet and do consort
All blinkered with desire
And a winter fog moved thickly on
A winter fog moved thickly on
A winter fog moved thickly on

Now, who will be the witness
When the fog’s too thick to see

And I saw a friend beside a wall
Her hands were raised in supplication
And her face I could not see at all
And I raised my hands in rage
And brought them down again
And we entered through the eastern door
And I entered through the eastern door
And she entered through the eastern door

Now, who will be the witness
When you’re all to blind to see
O yes, yes, yes

And time gets somewhat muddled here
But no matter, no matter
Here come the events all tumbling down
Now, beyond the wall was a great garden
Into which we passed
Me and my friend
And the place was all overgrown with weeds
And behold from its centre there rose a great fountain
The fountain with the healing waters
And we knelt down by the rim
And I dipped my hand in
And she dipped her hand in too
And I said “Are you healed?”
And she said “Well are you healed?”
And I said “Yes, I’m healed”
And she said “Well, yes I’m healed then too”
And I said “Babe, you are a liar”
“Babe, you are a liar”
“Babe, you are a liar, too”
Now, who will be the witness
When you’re all to healed to see

And I kissed her once, I kissed her twice
And made my way to leave her
And she raised her hand up to her face
And brought it down again
I said “That gesture, it will haunt me”
“That gesture it will haunt me”
And I left there by the eastern door
She left there by the western door

Now, who will be the witness there
When you’re blind and you can’t see
Who will be the witness there
When you’re all so clean and you cannot see
Who will be the witness there
When your friends are everywhere
Who will be the witness there
And your enemies have ceased to care

© 1990 Nick Cave

Let’s Get Ready to Party!!

Wow, what an awful lot of busy-work emails I’ve had to attend to here this morning!!

However, now everything is done. Replies sent out, papers filed, bills paid, etc. For all intents and purposes we are now moving onward to my BIRTHDAY!!

Happy Birthday Balloon Cake Recipe - BettyCrocker.com

I’m heading out to my dad’s first thing tomorrow morning, and might not post again until Friday.  I’m not sure. Sometimes I like to post from my phone. We’ll see. But I’ll be at my dad’s (whose county is still basically under lockdown) for my birthday tomorrow, and his 90th birthday on Thursday, heading back home Thursday afternoon.

But, yes, tomorrow, I turn 60!! It is so hard to believe. And yesterday — if you don’t follow me on Instagram and don’t already know this — I got carded!! Yes!! Me!! I was 2 days away from turning 60 and the guy at the gas station asked to see my ID before he would sell me a pack of Pall Mall cigarettes.

(For non-Americans: being carded means that they want to see your legal identification to prove how old you are. In Ohio you must be 21 to buy cigarettes.)

I was so thrilled that there was some question about how old I was! (BTW, I still don’t smoke, but I do always have an unlit, unfiltered cigarette in my mouth now, every time I sit down at my desk to write. So I’ve now gone through an entire pack of Pall Malls.) (By the way, my parents smoked Pall Malls when I was a wee bonny toddler! Back then, they were filterless. Nowadays, I have to carefully snap the filters off.)

Pin on Old Ads

I guess I do dress sort of like a non-adult. I had on a baggy red t-shirt from the dollar store that says “LOVE” across the front of it. I had on baggy cargo shorts. Flip-flops. My sunglasses. And my hair is not only really long now, but I’ve been using this awesome daily leave-in conditioner from France — 94% pure organic avocado oil — and, for some reason,  it has toned the silver in my hair way down, making it look almost white-blonde now.

So I’m guessing that all of it together, had a lot to do with that guy thinking I was WAY younger than I’ve been in decades!!!!

I was just so thrilled, you know? And it was funny because as I was taking out my Driver’s License at a gas station to prove I was 60 years old and legally allowed to buy a pack of Pall Malls (for $7) that I won’t actually smoke, I flashed back to being 13, buying a pack of Salem’s that I was indeed going to smoke, and not even needing to speak to a person in order to buy them — I just put my money in the cigarette machine that was located outside right next to the gas pump. And it was something like 3am when I was buying the cigarettes. I mean that seriously. I was out wandering around at 3am (I did that a lot at 13), and I just  walked up to the machine and bought a pack of Salem’s for — (drum roll!!!!!) — 35 cents!!!

Image detail for -add to cart salem cigarettes ad vintage ...

What’s also weird, is that back when I was 13, I looked a lot older than I was, and in restaurants, waiters would always ask me if I wanted a cocktail before dinner! Honestly. So weird, right? Now I have to prove that I’m old enough to buy a pack of cigarettes.

To refresh your memory: Marilyn Jaye Lewis at age 13

I love that it happened yesterday. I doubt it’s an all-out new trend, though, or anything.

Okay, well. There is a new Q &A with Blixa Bargeld about Alles in Allem,the new Einstürzende Neubauten album. It’s on YouTube and it is quite cool, and you can watch it right here:

And Nick Cave’s web site sent out a beautiful promo this morning for Thursday’s concert streaming event . (Ticket purchasing info is here.) Here is the brief promo:

And with that, I’m gonna scoot!! Thanks for visiting, gang!! Have a terrific Tuesday, wherever you are in the world! I love you guys. See ya!

Yes, Indeedy!!

Today is the day we drive over to the next county to go get the groceries. (By “we,” I of course mean me and my sexbot, Henry — pictured with me above — who is a really good driver.)

And the next county over, is now back to being in Code Red with the fucking virus. Which really only means that you still have to wear your mask, but what it also means is that if you don’t wear your mask, you’re in trouble.

So here’s hoping that I can just get to town and back and get it over with without any drama. Loyal readers of this lofty blog perhaps recall that last Monday, my trip to town to get groceries involved “drama,” in the way of an expensive flat tire that made a normal hour and a half trip, turn into a 5 hour trip. And I really don’t feel like spending 5 hours in a county that’s back in Code Red.

Okay!!

Sorry I didn’t post yesterday, but the heat was just unreal. The heat index was up to 102 degrees Fahrenheit around here — a truly bright & relentlessly sunny day!! Until evening, when storms blew in and finally brought the temperatures down and I could think straight again.

I wanted to post yesterday morning, but instead I sat for a really long time staring at the blog, wondering how to form a coherent sentence and then type it. Finally, I gave up and collapsed back in bed.

Well, I have some exciting projects on the horizon!! Yes — more writing projects. These will be non-fiction, journalism-type projects, having to do with sex. Not erotic, just sexual health or sexual well-being. Or maybe even the new sexual frontier!! (There is one, by the way!! And Henry, my beloved sexbot, is a big part of it!!) (Alas, no — I still can’t afford a sexbot.)

But the writing projects are real.  (And, yes, maybe even another web site. I know. I’m nuts. Anyway.) I have a phone conference on Thursday to start getting a better understanding of that.

Yes!! Something else to do on Thursday!! It begins with my dad’s 90th birthday in Cincinnati — and now I will have to drive back here to Crazeysburg in time for the phone conference. Then later Thursday night, Idiot Prayer: Nick Cave Alone at Alexandra Palace will happen!!

Don’t forget to buy your ticket!!  As you can see here, seats are limited!! (Oh wait, it looks like that one available seat has already been claimed by Nick Cave…)  I am of course, JUST KIDDING! You stream the concert on the DICE app and sit wherever you fucking want to sit!! Yay!!

Honestly, though. I can’t wait for this concert. I’m super excited.

And, in summation, I have some really cool projects coming up in my tidy little future that I will know more about on Thursday.

I don’t know about you, but I awoke to more bad news coming out of China — just be aware of it, people. I don’t think India is so far off the mark by banning Chinese phone apps, like Tik Tok and WeChat, because the apps are monitoring you, while you’re off being harmlessly silly on your phone! And this article from this morning by tech journalist, Shane Tews, didn’t make things sound any safer. In part, she says:

“…China wants to move away from the global internet’s ubiquitous architecture, which is based on TCP/IP, to a centralized model using government-approved standards.

“[But] China is leveraging policy and technology in an attempt to create a new protocol that is friendlier to Beijing’s goals and Chinese Communist Party ideals. China’s first National Cybersecurity Strategy described the need for the internet to be more structured to enable cyberspace as a “new territory for sovereignty.” Under President Xi Jinping, links between national security, cybersecurity, and technology have been reinforced and are a top policy priority…

“This is why the multi-stakeholder engagements that allow civil society to play a key role alongside industry, academia, and governments should be involved when national security and human rights could be affected. China’s rise in technical expertise will continue to fuel tension in these discussions. While China’s capabilities are often on par with or best in class for new technologies, it is abusing the realm of standards policy–setting in an attempt to take over governance of the internet. If this happens, the internet as we know it will quickly be diminished.” — China’s tech ambitions threaten to fundamentally change how the internet functions

The article is much more detailed than what I’ve included here. You can read it in full at that link above, if you don’t mind getting thoroughly depressed.

And if you do enjoy getting thoroughly depressed about China, then also keep this in mind — if you didn’t hear about this back in May:

“…backed by Beijing, Huawei and other Chinese telecoms companies are assiduously working to bend the international 5G standards process to their interests. In sum, discounting Huawei as an “inefficient . . . sloppy” competitor is belied by its relentless rise and current 5G position.

“As US intelligence officials pointed out [at the time], it was quite likely that these [Huawei] “glitches” were calculated, in that Beijing and Huawei aimed to hide future malware or backdoors within supposedly flawed software.” – Huawei Is Not A Paper Tiger

I know it seems like I’m being anti-China today, but I’m really only anti-Mainland Government, not the actual Chinese people.

But, if you’re an American Democrat,  keep this in mind, too:

“Biden’s position on China is dangerous and not based in reality. For years the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) has been sending Chinese students to America’s top doctorate programs in order to gain access to university research labs. There, they steal intellectual property from the highest levels of U.S. science.

“Now, we know China’s dangerous handling of viruses in its own labs has led to one of the most devastating and fastest economic destructions in global history.”  — Katie Pavlich, Joe Biden’s China Problem

This kind of stuff, gang. I knew so many mainland Chinese people when I lived in NYC and that kind of stuff was happening constantly, even back then — sending people over here to gather information to send back there. It’s real.

And I only keep bringing it up because I am so angry at the Democratic Party for purposely proposing a puppet candidate like Biden — like we’re stupid and can’t fucking see through all of this.

However, the eagerness of so many Democrats to want to vote for this guy is scariest of all to me.

Anyway. On that happy note, I intend to move on to the rest of my morning around here.

I hope you have a really good Monday planned for yourself, wherever you are in the world. For some reason, I was back to listening to Cat Stevens again last night — Tea For the Tillerman, from my wee bonny girlhood. Specifically, his hit song from that 1970 album, which I’ve posted here before, “Wild World”.  I will leave you with that again today! You know, clearly, when it comes to the world, nothing ever really changes, does it, gang? All righty! I love you, guys. See ya!